


The Lonely Guardian

by Blanc_et_Noir



Series: Dream SMP BS [9]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Anarchist Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Arguing, Betrayal, Bittersweet Ending, Clay | Dream-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Cottagecore Dream, Dad Schlatt, Domestic Fluff, Dream Team SMP Spoilers, Dreamon, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Enemies to Friends, Exile, Exiled TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Family Dynamics, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Friends to Enemies, Friendship, Gen, Healing, L'Manberg War of Independence on Dream Team SMP (Video Blogging RPF), Long-Haired Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Minor Injuries, Potions, Protective Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Realization, Redemption, Self-Acceptance, Self-Discovery, Self-Exile, Self-Indulgent, Self-Reflection, Serious Injuries, Sibling Tension, Sick Character, Sickfic, Soft Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Younger Sibling Toby Smith | Tubbo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:15:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 46,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28340742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blanc_et_Noir/pseuds/Blanc_et_Noir
Summary: Dream didn't know what came over him, he wanted some time to think. Some time turned to days and thinking turned to building a nice home. Days turned to weeks and the home is bigger and cozier now.Weeks turned to years and it's been a while since Dream has seen his friends. Still, they're definitely living a more peaceful life now that he's gone, right?(Or, Dream left and started a cottagecore after the L'manberg Revolution and a Dreamon took his spot and the plot continues as it does in canon. Except, we have a Dream who likes to stay in his cottage and help his injured friends without telling them who he is, exactly)
Relationships: Alexis | Quackity & Clay | Dream, Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Jschlatt (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Toby Smith | Tubbo, Clay | Dream & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Wilbur Soot, Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF) & Everyone
Series: Dream SMP BS [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1974895
Comments: 726
Kudos: 2938





	1. A New Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He ran. 
> 
> He didn't know why but he ran.

Dream didn't know what came over him. The moment he gave L'manberg their Independence and passed over the discs to George and Sapnap, he left. For lack of a better term, he ran away. Ran away from his lands, ran away from his mistakes, ran away from his regrets. 

He didn't know what came over him, what made him run. He had just given L'manberg Independence. He had just won the stupid duel against Tommy. He had gotten the discs. He had everything but when he turned to celebrate with Sapnap and George, the two merely looked tired and confused. 

Maybe that's when he realized that he had dragged his two friends along to a long and convoluted plot just to get the discs. 

_The first time he had set his eyes on the discs, Tommy was proudly showing them off to Tubbo. He chuckled, coming closer to see what the fuss was all about. When he did, Tommy shouted at him to listen as he shoved the disc inside a jukebox. When calming notes began to play, Dream closed his eyes and listened. They were beautiful. The next time he opened them, the next time he realized what he was doing, he stood before two battered teens while holding the discs proudly in his hands. What had he done?_

The stupid discs. His stupid fixation. Sometimes, he forgets why he wanted them so badly. Just to fuck with Tommy? Make the kid mad? He had just gone to liter war against two children for stupid discs. It's like the thought had slapped him in the face when he saw his friend's tired eyes. 

**He was being selfish.**

He didn't know how long or how far he ran but he stopped in a beautiful clearing. He heard the rushing of a waterfall and river not far from here and the trees opened up to shine light upon the clearing. The grass was tall and beautiful and Dream dropped to the ground. 

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He won't forget the look in Tommy's eyes when he had challenged him to a duel. He couldn't forget the look in Tubbo and Fundy's eyes when he blew up L'manberg. He did all that, for what? To prove a point? To show he was right? To show power? To get the discs? In the end he just gave them freedom anyways, what was all that for?

He had turned those lands into a home. A place people could stay and be safe. A place where everyone could be free. So why, why did they start a revolution? Why did he fight back? What was all this for? Why was he being such a manipulative idiot?

_He remembered looking down at the lands that he called his own. At the beautiful rolling fields. At the tall walls that were built to keep him away. His lips thinned as he showed it to George, the older man looking less bothered. He proclaimed how these were his lands, how it was being stolen from him right under his nose. At least, that's what he was proclaiming. What he told George and Sapnap. He never mentioned how Wilbur had first asked him about the nation. He never mentioned how they weren't even stealing anything. That they just wanted a small place to call their home._

He brought a hand to his mask, unclasping it and staring down at the smooth porcelain that depicted a smile. This was the very same mask they had stared back at. The very same mask that hid his emotions. The very same mask that he wore to hide himself. He let out a breathy chuckle. 

Why did he fight back anyways? 

"I'm so stupid." Dream leaned back, letting the mask fall from his hand as he looked up at the sky. "I'm a terrifying monster now… A villain."

_The way the L'manberg citizens looked at him made him feel sick. Wilbur looked at him with contempt and bitterness. Fundy stared at him with anger and hate. Tommy met his eyes and looked back with determination, fear and hatred. Tubbo, sweet Tubbo, looked at him in disappointment, fear and bitterness. They all looked at him like it was his fault._

Dream squinted, licking his lips. If he stayed… just how far would he go? Just how much of a villain would he become? Just how bad would his fixation be? Just how many friends would he lose?

That's the question. He had been friends with everyone he had invited to his lands. He was close to them in one way or another. Then, he destroyed all that when he went against Tommy and Tubbo for the discs. It all started as some game, a way to entertain the two while they were there. Then it spiralled down and down and Dream realized it wasn't a game anymore. 

The teens were fighting for their lives now.

_"It's us against you, Dream."_

He hummed and let himself fall back, the grass tickling his back as he laid on the soft ground, "I could just leave…"

It wasn't like he was wanted anyways, right? It was why L'manberg even started. Why Wilbur, Tommy, Tubbo, Fundy and the rest revolted. They didn't want him. They didn't see him as just. They didn't want him as a leader. They just didn't want him in their lives. They had revolted to start a new nation of freedom and peace. A nation that allowed them to be away from him.

He opened his eyes and frowned. Away from him. What did he ever do? Was he too bold? Too controlling? Did he breathe down their necks too much? Was he too big of a presence? Was he intimidating? Did he come off as too strong, too passionate? Was he too manipulative?

_"I WANT WHITE FLAGS, WHITE FLAGS OUTSIDE YOUR BASE, AT DAWN OR YOU ARE DEAD!"_

_"You either surrender or I blow up your whole country."_

_"I can offer you more than what L'manberg ever will. I offer you a kingdom and a crown."_

_"They are stealing it from me, I told them that they can have the land but they can't be independent. It's like coming into your home and declaring this part of your house as mine. It's not how it's supposed to be."_

_"If I see any of you in my lands, ever again, you're dead."_

Thoughts and scenarios spiralled all around his mind and it made him dizzy. He groaned and pushed himself up. This wasn't getting him anywhere and he only felt more confused. He looked around him, at the many trees that surrounded the area. Maybe he needed something to distract himself. 

He pushed himself off the ground and stood up, dusting himself off. He looked down at the mask and brought it up, pocketing it in his hoodie pocket. He'll wear it later. He opened his inventory and pulled up an axe, moving to chop down a nearby tree. The relaxing and method sound of the axe hitting the wood calmed Dream a bit. He breathed in and out, chopping down the tree. It wasn't long before he had wood in his inventory. 

He sat on the ground, crossing his legs as he crafted a crafting table. He set it down and got to work crafting more wooden planks, a door and some fences. He pulled himself up with the help of the crafting table and looked at the clearing. Building a house was methodological. It could help calm him and his thoughts. He smiled and set off to start with the foundation of the house, building the walls up and around. 

He had a little design in mind and he started with that, setting the wooden planks down in a pattern as he outlines a house. When he ran out of blocks, he turned and got his axe out. It was calming just how practiced his actions were. Three trees were chopped down and he crafted more wooden planks. He hummed a familiar tune as he started building. He stepped back to admire his work, squinting a bit to see it in the light. 

"That looks good." 

He nodded to himself, proud. The house, or cottage more like, looked decent. It was coming together neatly and Dream felt his chest swell up in pride. He turned and crafted some wooden stairs to use as an accent for the cottage. As he got back to work, all thoughts of his lands and his friends vanished from his mind. He completely dedicated his focus on the creation of the cottage. When he finished, he stepped back and admired his work. 

He grinned and brought the crafting table inside, making more wooden planks as he dug out the floor. The moment he finished, the sun was setting outside. Dream licked his lips and wiped the sweat from his forehead as he leaned on his crafting table. Maybe spending the night here wouldn't be that bad, he didn't know how far from his lands he really was anyways. 

He opened his inventory and grabbed some spare wool. He crafted a nice bed with white sheets, having no dye with him, and set it down to the side. He stretched his arms above his head and sat on the edge of the bed. He pulled his hoodie off his head, leaving him in a black turtleneck. He blinked when his mask tumbled from the hoodie pocket to the floor. 

He picked it up and hung his hoodie on top of the crafting table. He placed his mask on top of it, a silent promise to wear it again when he wakes up. He got in bed, pulling the sheets over himself as the cold night wind settled in. He closed his eyes and for the first time, he slept well.

When the rays of sun peeked in, Dream blearily blinked his eyes and turned over, groaning. He stayed like that for a minute before he stretched and pushed himself up. He let his legs hang off the edge of the bed and he looked around him. The cottage was spacious and he smiled at the thought of filling up the room. He glanced at his mask and hoodie and decided to forego the two for the day. 

He opened his inventory and took out his ender chest. He set it down and sifted through his items. He took out a few materials to help him fix up his cottage and find materials while also keeping a few of the useless junk in his inventory. He paused, hand hovering over his weapons as he stared them down. With a sigh, he moved his crossbow to the Ender Chest but kept his axe. 

"I'm going to need it." He muttered to himself, more to convince himself why he would keep the axe instead of storing it away. It helped ground him, sometimes. He didn't want to have it out of his sight or reach.

He stood up and stretched, moving out with a smile on his face as he began his little quest for materials. He set out and followed the sounds of rushing water where he was met face to face with a beautiful waterfall and river. He crouched down and searched the riverbank for some sand that he could smelt for windows. He grinned when he found some sand peeking out and sat down.

He rolled up his pants leg, took off his shoes and waded into the water, shifting from his axe to his shovel. He dug up the sand and kept it in his inventory. He looked around and let the cold water rush against his exposed feet. He breathed in and let it out, closing his eyes. 

_He could see their scared and terrified faces as the land around them blew up. He watched as their eyes turned from hopeful to terror as he and the rest of his team walked out from the exposed walls, weakness and poison potions at the ready. He could see the complete fear in their eyes as Dream reached around the code and emptied their inventories while they were down._

He breathed out and opened his eyes. Never again. He had abused his power, he had manipulated his words and actions, he had done all those things. For what? 

Another deep breath. 

_He felt Eret's eyes on him as he explained his plan, as he proposed to Eret kingship. As he handed the land's kingship to this man while promising it to his friend. He felt his eyes as he turned away, smiling in satisfaction at what he achieved. Satisfaction that the pieces are falling together and it won't be long before he'll get what he wanted._

But what was it that he wanted? He looked down at the reflective water of the rivers as it flowed despite his presence. How it moved along even if there was a force like him present. It made him smile, knowing that even with him things are still going the way they want it to, not him. 

He knew he could easily block it, change its movements to what he desires. It's a habit he had taken up when he got addicted to playing manhunt with his friends. Not being in control scared him, it made him want to hide and never leave. When he was in control, there was nothing to fear. No one to fear. 

**No one to fear but himself.**

_He knew how much those discs meant to Tommy. He knew they were valuable to the ever chaotic kid. That meant it was the only way to control him. Everyone had one, an item or person that made them easier to control. He knew every single person's item. He knew how to control them. It was why he had vehemently disagreed with Wilbur about the drug van. It didn't break any rules, per se, but he knew it was precious to the man- and by extension, Tommy._

He sighed and got out of the river, shaking his legs to get them dry. Thinking about it won't do him any good. He already caused chaos, he already did harm. He already manipulated people who he wasn't supposed to. Actually, he wasn't supposed to manipulate people, period. It just made them less important, more like pawns to him. It made him feel icky and disgusted in himself.

He can excuse himself for manipulating the hunters during a Manhunt, it was done to survive. He had a clear goal in mind. What he did during the L'manberg Revolution, he had no goal. It was all in self interest. It wasn't clear whether he wanted chaos, the discs or control. It all blurred together and gave him a headache. He picked up his shoes and strode back to his little cottage area, letting the grass tickle his bare feet. 

On the way back, he stumbled upon a little flower patch and he smiled. He crouched down and picked some up with plans of replanting them in a little personal garden of his own or in his cottage. He continued on and reached his little home. He smiled to himself and walked inside, setting his shoes down beside the crafting bench and sitting on the ground. 

He placed the sand into the furnaces he had set up earlier and placed in some coal he was keeping in his inventory for some reason. He leaned back and let the warmth of the working furnace calm him. The light caught his porcelain mask and brought his attention to it. He stared at the mask before reaching for it. He looked at it as he ran a thumb across the smooth porcelain. He had handcrafted the mask himself, making it long before he had met either George or Sapnap, the two males never seeing his face before. Not even when he had fallen and cracked the mask multiple times during a Manhunt, no one ever saw the sparkling emerald eyes and the splatter of freckles that hid behind the mask. No one ever saw the genuine and better smile that hid behind the plastic and fake one. 

This was the very same cold, hard mask that everyone saw him as. The very same mask that made him who he was. The very same mask that manipulated and used people for the benefit. The very same mask that made him lose sight of what he truly wanted. Dream sighed and set it down. He doesn't have the heart to destroy it, his hoodie as well. He frowned before standing up. He crafted a chest before he broke the one piece of wood at his entrance. He placed the chest in and folded his hoodie inside. He placed the mask on top before he closed the chest and sealed it off with wooden planks. He had left his communicator back at his home, anyways. He had left everything personal to him back there except for his weapons and whatever he had in his chest.

It felt symbolic and freeing. It was like he was burying a part of him that he never wanted to see ever again. It was like he was starting anew, beginning a newer and better chapter of his story. A chapter that doesn't bring chaos and pain to his life. He patted the wooden floor with a smile, he won't be going back to that existence anymore. He's going to be better, to strive for something clearer. Peace.

He hummed and turned back, his attention going back to the glass that he was smelting. He was going to start a new life in this very clearing. A life where he can just rest and have the peace he had always wanted. A life where there is no conflict, no manipulation and no negativity. He smiled. That sounded nice.

~~It's not like he'll be missed anyways.~~

~~It's not like he'll miss anything anyways.~~

_~~It's not like there's anything that's going amiss the moment he left.~~ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some little notes about world building wink wink
> 
> \+ servers are different worlds you can jump to and fro but the process is both tedious and painful so people tend to stick to one server
> 
> \+ live system differ around servers, some act like hardcore worlds, others act like survival
> 
> \+ everyone is half immortal, they can't die of old age and they age super slow but they can still die of wounds and injuries 
> 
> \+ respawning doesn't work with a set bed or spawn point, you die as you are and your body repairs itself on the spot and you wake up from a self induced coma. Whether someone moves your body or not, your body doesn't disappear or poof out
> 
> \+ you can pull up ur inventory as like a holographic screen, everything's the same except you don't have the armor slots and only keep the inventory slots and the crafting ones
> 
> \+ depending on your memory, you can easily switch from one item to the other without needing to open your inventory
> 
> \+ There's no chat, you need to use communicators for this, acts kinda like discord


	2. Changing Seasons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He enjoyed his little ~~self imposed exile~~ cottage life. 
> 
> He even has a farm!
> 
> He didn't expect a visitor...

He had stayed there for days already, fixing up the little cottage and decorating the surrounding area. He had foregone wearing shoes at some points, liking the feeling of grass on his bare feet. It felt grounding, like it was reminding him that he was there. He smiled to himself as he surveyed his little cottage. It looked pretty, with the intricately designed roof that pointed upwards and the pretty pastel pink and blue stained colored windows. He stretched his arms above his head and walked inside his home.

He checked his inventory to see how much food he had left and blinked at the worryingly small amount. He'll have to hunt or start a farm soon. He hummed and pulled on his shoes, hunting sounded good at the moment. He walked out and checked the sun's position from up top. It wasn't that late yet so he could go and find a few cows or sheep. He switched for his axe and moved through the trees. While he won't be using his skills much, it wouldn't hurt to keep in shape. So, he pulled himself up a tree and started to jump. 

He navigated through the trees with practiced ease before he came upon some grazing grounds. A few sheep and cows lingered around and Dream chuckled to himself. Moo-moo meadows. He dropped down carefully, making barely any sound when he touched the grassy floor. His hand brushed against the grass and he blinked, feeling a few seeds under his palm. He picked them up and stored them into his inventory. He might start a farm perhaps. 

He stood up from his crouch and approached the cows. He might consider dragging a few back to his home so he'll have a steady supply of food. Maybe even a few sheep would do well for him. Still, he needed to build the fencing if he'll start an animal farm and he needed some food right now. He heaved his axe over his shoulder and approached a cow. He'll make this as painless as possible. 

He swung down his axe, successfully decapitating the cow. It didn't even have the chance to let out a sound before it dropped dead to the ground. Dream crouched down as he kept his axe, pulling the cow over his shoulders and heaving it with him to bring home. He'll leave the rest of the cows and sheep to bring over for his farm later on, when he had it all set up. He reached his home and set the cow down by the front. His axe appeared once more and he started to strip the cow of it's meat. 

When he was done, he kept the leather in his chest, shoved the steak into a furnace to cook and buried the rest of the carcass in the forest. He hummed and placed down his bucket of water, using it to wash the blood off his hands. He looked down at his stained shirt and pulled a face. He'll have to make new clothes soon. He threw the dirty water out and started to craft fences. He'll start the beginnings of the animal now, it wasn't like he had anything else to do. 

He did three rounds into the forest, cutting down and replanting trees to gather enough materials for his little farm shed. He had built a little farm house for the animals, keeping four pens inside and under the roof. While he only found sheep and cows at the moment, he'll be sure to find some pigs and chickens as well. Dream smiled at the progress he made, dusting his hands when he finished. 

He wondered idly why he didn't choose to do this while he was back in his lands rather than constantly fighting. His mood dampened at the thought as he realized he probably took away the rest of his friends' ability to have such calming fun with his constant fighting. He sighed and turned around, moving back into the safe confines of his home as the sun started to set. He had taken a lot from his friends during the war, he had betrayed their trust and ruined their chances. At least now they would be capable of living their own life. 

It still hurt to know that none of his friends had searched him out. It hurt to know that maybe he was right to think they didn't want him anymore. His chest ached just thinking about the implications. How bad had he been for them to just forget about him that easily? How blind had he been to their feelings that they didn't really care for him anymore? 

He pushed those thoughts away as he laid down in bed for some rest, it wouldn't do to think of those before bed. He'd prefer to have a good night's rest for whatever he planned on doing the next day. 

Good thing he did. 

Dream groaned, his throat becoming scratchy due to the lack of use. It had been days since he's last spoken, not like he needed to speak since he had no one to talk to. He rolled his eyes at the thought. He pushed off the tree and continued on, he swore this was the exact same route he took when he found the herd of sheep and cows shaking his head, he continued to trudge on and felt relief when a clearing appeared.

Except, it wasn't the same clearing he had found cows and sheep in. Instead, he was met with the vast expanse of a plains biome and a beautiful village just nearby. His body tensed when he got closer and heard the sounds of distressed screaming. His leisure pace turned to hurried sprinting as his axe appeared in hand. He internally patted himself on the back for actually bringing his crossbow and shield this time as well. The air shifted and his left arm had a shield equipped while he ran, it almost felt calming and nostalgic to have the heavy weight back. 

He ran face first into the raid and brought his axe down upon a pillager with no mercy. From the looks of it, the raid had just begun and the village wasn't that destroyed yet. When the pillager fell, Dream stretched a hand out to the fallen villager that the monster had attacked. The villager gratefully took it with a familiar grunt and Dream pointed to a house that wasn't surrounded by pillagers. The villager gave a grateful hum before running off. Dream didn't stay back long enough to keep watch as he ran back into battle. 

He missed this. He missed the adrenaline shooting through his veins as he blocked arrow bolts and swung his axe at the assailants. He ducked into a roll as an iron axe came swinging his way and kicked at the Vindicator's feet. The monster dropped down and Dream used this to decapitate him. He continued on like, decapitating and killing any and every pillager his way, prioritizing the ones that were in the middle of attacking an innocent villager. 

He swung his axe one last time and heaved a sigh, watching the last of them fall. He straightened again when he heard another horn, that was just the first wave. He gritted his teeth and gripped his axe tight. He turned to a nearby village who wore priestly robes, a cleric.

"Gather everyone and stay at the furthest house." Dream was surprised at how scratchy and hollow his voice sounded. It didn't carry the same weight or volume as it did before. He could swear it rose in pitch a bit. He blamed it on the fact he doesn't speak as much anymore. "I'll protect the village."

The cleric hummed a concerned tone and Dream tilted his head. Due to the fact he was an admin, he could easily understand the villager despite the lack of words. He hummed back reassuringly, "I can hold my own and your iron golem is still standing. I'll be fine."

The cleric grunted back in resignation before he ran off to find the rest of his village. Dream let out a sigh, adjusting his grip on his axe. He can already hear them and he knows the fight would be a bit harder than before. He grinned as he charged forward, hiding behind his shield as arrows rained from the sky. When the arrows stopped, a sure sign that they were reloading, Dream mentally counted in his head. He had five seconds. 

Fives seconds meant three vindicators laid dead by his feet and the arrows came back with vengeance. He'll just have to deal with the pillagers now. Another five second reload time had two pillagers decapitated. Another one thrown into the air and breaking their bones at the impact. There was one last pillager left and Dream switched to his crossbow and shot him before he could shoot his own arrow. 

That was the second wave down. It'll only get harder from there. Dream gripped his axe tightly and charged again, not waiting for the third wave to even enter the village property. He decapitated the one vindicator that had charged against him and raised his shield for the arrows. The ground shook as a Ravager came charging forward and Dream cursed. He rolled away when he heard the shuffling of a witch nearby. The dark red liquid that splashed in his place indicated a harming potion. He shook his head and faintly heard the Ravager and the iron golem struggling against each other. 

Dream scoffed and reloaded his crossbow, shooting the bolt directly at the witch. The witch stumbled back and died before she could drink a regen potion, the arrow bolt having gone through her skull. Dream waited as another rain of arrows descended. Then there it was, the five seconds. He sprung into action, slashing his sword quickly and efficiently, killing all of the pillagers before they could fully reload. He turned his attention to the Ravager and charged, jumping up and landing on its back. He switched to an iron sword he had crafted and slammed the blade into the Ravager's neck. The animal roared in pain and anger before tilting to the side and dropping dead. 

The next two waves weren't easier. A lucky arrow had punctured his left shoulder but it didn't matter, he can fix it up later. A witch had almost snuck up on him had the iron golem not thrown her into the air, the crunch of her bones breaking giving Dream slight satisfaction. The problem showed itself when the evokers appeared. Dream hissed when he saw the transparent and small bodies of the vexes. He left the golem to deal with the Ravager once again as he charged for the evoker. He'll need to get him out if he wants to fight without annoyances. 

The moment the evoker went down, the rest were easy pickings. He wasn't able to avoid a splash potion of poison from the witch and he had to grit his teeth the rest of the fight but that didn't matter. He'll live. He got another arrow wound to his side and he hissed in pain, stumbling a bit. He cut off the head of the pillager that decided to shoot him and turned his attention to the Ravager. He switched to his crossbow, wincing as he reloaded the arrow bolt. He shot the pillager in the head and moved to take his place. He drove his sword through the Ravager's neck once again, it was the only weak spot for the large tanking animal, and breathed a sigh of relief when it fell. 

Dream groaned, the last dredges of poison finally wearing off as he stumbled amongst the dead bodies. It'll be a day before the bodies fully turn to smoke and ash, decomposing a little quicker than any other body would. Dream kept his shield and brought a hand to press against the arrow wound at his side. The villagers slowly walked out, some of the older villagers moving to loot the bodies before they could disappear. The cleric he had spoken to approached him and helped move him to their little tower-like building. 

He sat on the steps to the church and clutched his wounded side. The two arrows were still sticking out of him when the cleric hummed. Dream winced, realizing the older villager was right. They'll have to pull out the arrows to bandage it. Dream nodded, switching to place some leather between his teeth. He looked at the villager and nodded. 

The cleric took the shaft of the arrow in his hand and pulled. Dream winced, biting down at the leather to stop himself from screaming. The arrow was pulled out and he felt hands pry his own open. He let his hand fall limp and allowed the cleric to bandage his side. He spat out the leather and breathed deeply through his nose. The arrow on his shoulder wasn't that deep and he was able to pull it out himself with a small wince. 

The cleric hummed and bandaged his shoulder as well. Dream ran a hand over the bloodied bandages on his side and flinched. When his shoulder was bandaged, Dream sighed. At least he wasn't completely injured to be immobile. Dream blinked when a light pink potion was shoved into his hands. 

"No, wait- I can't take this--"

The cleric hummed deeply, glaring at him as he continued to pass the potion over. Dream sighed and nodded, taking it and uncorking the bottle. He drank half of it before he corked it back and kept it in his inventory. He smiled his thanks at the cleric. 

"I'll come back to help you rebuild."

The cleric hummed, shaking his head. Dream frowned and opened his mouth to protest but a nearby farmer had approached him and shoved a leather bag at him. Dream blinked in shock, opening the string that tied the bag closed and gaped.

"Wait- but don't you need-"

The farmer hummed back and walked away. Dream looked down. This was exactly what he had needed but he still felt a little bad for taking it when the village was still a bit on edge due to the attack. The leather pouch had seeds of all kinds and a few carrots and potatoes that he can plant to make a farm. Dream looked back up at the cleric who grunted. 

Dream smiled slightly. They were thanking him for saving the village. He shook his head, "You didn't have to but thank you anyways."

Dream grunted as he stood up but the healing potion had worked wonders even if he just drank half. He shifted around a bit before nodding. He won't parkour through the trees for a while but it's no matter, he'll be focused on farming anyways. He nodded at the cleric and moved out, passing by the golem. He noticed how the big beast had a few cracks and nicks here and there. Anymore and the golem might break. Dream smiled and patted the arm of the golem, he'll be back. 

It wasn't long before he reached his home. His humble little cottage that had a small farm house to its left. He smiled and entered the house, placing the pouch on top of some chests and falling into the comfort of his bed. He was going to sleep like a brick that night. 

The next morning saw him creating a little farm behind his cottage. He tilled the land carefully and planted the seeds slowly and properly. He smiled and patted the soil. He was going to grow these crops and find some animals for his farm soon. He continued to plant, ensuring the water reached all the soil and kept it hydrated. Dream leaned back when he finished, the wound on his side and shoulder not that irritated after he finished the healing potion that morning. He wiped the sweat from his forehead and crouched down to look at his farm. He had separated the wheat from the potatoes and the carrots. So far, the seedlings were doing fine. 

Dream stood up and dusted off his pants, he had things to do. 

So what if his farm became fuller with cows, chickens, pigs and sheep. So what if his cottage extended and got two rooms, one for his storage and the other for his kitchen. So what if Dream started sewing new clothes and threw away his old ones entirely. So what if Dream got a little more tan and his voice a little more lighter and higher than before. So what if Dream's hair grew a bit longer than before.

Days turned to weeks. Then the weeks turned to months. 

He enjoyed his simple ~~life in self imposed exile~~ happy life. 

* * *

Tubbo was lost. 

You could argue this was such a big Tubbo moment, Tommy would say the same. Who even gets lost in the middle of the night? 

Tubbo did. He got lost because he ran off. He ran off because he was stressed. He was stressed because Schlatt had just appointed him as Secretary of State. Everything was too wrong. Schlatt wasn't supposed to be president, Tubbo wasn't supposed to betray Tommy and Wilbur and he wasn't supposed to be lost in the wilderness. He kicked a nearby tree and groaned. Why was everything so hard? 

Tubbo sighed and rubbed his arms, the sky was slowly turning dark and everywhere he turned everything looked the same. He huffed and sat on the grass, his stupid suit and tie all ruffled and dirty. He couldn't care less. He never liked the suit anyways. He preferred the L'manberg uniform or his own clothes. Not this stuffy suit that he was forced into since he became the secretary of state. 

He brought his legs to his chest and he stayed under the tree. This was stupid. Everything was stupid. Why couldn't L'manberg just have peace already? Dream had promised them freedom and **he** had stopped antagonizing them. Hell, nowadays **he** was mostly seen around the area and not doing much. It seemed odd and weird but Dream was always like that. No one understood **him**. Sometimes, not even George and Sapnap understood **him** and the two knew him the longest. At the very least, **Dream** stopped visiting L'manberg and actually stayed out like the treaty asked him to.

Tubbo buried his head in his arms and sighed. Maybe he can sleep in the wild and hope that no monster would come and kill him. Ever since they found out that they each only had three lives, they've been more careful about gaining injuries. Especially the L'manberg citizens, since they had all died of overdosed poison from Dream. The older man didn't seem to realize he had overdosed them, merely instructing his team to empty their inventory and leaving. Tubbo thinks that was the fatal mistake. When Dream left, all of the L'manberg citizens had blacked out, the poison being too strong and lasting too long for them to hold on. They had woken up the next day but they all knew they had died and their bodies had to pump out the poison. 

_"It was never meant to be." The words echoing along the man made cave as splash potions of poison drowned the citizens. They choked on their own spit and convulsed as the poison traveled through their veins._

_"Take their items." Dream's cold and heavy voice echoed as well. The unforgiving smiling mask staring them down as they writhed in pain on the floor. The man had abused his admin blood, he had reached into the code and forced their inventories out._

_The floor in the final control room felt colder than the Arctic as they laid there, waiting for their death._

Tubbo felt even more bad about Tommy. His best friend had lost his second life to Dream. He didn't even say anything about dying until Tubbo had managed to see he only had one life left and forced Tommy to tell him where and when he had died. When he found out the true story, he felt so bad. Tommy had done so much for L'manberg and now he was exiled from the very land he had sacrificed his life and discs for. It wasn't fair, really. 

Tubbo stiffened when he heard the groans of zombies and the rattling of the bones of skeletons. He swore he could also hear a distant creeper hiss. He curled up in himself further, shaking in slight fear. He could die right here and right now but who knows if he can wake up in time to not die again. That'd be such an unfortunate death. He'd be all alone and it's be painful as he was ripped to pieces or blown up or punctured with arrows like some pin cushion. 

He shivered as the wind blew and he drew himself up closer. If he could appear smaller then maybe the mobs would ignore him. An arrow landed right beside him and Tubbo let out a strangled scream. He bolted upright, pushing himself away and he ran. He stumbled when an arrow caught his leg and he hissed in pain, stumbling to the ground. He should've brought armor with him, maybe even weapons, but he was stupid and had run off before he could properly equip himself. He was blinded by his emotion and now he was about to die. 

He whimpered when he heard the bowstring of the skeleton pull back one more time and he prepared himself for an eventual death. What he didn't expect was for the skeleton to quiver and fall, the rattling of its bones falling to the floor catching Tubbo's attention. He looked back and noticed a figure carrying a torch and a glowing enchanted netherite axe. The axe looked so familiar but under the torchlight Tubbo couldn't really tell why. 

The figure came closer and Tubbo rushed to crawl away. He didn't know who the figure was and he could possibly die. He hadn't crawled far enough when he was face to face with the feet of a zombie. He screamed and pushed back. He didn't know which was safer, the stranger or the zombie. When the zombie's head fell because of a netherite axe, Tubbo turned to really face the stranger. His eyes widened when he was met with a tanned freckled face with bright green emerald eyes. 

"Uh, hi." Tubbo waved awkwardly, pretending like he hadn't just ran away from his two-time savior. 

The axe disappeared from view and the man merely raised an eyebrow at him. Tubbo swallowed and played with the grass on the ground as he tried to think of something else to say. 

"I'm Tubbo." He blurted out after another bout of silence. 

The man tilted his head and nodded. His eyes were glowing, reflecting the beautiful light of the torch as it crackled. Tubbo wondered idly if the man would speak or if they would end up just staring at each other for the whole night. 

The low hiss of a creeper caused the man's head to jerk up. His emerald eyes turned shark as it scanned the area. The torch disappeared from his hand and they were blanketed in darkness. He felt a rough hand squeeze his shoulder and a low whisper. A low warning to keep quiet. Tubbo kept quiet and listened as a crossbow bolt was loaded and shot. The creeper went out in a dying hiss. 

Tubbo was once again left to think about what to do. He could run but he probably won't get far considering he was both lost and injured. He considered asking the man a question but that seemed rude especially if he wasn't sure if the man could talk or not. Tubbo didn't want to be rude to the one person who had saved him. Even if the man had the ability to kill him right now, he felt much safer than all the other monsters in the dark. He could also-

"-bo?"

Tubbo flinched, realizing the man had spoken. He turned to look at the man who had brought out the torch again. Tubbo was glad for the light, it helped him to see who exactly he was talking to and made him feel safer. 

"Yeah?"

"Why are you here?" 

The man's voice was slightly familiar but it sounded too high pitched, too light for it to be the voice of anyone Tubbo knew. Plus, he hadn't seen the man's face. Tubbo was sure he didn't recognize this man. No one had such vibrant emerald green eyes and a splatter of freckles. No one even had that long of blonde hair. 

"I- I got lost." Tubbo admitted. 

The man nodded before holding out a hand. Tubbo hesitantly room it, stumbling as he was pulled up. He winced, reminded of the arrow wound on his leg. He unconsciously leaned into the older man as he tried to shift the weight off his injured leg. 

"I have a cottage nearby." The man cleared his throat. His voice sounded like the man hadn't used it in a long while. "You can stay with me during the night and I can help you find your way back."

Tubbo let out a relieved sigh. A house sounded good. It was better than staying out in the dark with monsters crawling everywhere. He nodded and the man helped him walk as he offered a hand. Tubbo followed him before realizing he didn't even know the man's name.

"Who are you?"

There was a long stretch of silence and Tubbo almost regretted it. Did he sound rude? Was it too much? The man was already letting him stay in his house. Maybe he didn't have a name or he was uncomfortable with it. 

After a whole minute of fretting and debating whether or not he should apologize, the man finally spoke. 

"...Clay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I oop. 
> 
> More world building notes (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧
> 
> \+ in the smp, a person's lives are shown through a small screen said person can pull up to check or keep track of  
> \+ ghosts happen when you use up all your lives in a world but if you jump worlds, you will be tangible again (losing memories is a glitch)  
> \+ demons are a glitch in the code of the worlds and aren't supposed to exist, they don't shed blood but turn into goop when injured  
> \+ hybrids are also a glitch in the code but not during birth, more like you are attached to smth too much that it kinda became a part of you i.e. Philza having wings bc he keeps using an elytra the code glitches the elytra to be a part of him  
> \+ Commands are done by reaching into the very code itself (only admins can do this) and changing it  
> \+ Demons use dark magic and not code but they can replicate many things that admins can do, sometimes they are mistaken as admins  
> \+ MCC happens but it's yearly instead of monthly cause of the process of world jumping  
> \+ Death messages still appear but they show up in the communicator. The person has to be holding the communicator for it to process and send out the message
> 
> \+ Villagers have a language only admins can understand, anyone else would only hear hums, grunts and the like.
> 
> (These notes and the chapter itself have a lil easter egg (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧ everything is done for a reason)


	3. A Chance Encounter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He had already stepped back from their life-- 
> 
> So why did he want them back?

Dream didn't know what to feel about the young teen who was leaning against him. He didn't know why he was even leading him to his house. Hell, he didn't even know why he had said his name was Clay! Even if it was clear the teen hadn't recognized him, maybe his hair and voice was too different, it still didn't mean he should let him into his home. 

Even with these thoughts, a little part of him whispered about the many wrongs he had committed to the teen. How he had stolen away his childhood and fun. How it was his fault for not doing better, for being better. 

_Dream had promised to be better and only hell can make him change his mind now._

So, with a set goal in mind, Dream helped Tubbo through the forest until they came to Dream's lit up little area. He hadn't wanted monsters coming close to his home so he had ensured it was well lit. He never really enjoyed walking out at night, preferring to sleep in his nice little home. Tonight was different. He was restless the whole day and he felt dread settle at the bottom of his stomach, so he had gone and walked to clear his mind. Killed a few zombies and skeletons here and there while shooting down the creepers before they could come close enough to his home. 

He was glad that he had chosen to have a walk. Had he not gone out, Tubbo would've been dead. Sweet, innocent Tubbo who was constantly dragged into conflicts. Tubbo who was all ruffled up and wearing a suit. 

**_That felt wrong._ **

Dream pushed open the door and let Tubbo inside, pulling a chair he had made over and letting the teen sit down. He walked to his storage room and grabbed some bandages and a healing potion that he had gotten from the village through trades. He walked back into the main room and watched with a smile as Tubbo looked around in awe.

"Did you- did you build all this?" Tubbo turned to him, eyes wide with wonder. 

Dream nodded, kneeling down and carefully ripping the pants leg off. He inspected the wound and grabbed a piece of cloth, wiping the blood away. He took the shaft of the arrow and pulled. Tubbo had winced but didn't let out any sound other than a whimper. The arrow wasn't deep but it would hurt to take out nonetheless. 

Dream wiped the blood away again before he wrapped the bandage around it. He tightened it a bit before tying it at the end. He hummed and tapped Tubbo's knees. The teen looked at him as he handed him a potion. Tubbo took it hesitantly. 

"You don't have to-"

"It's fine." Dream waved his hand. He can always find a cave to build a Nether portal. He was meaning to start brewing potions himself for a while now. This incident just further solidified his need of keeping stock of potions. 

He watched as Tubbo looked down at the potion before hesitantly uncorking it. The teen gulped half of it down before stopping and closing the bottle. Tubbo moved to give it to him when Dream shook his head. The teen looked uncomfortable before he kept it in his inventory. 

They sat in silence as Dream stood back up and moved into the kitchen. He had left some pork chop to cook while he had gone out and he was sure they were finished by now. Washing out his hands, he grabbed the cooked food and walked back out to the main room. When Tubbo was still sitting there, Dream sighed in relief. The teen wasn't stupid enough to run away. 

Dream sat down across from Tubbo and handed him a pork chop with a porcelain plate. The teen's eyes widened as he blinked and stared at the cooked food. Dream snorted which caught his attention. He gestured at the food and Tubbo hesitantly reached out. While Tubbo was chewing, Dream eyed what the teen was wearing. It was a suit with a green tie. 

That itself was odd. He knew the teen always wore loose clothing, even his L'manberg uniform was more open than this stuffy suit. He frowned, tapping a finger against the table. What happened to his lands to cause Tubbo to wear a suit? What happened to cause Tubbo to even get lost in the first place? Actually, the better question was **_where was Tommy?_**

Tubbo must've caught his frown cause the teen shifted in his seat, "Is something… wrong?"

"You seem uncomfortable." Dream merely responded, pushing his concerns to the back of his mind. Right now, Tubbo was his concern. "Is it the suit?"

Tubbo swallowed, picking at the top of the wood table, "I- yeah… it's a bit stuffy."

Dream hummed, nodding. He stood up and walked back into his storage room. He remembered the first time he tried sewing a new sweater for himself and ended up with something smaller than him. He grabbed the soft, blue cloth from one of the chests and walked back out. He extended it to Tubbo.

The teen looked like he was looking at gold. He looked up at Dream, a question in his eyes. Dream smiled back and nodded, pushing the sweater into the teen's hands. The teen grinned before he looked down and fiddled with the soft cloth. Dream tapped his finger on the table, gaining the teen's attention. He pointed at the storage room before he nodded.

Tubbo gave him a grateful smile, limping a bit towards the room. Dream observed his limp, the potion was working wonders it seems. He nodded and sat down, waiting for the teen to leave the room. Once he did, Tubbo had his polo, suit and tie in his arms and the sweater fit the teen perfectly. Dream smiled and gestured for him to come over. 

Tubbo grinned and sat down, sitting right beside the older man instead of across. Drama hummed and patted his head, "Mind telling me why you were lost in the woods… in a suit and alone?"

They weren't exactly the questions in his mind but these were important over everything. Dream watched and waited as Tubbo fiddled with the sleeves of the sweater. The teen looked uncomfortable, not at the question but at the answer no doubt. Dream didn't push, he just wanted to know what happened. He's been out of his lands for a few months already (or was it a year?), it's possible that so much could change at that time. So, he waited until Tubbo was fine with spilling everything out or if he just wanted to remain silent. 

"Well, you see-" Tubbo paused, as if wondering how to word something properly. "There was just so much stress and expectations and I wanted to get away."

Dream hummed and nodded. He, too, did that. That's why he lived in this quaint little clearing with his farm and his cottage.

"I just- I felt so bad. Schlatt… he forced me to be part of his cabinet and now I can't even find where Tommy and Wilbur ran off to." Tubbo let out a harsh sigh. "That and I have to wear a stupid suit. It… it's not going great."

Dream stared at Tubbo, his mind whirling with questions. Where did Tommy and Wilbur run off to? Why is there a cabinet? Why was Schlatt in charge? What had happened when he left?

Tubbo might've noticed how his face twisted in confusion and concern as he groaned, "I'm not making any sense, am I?" 

Dream shook his head, giving a placating smile, "It's fine. You can rant all you want."

Tubbo gave back a relieved smile, "Thank you."

He only nodded in response, his smile turning reassuring. Tubbo looked down, playing with the rolled up tie in his hands. He looked to be sorting through his thoughts, choosing what needs to be said or not. Before long, Tubbo took a deep breath and let it out. 

"I- I live in a country called L'manberg." He began. Dream nodded along, showing that he was listening. "We got our freedom a year ago. It was… it was a big fight but we won. We finally got our freedom."

The way Tubbo spoke about it made him feel light and heavy at the same time. He was glad he actually gave L'manberg their freedom instead of being selfish and taking it away. The citizens fought well and Dream won't undermine their efforts. It was nice to hear that they were going great. 

"We built a lot of stuff." Tubbo chuckled fondly. Dream smiled at that. "Tommy, my best friend, built a reverse coaster thing? I built a courtroom too!" 

Dream chuckled. That did sound fun and hilarious at the same time. Plus, a _reverse coaster_? What was the gremlin child thinking? Still, he felt more amused as Tubbo continued to speak about his country. 

"It was great! Then Wilbur, uh… Tommy's brother and our general during the war. He- he wanted an election. He was running for President and Tommy was his running mate for Vice President." Tubbo continued, his tone slowly dropping in excitement. 

Dream tilted his head. A democratic government? That didn't sound right. He thought L'manberg was a free country. He had thought they wouldn't fall into the dark abyss of politics. He should've known better. All countries have fallen down that path sooner or later. The first sign was their little declaration. Still, it was their country and he didn't have any say in it. He didn't have any say in anything anymore, he left that life a year ago when he ran away. 

"Yeah, it… at first everyone knew the clear winner." Tubbo waved his hands around, "It was obviously Wilbur and Tommy. No one even dared to run against them. That was… that was until Quackity and George did."

Dream blinked. George? When was the man even dragged into L'manberg? Last he checked, George had fought with him against L'manberg. Did the citizens just… welcome him? Allowed him to run? Dream frowned, that didn't sound right at all.

"George, he uh- he was from the opposing side but Quackity, another citizen, just… dragged him along? That was when the Pog and Swag parties began fighting." Tubbo picked at the wood nervously. "Then, uh- Fundy and Niki made a party as well but it… it wasn't as big of a fight as Swag and Pog."

"Who won?" Dream tilted his head. This entire thing sounded wrong. Maybe he should've stayed? Keep everything under control? He reared himself back. 

**No, he was never in control. He needed to remember that.**

"Uh… that's when the problems started. Schlatt, the-uh another guest and Quackity made a coalition government." Tubbo swallowed. "They- they won by 1% more votes than Wilbur and Tommy."

Dream sighed. A coalition government, huh. That sounded way more complicated than he had expected. Still, it didn't sound that bad. Maybe Wilbur and Tommy were throwing a tantrum and ran off when they lost. Still didn't explain why Tubbo was forced to stay. 

"Schlatt won. He's the president now. He- the first thing he did as president was exile Wilbur and Tommy from L'manberg." Tubbo sniffed. "They- they ran off into the wild and I don't know where they are. I tried to follow but Schlatt made me his Secretary of State."

Dream forced himself to not react too much. Wilbur and Tommy exiled? Tommy, who had sacrificed his discs for L'manberg, was exiled. That… that was even worse than Dream thought. He was dumbfounded. This was all wrong. 

"And yeah… that's why I'm in the woods, all alone." Tubbo chuckled, leaning back and rubbing the back of his neck. "I- I got a bit overwhelmed by everything and wanted some time to think. Should've… should've realized that it was dangerous."

"That's valid." Dream stated, the first time he had spoken throughout Tubbo's rant. "I- next time you want somewhere safe to stay and talk about your problems, you can come here."

He knew he shouldn't. He knew he really shouldn't. He had run away to get out of their lives. Why was he inviting them back into his life? Why was he bringing them back? Did he really miss them so much? This would just end badly for him so why? 

He pushed these thoughts back and smiled at Tubbo reassuringly. If he wanted to help them, might as well do it in the shadows. Might as well help them in a way that doesn't have him dictating their every move. Might as well help them by offering them some comfort, a way out of whatever they feel like is too much. He wasn't going to reach out to them and dabble in their politics, but he'll help them if they reach out to him. 

He might not be able to provide weapons or supplies but he can provide a safe haven. A place they can feel safe in. A home they can confide in. A person they can trust. He was going to provide them with everything they need and not what he thinks they need. He's going to wait for them to come to him and not force himself into their lives. He wanted to help. 

Tubbo smiled at him, his whole body relaxing, "Thank you, _Clay_."

For a start, Dream almost jerked in his seat. He gave a shaky smile at Tubbo. 

Right, he didn't introduce himself as Dream. No wonder Tubbo was so open to him. No wonder Tubbo was so relaxed. He wasn't Dream right now. He wasn't the intimidating and cruel ruler of his lands. He was Clay. The stranger who lives in a small cottage and saved Tubbo from the monsters. He wasn't Dream in his green hoodie and porcelain mask. He was Clay with his soft lime sweater and long braided hair. He wasn't Dream who hid his emotions and always demanded things. He was Clay who offered a listening ear to his struggles and offered him a safe place to run off to. 

_He wasn't Dream to Tubbo. He was only Clay._

"Of course." Dream choked out, "You're always welcome."

The rest of the night, Dream offered his bed for Tubbo to sleep in. The teen had refused vehemently, feeling bad that he was taking the man's home as his own. Dream merely chuckled and assured him that it was fine. When the teen was fast asleep, the events of the day finally catching up to him, Dream sat outside with his axe in his lap. 

He ran a thumb along the blade as it glowed. This weapon has been with him for quite a while. It has helped him against many monsters and spilled so much blood. It was so easily recognizable what with the engraved name across the blade glowing to show everyone who exactly it belonged to. _Nightmare_. A direct opposite of his name, a threat to those who defy him. He sighed and let the blade touch the ground. Anyone who saw his axe would recognize it immediately, it was a miracle that everything was too dark for Tubbo to really see it properly. 

He debated on shoving it in the chest along with his mask and hoodie. Same with his crossbow. Despite how important the two were to him, if he were to expect visitors from his lands he can't have them recognizing him through his weapons. He shook his head. He already distanced himself from them, he didn't want to come barging back into their lives after what he did. He let the axe fade back to his inventory, leaning back against the walls of his home. He'll have to bury it along with the rest of his things. Finally cutting off the last part of his past self and embracing this new life. 

He slipped back into the house, looking at the sleeping form of Tubbo. He knelt against the one block of wood that hid the chest filled with his old things. He carefully cut it away and opened the chest inside. He shoved his axe and crossbow inside. He can get new ones, preferably ones without any indication of his past life. He closed the chest and replaced the wooden plank. That was it. He finally and successfully cut himself off from his past life. His past mistakes. 

He took a deep breath and let it out. He felt so free. It was like a heavy weight had lifted off his shoulder. He slumped and grinned. Still, he'll need weapons. He eyed his ender chest and scooted over. He had promised himself not to use most of his items there, wanting to live a simpler life without much complications. Taking three diamonds and one enchanted book, Dream turned to his crafting table and anvil. He broke both of them and walked out. If he wanted to work he'll do it outside where he won't bother Tubbo. 

He set the crafting table and anvil down. He scanned the edges of the clearing, eyeing the monsters shuffling along in the darkness. He'll have to work fast. He set to creating the axe, watching as it glowed a bright white before appearing as a beautiful diamond axe. The blade looked sharp and unused, not at all chipped like his netherite axe. He took it in his hands, weighing it for a moment. He gripped the handle and hummed. He'll have to wrap some cloth around parts of it so he could get an easy grip of it. 

He set the blade against the anvil and begun to set the enchantments on it. He only had a book of Unbreaking. He'll have to visit the village again for more enchantments. The village. Dream smiled as he thought of the village he had saved. It was a beautiful village and he had befriended the entire population of villagers. 

_Like Dream had promised, he'd gone back to the village. This time, he had brought with him his pickaxe and a few more materials. He walked into the area and greeted all the villagers there with a smile and a wave. Then, he came upon the cleric who had helped him with his wounds. The villager was busy checking over the iron golem as it had a few cracks here and there from the fight. Dream frowned as he looked at the golem. It had fought well and even helped Dream against the raid._

_He waved at the villager and placed a hand on his shoulder, "I'm back."_

_The villager hummed disapprovingly. Dream chuckled and patted his shoulder, "No, no. I'm fine. The potion you gave me worked wonders."_

_Still, the villager looked on at him disapprovingly. Dream grinned, looking at the golem. He eyed the cracks and chips in it's body and hummed. The cleric must've caught his stare and hummed._

_"It's easy plus you have a blacksmith." Dream reassured. He looked around, "I'll just mine the iron myself. I needed to go find a cave system for my own supplies anyways."_

_He turned and left before the cleric could scold him some more. He chuckled when he heard a loud grunt and waved in return. He had noticed a small opening just a few blocks away from the general area of the village. He ducked his way into the cave and lit a torch. He grinned to himself as he began exploring._

_When he walked back out, it was sunrise. He shook his head and kept his torch in his inventory. He made his way to the village, wiping his dusty hands against his turtleneck. He'll need to get some new clothes soon. He hummed as he walked towards the village, a bright and content smile on his face. He had found a good chunk of iron fit for both himself and the iron golem of the village._

_He walked to the village, seeing the golem patrol the areas. He grinned and jogged over to the golem, rapping his knuckles against the golem's arms. The large, hulking beast looked down at him, creaking with every movement. Dream pointed at the blacksmith and let some iron ingots show in his hand. The iron golem nodded and walked towards the building, it's steps causing the ground to shake a bit._

_Dream jogged over to the main building and tapped the shoulder of the cleric. The villager turned back and hummed inquiringly._

_"I'll fix up your golem." Dream hummed. "That's all I'll do for today but expect me to visit every now and again. Maybe help tend to your crops as well."_

_The cleric grunted and Dream laughed. He was doing too much for a village that he had saved but Dream enjoyed this. He liked helping people. Either way, he didn't have anything else to do. At least, not yet._

_Dream made his way to the blacksmith and shoved some iron ingots into the furnaces. He had already smelted the ores when he was in the cave but he'll need to heat it up again to fix up the golem. He watched as the golem lied down after his instructions. He hummed as he thanked his admin blood for the ability to communicate easily with the natural habitants of the world. He pulled on gloves as he carried a pot filled with boiling and molten iron and carefully poured it over the cracks of the golem. He watched as the liquid metal flowed slowly and filled the large crack in the golem's chest._

_He stopped before it overflowed and moved to another crack along the golem's arm. When he finished filling the cracks in the front of the golem, he waited for it to harden. He shoved the pot back into the burning furnace and leaned against the wall. He watched as the iron slowly hardened to the open air, tilting his head in wonder. He got back to work when the iron hardened and the golem turned around slowly. Dream hummed to himself as he continued to fill up the gaps. When he finished and the iron hardened, he patted the golem and grinned at his work._

_He watched as the golem lumbered away and let the leftover iron harden back into nuggets. He handed them over to the blacksmith despite his protests._

_"It's fine. See it as a gift." He smiled and patted the villager's shoulder. He waved and left the village itself, travelling back to his home._

Dream chuckled as he finished enchanting his new axe. He had also used a few bit of his experience to engrave a name for the axe. This time, it wasn't intimidating of any sort. He blew at the excess metal and admired his work. Peace. That's what he named his newest axe. He'll have to find some books for sharpness and the like. Maybe he'll consider making an enchanting room for his basement or something. He chuckled and brought the crafting table and anvil back inside. 

**_He was content with this life of his._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AND I OOP!!
> 
> Iron golem mechanics go b r r 
> 
> Heehee ;)
> 
> UPDATED IN COMMEMORATION OF DREAM STREAMING AGAIN!!! AWOOGA AWOOGA
> 
> ((Also btw, I won't refer to Dream as Clay but the other characters will be calling him that since he didn't want anyone to know he was Dream! So, yeah!! Hopefully y'all don't feel that weird with it since it's his real name but ye))


	4. Hobbies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A friend is nice to have around the clearing...
> 
> Maybe he'll make more.

The next day saw Dream cooking some steak for the two. While it cooked, he decided to look at a book the village's baker had given him. He knew a lot of skills to survive but that was it, it was only to survive so it was the most basic of knowledge. He could cook a good steak and make some okay bread but other than that he doesn't really know anything more. He even had a bit of a hard time making his sweaters. While he knew how to patch up clothes, he didn't know how to make some. So, it was a journey for him. 

_The first time Dream decided to make new clothes, he was at the village. He had asked for some help from the few villagers who knew how to make clothes. While he got the basic idea down, he struggled with the scaling. He deadpanned as he held up a much smaller dark blue sweater. The villagers around him exchanged amused grunts with one another. Dream chuckled and kept it in his inventory. He'll just keep it, for memories._

_He tried again and came up with a lime green sweater. He tried it on and noticed the sleeves were a bit longer but he chuckled. This'll do. He continued to make more, sewing together the soft cloth to make more sweaters. The villager suggested knitting and Dream sweatdropped. He assured them he'll try it later on. The villagers didn't look at all pleased and insisted._

_So he learned knitting. He knitted sweaters and when he looked at the beautiful beige sweater he blinked. It looked better and less wonky. He chuckled, "Thank you."_

_The villagers hummed one last advice. Dream let out an understanding tone and nodded, "I see… sweaters are better made with knitting and other clothes like pants and jumpers are good for sewing…"_

_Dream ran a thumb over the soft knitting of the sweater and smiled. He liked this. He ended up trading for large quantities of colored cloth from the village and running off. He'll learn how to spin thread into cloth later. He grinned as he brought the clothes to his face. He finally made something!_

Dream was glad he had kept the blue sweater even if it was smaller. It had come in handy when Tubbo visited. He jumped a bit when there was a knock behind him. He grinned and waved when Tubbo shyly entered with a small smile. The teen had brightened when he caught sight of the book in his hands. 

"Are you… baking?" He asked with a small tilt to his head.

"I'm trying to figure it out." Dream rubbed the back of his neck. "I haven't really tried it yet."

"I can help you!" Tubbo grinned, coming over. "I know the basics… Niki, a friend, can bake better than me though. She has a bakery too! I learned from her." 

Dream nodded along to the teen's little rant. Tubbo took the offered book and flipped through the pages. He considered for a moment and Dream blinked, "Is something wrong?" 

"Do you have sugar and pumpkins?" Tubbo asked.

Dream hummed and brought out two pumpkins from his chest. He had gotten the seeds from trading in the village and he made a small pumpkin farm outside along with his sugar canes and other crops. Tubbo brightened and nodded. 

"Great! I'll teach you how to make some pumpkin pie!" 

Dream chuckled and nodded. He took out the supplies, following Tubbo's instruction. The teen could teach well, he noted. He could make a good teacher if he wanted to. Dream hummed and watched as Tubbo showed him how the measurements worked and told him about baking times. 

"They're tricky cause you'll have to heat the furnace ahead of time." Tubbo explained. "Then when you shove the batter in, you'll increase the heat by just a little bit!" 

Dream nodded, keeping note of everything the teen was saying. While baking wasn't necessarily a survival skill, he wasn't trying to survive anymore. He just wanted to live and he found out creating things made him feel so alive. Much more alive compared to when he destroyed and annihilated. 

After a few skirmishes and flour exploding into the air, they emerged with a decent pumpkin pie. Dream grinned as Tubbo brought the steaming plate outside. He had taken the steak out and placed them in plates as well, bringing them out. He handed one plate to Tubbo and kept his own. 

The two sat across each other and ate their breakfast. Dream noticed Tubbo staring at him and he looked up, raising an eyebrow. The teen caught his eye and he yelped a bit, giving a nervous chuckle.

"Sorry, you just seemed familiar." 

Dream stiffened. He swallowed the steak in his mouth and hoped his voice didn't crack when he asked, "How so?"

"Oh! You remind me of Dream. Uh… he's the leader of the opposing side." Tubbo cleared his throat, picking at his steak. "He's a bit cruel and stuff but yeah."

"Right." Dream cleared his throat. "How do I- how do I seem familiar?" 

"Oh, you- you both have blonde hair I guess?" Tubbo shrugged. "But you look really different. More tan than him… that and we've never really seen his face so yeah. That and your hair is long and- are those flowers?"

Dream grinned, "Yeah, I have a little sister so I know how to braid my hair with flowers." 

Tubbo's eyes widened and he looked giddy, "That's so cool! Teach me!" 

Dream chuckled and nodded, "Sure. After we take a piece of our pumpkin pie."

"Yes!" 

The two got their slices and Dream practically melted at the taste. Tubbo giggled at his end, noticing his obvious satisfaction. Dream grinned and shoved another piece into his mouth, savoring the sweet taste.

"I guess that's another difference." Tubbo mused. 

"Hm?" Dream looked up.

"You're so expressive and… open! Like, I can trust you with everything!" Tubbo grinned. "Plus, I don't think Dream would ever want to settle down like this… he seems so used to the chase. Like he's always living on the edge. He never seemed like a person who would enjoy the quiet life and do stuff like… this."

Dream felt a pang of hurt flash through him. Was that how he showed himself back then? Was he such an unapproachable character? Was he that cold and intimidating? Did he scare all of them? He breathed through his nose and smiled at Tubbo. That was in the past. This was now. He was different from that. He was approachable, kinder. He was living instead of surviving. 

"That's… a sad life." Dream settled on saying instead. 

"It is." Tubbo agreed, his smile dropping a bit. "Maybe if he chose to settle down or something…"

Dream swallowed. He did. He chose to run away. He picked a secluded and small life now. He was finally at peace. 

"Well, you said you wanted to learn how to braid flowers into one's hair." Dream switched the subject. "I'll let you try it out on my hair, come on. I have a garden of flowers outside."

Tubbo brightened at that once more. He finished his slice of pie and followed Dream outside. Dream led him to a small patch of flowers he had grown and tended to. He sat in the middle and picked a few flowers up. He still had seeds to spare anyways. He gestured for Tubbo to come close. 

"You want to untangle my hair?"

"You're letting me touch your hair?" Tubbo's eyes widened. 

Dream chuckled and nodded, "Go ahead."

Tubbo grinned and moved to his back. Dream hummed as he felt a hand card through his hair. It was calming. He smiled to himself as he remembered the moment his hair had grown. 

_Dream blinked when he bent down to tend to his farm. Strands of his hair had fallen into his face. He frowned for a moment, turning to his iron hoe to check his reflection. His hair had fallen in soft locks around his face, framing it. It had grown to reach up to brush his shoulders and he chuckled. He stood up and walked to a tree. He chipped at the bark and grabbed some twine. He tied the two ends together and used it to tie his hair back._

_The next time he had checked his hair length, it landed in the middle of his back. He rolled his eyes and tied it back in a rat tail. He brushed his hair back and went back to tending to his farm again._

Now, his hair had stopped around his thighs and he had to put it up in a bun or a braid to get it out of the way. He didn't want to cut it, preferring the longer hair. It made him a little more different than before. He grinned when he felt the hands stop combing through his hair. 

He handed a flower to Tubbo, "Do you know how to braid hair?"

"A bit, yeah." Tubbo nodded. 

"Well, just braid it and after a while, you can braid in the stem of the flower." Dream explained.

Tubbo hummed as he took locks of Dream's hair and twisted them along. Dream recognized the type of braid he was doing. It was a fishtail braid. He chuckled at that information. He never tried doing a fishtail braid, finding it tiring due to the length of his hair. He stayed still and handed some flowers to the teen. It wasn't long before Tubbo stopped. Dream tilted his head and realized his hair was a little shorter that when he had normally braided it. 

"You did well." Dream praised, running a gentle hand over the twisting knots of his hair. 

"Thanks!" Tubbo leaned against him. Dream chuckled and showed the flower crown he had made while the teen was braiding his hair. Tubbo gasped and bent his head a bit lower to allow Dream to place the crown on his head. "This is beautiful."

"Keep it." Dream smiled, patting his head. "You can keep the sweater as well."

"But- But I can't." Tubbo shook his head. 

"Nope. It's yours now." Dream chuckled. "Take care of it." 

"But I want to come back." Tubbo pouted. "I'll need a reason to come back!"

Dream snorted and let out a controlled laugh. The teen laughed alongside him and the two fell back into the grassy fields. They laid there for a moment, enjoying the silence and each other's company. Dream opened his mouth to comment before Tubbo jolted at the sound of the communicator. 

Dream blinked and looked towards the teen, raising an eyebrow. The teen gave back a sheepish smile and brought out a familiar looking communicator. Tubbo fumbled with it before answering it. 

"Tubbo!! Big T!" Tommy's voice echoed through the field. 

Tubbo held a relieved smile and Dream chuckled fondly, remembering the other teen's exuberance. They sat up and Dream pulled his legs close to his chest, leaning his head against his knees as he watched Tubbo. 

"Tommy!" Tubbo sighed, glad he could hear his best friend's voice.

"You're not with anyone, right?" Tommy chuckled nervously. "I didn't fuck up?"

"No, no. It's fine." Tubbo reassured. "I'm not even in Manberg!" 

"Wait, what!?" Tommy screeched. "Are you- are you actually looking for me?"

"I am!" Tubbo smiled before backpedaling. "I mean! Not because of Schlatt! I was worried for you, Tommy." 

There was a relieved laugh, "Same to you too, Big T."

"How's… how's everything? How's Wilbur?" Tubbo asked hesitantly.

"We're doing fine. We found a ravine and named it Pogtopia!" Tommy let out a cackle. There was a pause before his tone turned somber, "Wilbur got shot in his shoulder and he's still healing but- but! Good news! We managed to contact Techno to come over!"

Dream jerked his head up, blinking at that. He knew Technoblade from their many competitions and the Championships. It was a yearly event that Dream sat out this year. He wondered how the other man had done in that Championship. Dream knew he was missing out on a lot but he preferred it this way. It wasn't like he stopped fighting either, he just preferred going against multiple monsters than anything. 

Either way, he had allowed a lot of other people onto his world except they just didn't enter the world yet. He shrugged, either way whoever the rest would invite is fine with him. It's their world now, even if he was the one with admin blood. He continued to watch as Tubbo animatedly spoke with his best friend. He smiled slightly at the sight, he missed seeing the two of them talking to each other and having fun. 

"-you anyways?" 

"Oh! I got lost last night." Tubbo admitted sheepishly. 

"That's such a Tubbo moment." Tommy mused, chuckling. 

"But- but! I found this really cool guy! He's Clay!" Tubbo explained.

Dream stiffened, blinking in shock. He didn't think Tubbo would say anything to Tommy. Though he should have expected this, they were best friends. They never kept secrets from each other. He missed those days with Sapnap and George. 

"What!?" Tommy shrieked from the other end. "How are you they're safe-"

"He killed all the monsters! He even helped me with my wound and gave me a sweater so I didn't have to wear the stuffy suit!" 

Dream chuckled at Tubbo, "Don't forget that we baked some killer pumpkin pie and you learned how to braid flowers into my hair."

"Who the fuck was that?" Tommy demanded. 

Tubbo giggled and scooted closer to Dream, "It's Clay! Say hi! Clay, this is Tommy!"

"Hello Tommy." Dream chuckled.

"Damn, his voice is high and raspy as fuck." Tommy exclaimed. 

Dream rolled his eyes fondly, "Guess that's what happens when I'm alone and have no one to talk to."

Tubbo snapped his head to stare at Dream, "What?"

"What?" Tommy echoed from the communicator.

Dream blinked and tilted his head, "Yeah?"

"I'm visiting you again." Tubbo huffed. 

"You don't have to-"

"I will." Tubbo insisted. 

"Tubbo… what about Schlatt?" Tommy cut in. 

Tubbo stiffened, eyes widening when he realized what time it was. He shot up and almost stumbled back down had Dream not steadied his arm, standing up alongside him. The older man looked concerned as Tubbo fumbled with his communicator.

"I'll call you later, Tommy." Tubbo muttered. He didn't wait for Tommy to respond before he cut off the call. He turned to Dream with wide and pleading eyes. "I have to go."

"Wait," Dream placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, "let me lead you back. You might get lost."

"I- thank you." Tubbo shakily took a breath. 

Tubbo hurried back to the cottage with Dream following with a slower pace. He was worried for the teen. When Tommy had mentioned Schlatt, he had paled and shook a bit. The older man wasn't hurting Tubbo, was he? 

Dream blinked when Tubbo had appeared in the door, wearing the suit again. The teen gave a shaky smile as he hugged his torso, "I'm ready."

Dream shook his head and walked in, taking three slices of the pie they made and packing it for the teen. He noted how the teen had folded the sweater and placed his flower crown on top. He took the flower crown and walked back out. 

He plopped the flower crown back on top of the teen's head, handing him the packed pie. Tubbo gaped at him, bringing a hesitant hand over the flowers.

"But-"

"It's fine. I made it for you." Dream playfully poked him in the chest. "It'll do no good wilting here without you."

Tubbo then looked down at the pie. He looked back up at him with wide eyes, "The pie-"

"I can always make more for myself." Dream assured. He passed the pie to the teen and due to his shock he accepted it. Dream chuckled and ruffled his hair, careful not to damage the flower crown. He looped an arm around Tubbo's shoulder and led him towards the area that he found the teen. 

They walked in relative silence. Dream hummed a little tune as he looked around, his eyes gleaming at the sights all around him. He smiled and nudged Tubbo. 

"Well, this is where I last found you." Dream stated, "Do you know where to go from here?"

"Oh, I- yeah!" Tubbo smiled thankfully. "I have the coordinates in my communicator. Thank you."

"Stay safe, kid." Dream patted his head. He waved at the teen as he ran off, keeping the pie in his inventory while doing so. 

When he was sure Tubbo was out of sight and safe, he let out a sigh and let his hand fall. He turned back and walked to his cottage. When he was back to his brightly lit area, the sun almost setting, he pondered for a moment. If he was going to have Tubbo over a lot, then he'll need to expand his house. His eyes sparkled as a thought hit him. 

_Tubbo liked bees, didn't he?_

Dream chuckled to himself as he walked into the cottage. When the sun rises tomorrow, he'll go and find the beehive that he stumbled upon when he was exploring. He had enough flowers to be able to transport the bees safely and without harming them. He also had his silk touch diamond pickaxe that he had enchanted after trading with the villagers for the enchanted book. He picked up the blue sweater and moved it to a separate chest in his storage room. He paused and looked around the room. 

If he was extending his home for those injured and hurt, he might have to rework his interior. He shook his head and closed the door. He'll do that later. He moved to his bed and pulled the covers over himself. He'll sleep early, having not slept the entire night when Tubbo was here. 

The next day, Dream stretched and sat up. He looked around his little cottage and stood up from his bed. He ruffled his hair and walked to his storage area. He changed his clothes, wearing a beige sweater he had knitted and pulling on a dark brown skirt that fell just below his knees and above his ankles. While he had a few jumpers here and there, he had more skirts due to how much easier and less expensive it was to sew them. He bent down and pulled on some leather boots he had gotten from the village. He grabbed a small straw hat from the side and pulled out his silk touch pickaxe. 

He walked out, covering his eyes from the rays of the sun as it rose. He grinned and set off to the little clearing that he knew flowers had grown. He peeked around the corner and smiled. There was one beehive there. He chuckled and walked into the clearing. He watched as the bees buzzed curiously as he walked over, the flowers in his hair attracting them. He let them follow him, sniffing at his hair as he carefully broke the beehive. 

It fell to the ground and he picked it up. He looked at the bees as they followed him. He hummed as he realized he didn't need a leash to bring them over. He walked back to his home, humming along to the soft buzzing around him. He looked at his clearing and mapped everything out in his head. He grinned when he found the perfect place. He set down a plank of wood and placed the beehive on top of it. He had placed it close to his garden of flowers. This'll both help his flowers to bloom and for the beehives to grow. 

He left the bees to curiously poke around at the flowers and walked into his house. He grabs some flower seeds. He walked back out, kneeling by his flower patch. He pulled at the weeds that decided to grow around them slowly and carefully. Once he finished, he laid out the seeds beside him as he dug the dirt with his hands. He made a small long hole and set down the seeds. He buried them with his hands, patting at the dirt to ensure it was levelled. 

He looked up at the beehive and grinned when it looked to have honey practically spilling out. He chuckled and brought out his shears, approaching the beehive carefully. He stopped before he facepalmed. He forgot to do something. He shook his head, turning around and back to his home. He made a simple campfire and some carpets and went back out. 

He broke the beehive with his silk touch pickaxe once more and replaced the wooden block with a campfire and the carpet. He made a little tower for the beehive to hang from and nodded. This'll do for now. He'll have to fix it up a bit later when he has more beehives and knows where to put them. He nodded to himself, keeping a mental note to that promise. He hummed and turned towards his animal farm, he'll need to check up on his animals. He walked towards it, passing by the double chest he placed outside for the needed materials and food for the animals. 

He walked in, "Good morning."

He patted a cow's head nearby and fed him some wheat. He tossed a few more wheat into the pen, allowing the rest to eat as well. He smiled as they enjoyed their food and he turned to give some to the sheep as well. When he finished all the wheat, he turned to the pigs and fed them carrots. He chuckled when the pigs slobbered all over his hand. He shook his head and dunked his hand into a nearby bucket of water, placed there in case things like that happened. 

He turned to the chickens and patted their feathery backs gently. He tossed a few seeds into their own and leaned against the fence to watch them eat. The chickens clucked in delight as they pecked at the ground, scratching it every now and then and spreading the seeds more. He grinned and walked out, grabbing four buckets from the chest. He turned and walked into the forest, following the familiar sound of rushing water. 

He should find a way to make himself his own little source of water soon. He had always wanted a pond in his clearing anyways. Maybe a few fish to keep him company as well. He chuckled as he toed off his boots and waded into the river, tugging his skirt up so it wouldn't get wet. He bent down and collected water into his bucket. When he filled all three of them, he walked out and shook his feet free of water. He pulled his boots back on and walked towards his little clearing. When he arrived, he turned straight to his animal farm and poured the water into the little holes that were meant for the animals' drinking fountain. 

He enjoyed this quiet and systematic life. It gave him a purpose, a clear goal. Keep his animals alive. Keep his crops alive and growing. Keep his house clean and sturdy. Keep his clearing beautiful. Keep himself alive. They were simple little things that gave him a sort of schedule to follow. It calmed him down and ensured his mind didn't wander for too long. Sure, he missed his old life and his friends but he wouldn't leave the life he has now. He enjoys it too much. 

He stretched before he kept the extra animal food into the chests and placed the buckets back in. While the chickens were busy drinking from the water, he walked into their pen and collected half of their eggs. He left the other half to crack and grow into little chicks. It was good to take but he wouldn't take everything, not like before. His eyes glazed over as he remembered the many things he had done. Remembering the many things he had taken.

_He had taken the discs, watched as Tommy and Tubbo's faces fell with despair as they lost again. Then, they lit up with determination and Dream felt something warm in his chest, fighting off the cold he felt when he had seen their dejection. He had taken their determination._

_He had taken their land and turned it into rubble, blowing the very ground below them to cinders. He had laughed and cheered and celebrated as he watched their faces fall as they gave up. As they realized they would never win. He had taken their freedom._

_He had taken his freedom of choice. He had convinced Eret that siding with him was the better choice. He had used flowery words and empty promises of fake power. He had enticed the other man into taking the offer. It wasn't of free will, it was of manipulation and lies. He had taken his choice._

_He had taken their hope. He watched with glee as the group all fell, one by one. He watched as their faces fell when he abused his bloodline and pulled out their inventories by force. He had watched as their inventories got emptied one by one. He didn't dare look back to see what had happened to them, satisfied with their win. He had taken their last chance._

_He had taken their friendship for granted. He had used George, Sapnap and Punz for his own benefit. He had used their skills and power to crush the opposition. He had taken their trust in him and used it. He had taken their loyalty._

Dream closed his eyes and took a deep breath. That was in the past. He had realized how wrong he was. He had realized how stupid and manipulative he had been. He had realized how destructive his force was. He had realized a lot of things in his lonesome. Most of the things he wanted to take back just so they can go back to peace. 

~~But it was never meant to be.~~

~~After all, even if he wasn't there conflict continued to rise.~~

~~He had started it and ran away like a coward instead of ending it.~~

His eyes snapped open and he shook his head. That was enough wallowing in his own regret for the day. He chuckled somberly as he brought the eggs to his cottage. 

Maybe he should make some cake. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Therapy? Who needs that when you have cottagecore!!! 
> 
> If you twist it well enough, Dream could be manipulative even as far as the disc war, honestly. :) 
> 
> Hope you enjoy!!


	5. An Injured Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He makes a new friend...
> 
> And gets a visit from an old one...

It had been an entire month since Tubbo had visited Dream. Since he didn't have a communicator, having left it behind, he couldn't really reach out to the teen to ask about his day. So, Dream was back to the silent and systematic life of his. He checked on his animals, which now included the bees slowly populating his area, and tended to his crops. He knitted and sewed more clothes, in case he needed them or if Tubbo would come visit as well. 

He had been making trips to the village more and more frequently, needing more materials for his planned trip to the Nether. If he was going to house his injured friends, he might as well start making potions. He had even started to extend his house upwards, creating a second floor for extra space and rooms. He chuckled to himself as he walked through the trees, giving him shade. 

He was about to reach his home when he stopped. He thought he heard something. He strained his ears to listen to his surroundings one more time. There it was. It was a small pained mewl. Dream blinked and began looking around, trying to find the source of the sound. It was an injured cat. Dream crouched down and gently reached out, keeping both his hands in the cat's view. The cat mewled weakly and limped towards him, bumping her about against his palm. He paused and pet the cat a bit, assessing her injuries. 

She was a completely black cat with bright green eyes that matched his own. Her underbelly was patched with white along with some red from her wound. Her paws and snout were also white. Dream knelt to the ground and coaxed the cat to come closer to his arms. The cat mewled and limped towards him, resting her head against his open palm. He took it as an invitation to gently scoop her up into his arms, avoiding her wounds. He stood up and walked back to his home, letting his navy blue skirt sway along the wind as he hurried back. The cat mewled again, snuggling her head against his chest. He felt his heart warm at the sight, cooing at the cat in reassurance. 

Once he reached his home, he brushed past the flowers and the bees and walked into his home. He walked to his dining table and carefully pushed the dishes on top away as he laid the cat down. He walked towards his storage room and grabbed some bandages. He walked out and set his tools down so he could help the cat easily. 

He grabbed a cloth and dunked it into a bucket of water, wringing it before he brought it to wipe at the cat's wound. The cat hissed, her nails extending and clawing at the table. Dream winced at the sound as he continued to wipe the blood away, being careful not to get scratched by the hissing cat. When he finished cleaning the wound, he applied a few drops of a healing potion. When he finished, he wrapped the wound with bandages and tied it tight so it wouldn't bleed. Dream checked the cat over once more because of her limp. He wasn't that well versed with healing and he sighed when he wasn't able to tell what was wrong. 

The cat purred when Dream ran a comforting hand over her head and body. He smiled at her as he patted her head slightly.

"We'll have to go to the village to get your legs checked out. I can't… I'm not that good yet." Dream shook his head. 

He scooped her into his arms and looked out. It was getting late. He placed the cat by his pillow and moved to clean his table. He threw the dirty cloth into the buckets and dumped the excess bandages into his little fireplace he had installed when he extended his house. He washed the bloodied cloth before he left it to hang over his crafting table. He could see the sun has yet to fully set and Dream walked out with the bucket filled with bloody water. He walked to the edge of the clearing and dumped the water, watching as it flowed down and disappeared to the ground. Dream hummed and walked back to his home. He can grab another bucket full of water next time. 

He set the bucket down beside the door as he closed it behind him. He stretched his arms above his head and walked to his bed, sitting down by the edge of the bed. The cat had curled up by his pillow, her front leg sticking out in a weird angle. Dream licked his lips before he leaned back. He didn't want to lie down and accidentally jostle the cat, what with her injury. He leaned against the wall and closed his eyes. He might get a stiff neck but that was preferable to an even more injured cat. 

When the sun rose and peeked over his eyelids, Dream groaned and threw an arm over his eyes. He was about to go back to sleep when he felt a small nudge from his side. He blinked and looked down, seeing the cat tilt her head up at him. Now that he can see her up close, he could see that she was holding her right front leg up. So, that must be where the break or fracture is. He chuckled and patted her head as a greeting. 

He stood up and stretched, smoothening his skirt. He moved to the kitchen and went through the chests. He grabbed a cooked steak he had made from yesterday and some raw fish. He walked back to the main room to see the cat sitting on his bed, head tilted as he approached. 

"Good morning, little one." He hummed, crouching down to her level. He bit into his steak as he reached out with one hand to feed the cat the fish. 

He smiled when she reached down and sniffed the fish before taking it into her mouth. She jumped and landed down on the ground and sat down beside him. He blinked when she started to eat her food beside him. He chuckled and plopped down on the ground, finished his steak as well. 

"Let's go get you fixed up in the village." Dream muttered, petting her. When she finished eating, he nudged a small bowl with water towards her. She pawed at it for a moment before drinking the water. 

When she finished, Dream scooped her into his arms gently and started to walk to the village. It won't do well to keep her injury like that. He wondered lightly how and why she was injured in the first place. He looked down with questioning eyes as she purred and bumped her head against his chest. He chuckled and shook his head, looking forward as he navigated through the forest. 

It wasn't long before he broke from the forest line and into the vast expanse of the plains biome. Dream grinned, walking towards the village he loved. It was a little getaway when his home was too quiet. When he felt too lonely. When he had nothing to do and his thoughts got too loud. He would find an escape in this village. A second escape from his insecurities and regrets. Another safe space. 

He smiled when he reached the perimeter of the village. He greeted everyone he saw with a nod and a wave, careful not to jostle the cat in his arms too much. He walked to the center of the village where he knew the cleric was. When he arrived, he raised a hand and knocked on the door, stepping back to wait for him. He didn't have to wait long as the door swung open and the cleric hummed in greeting. Dream opened his mouth to say something when the cat mewled and both of them looked down at her. 

The cleric nodded in understanding and gestured for him to come inside. Dream smiled thankfully and walked in. He carefully sat the cat down on a bed that the cleric waved towards. Dream sat beside her at the edge of the bed, watching as she continued to curl up beside him as she purred. He chuckled and patted her head lightly. 

When the cleric came back, dragging a chair to sit on, Dream shifted so the cat could show her injured front leg to the cleric. He took the cat's paw and inspected it, pressing lightly and hearing the cat hiss. The cleric hummed and nodded. Dream blinked and nodded. 

He looked down and watched as the cleric inspected, nodding along to the villager's hums. He was glad he was learning, even if slowly, how to heal injuries. Who knows what would happen to him if he gets injured on his lonesome and he can't limp to the village. He watched as the cleric carefully moved the paw and set the bones back in order before grabbing some bandages. He wrapped the paw tightly with a small stint to help keep it stable. Dream nodded as the villager gave tips about how much healing potions he could give the cat. 

"Thank you." Dream smiled up at the cleric, gathering the cat carefully into his arms. "I don't… I'm not really good with the more intricate parts."

The cleric hummed, pushing the chair back as he stood up. He came back with a book and handed it to Dream. He blinked at the book before taking it, running a thumb over the title. 

"But… don't you need this?" Dream inquired. When the cleric hummed in denial, he nodded, "Thank you. I'll study this more."

If he was going to help his friends, he was going to have to learn. After all, he only knew how to do first aid- something he did a lot during Manhunts. It'd do good for him to know how to patch someone up. What with the tricky respawn mechanics. Dream looked down at the cat in his arms. He smiled as she snuggled into his arms and purred in contentment. 

"Thank you, again." 

The cleric nodded and hummed. Dream laughed as he stood up. He thanked him once more and left the village, walking home. He was glad he did this quite early in the morning. The village was a bit far from his home if he walked after all. The sun had peaked in the middle of the sky when Dream had gone back. He hummed and set the cat down by the flowers. If he wants to keep her, he'll need a small pond to grow and breed fishes. He scanned his area and mapped the clearing. With a smile, he walked back to his cottage to grab his tools. 

He grabbed his shovel (spoon) and walked out, shooting a quick glance at the cat. She was peacefully sleeping amidst the flowers and Dream chuckled. He wanted a pond anyways. He moved to the left side of his home and started to dig. He didn't know how long he had dug as the sun began to set. He huffed and blew at a few strands of his hair that got out of the bun. He pulled it up somewhere along digging for the small pond he had planned on making. He stretched his arms and let out a satisfied him when he heard a few cracks. He climbed out of his home and looked down at it. It was coming together, he'll just need to plant some algae and corals for the fish to be able to live. 

He kept his shovel in his inventory and dusted his skirt. He knew he should've changed when he started to dig but he had forgotten in his excitement to build something so soon. He chuckled and walked to the cat and picked her up. She mewled and tilted her head at him. 

"Time for bed, kitty." Dream mused, taking her to his cottage. He placed her down on the ground and watched as she tested walking around with the stint on her leg. When she didn't seem to have any problems, Dream walked to the kitchen to grab food for the both of them. 

When he came out, he blinked when he saw the cat stretching on his bed. He snorted and sat on the ground, placing the raw fish beside him. The cat perked up and sniffed the air before turning to him. He gestured to the fish on the ground as he bit into his pork chop. The cat blinked, tilting her head before jumping down gracefully from the bed. He chuckled, cats seem to always be graceful even when injured. 

He watched as she ate the fish beside him. He finished the pork chop and dusted his hands on his skirt. He'll have to wash it later since he didn't change out of it when he dug out the pond. He shook his head and looked down at the cat who was licking her uninjured paw. Dream left her on the floor as he walked to the storage room to change into less dirty clothes. He changed out of the dirty and dusty clothes before pulling on a dark brown sweater and jean jumpers. He let one of the suspenders slip from his shoulder as he walked out.

Dream smiled fondly when he walked out to the cat curled up at the foot of his bed. Even if she was there, he couldn't sleep properly yet. He sat on the edge of the bed, getting ready to lean back and sleep just like last night when he felt a head push against his arm. The cat meowed and continued to push against his leg. He gave her a look as she meowed again.

"Do you want me… to lie down?" Dream asked. The cat tilted her head and mewled. Dream chuckled as he picked her up before he lied down. He set her down slowly and watched as she padded around before she snuggled close to his arm. 

Dream smiled and shifted slowly and snuggled close to her as well. He pulled the sheets over them and he closed his eyes, falling into a sweet sleep. 

The next few days were like normal, except Dream had a little friend to keep him company. Whenever he went out to his gardens to tend to them, the cat would follow and sit by the fence. Whenever he went off to work with his animal farm, the cat would follow him along and clean herself afterwards. Whenever he would work on his bees, the cat would roll around by his flowers and he'd chuckled at her. 

It wasn't long before she was fully healed and Dream carefully unwrapped the bandages and took out the splint. When the cat was free, she jumped off his lap and walked around, testing her foot. Dream chuckled and opened the door, expecting the cat to run off and never be seen again. Instead, she sat down and tilted her head at him. 

"You want to stay?" Dream asked, crouching down and petting her. When she purred and circled around his hand, moving to stand by his feet, he chuckled. "Well, I'll have to find a name for you."

Dream hummed as he ran his fingers over her soft fur. She laid down, tumbling over and exposing her stomach as she played with the end of his braided hair. Dream giggled as he noticed the white patch of fur that ran down her belly and appeared on the areas of her feet.

"How about… Patches?" 

The newly dubbed Patches mewled and stood up, curling and rubbing herself against his leg. Dream laughed and petted her. 

"I'll take that as a yes." 

Dream almost fell over with a yelp when Patches lunged at him and curled around his shoulder. He balanced himself while Patches situated herself on his shoulders. Once she found her footing and curled up, Dream slowly stood up. 

"Are you going to stay there for a while?" Dream teased, watching as her tail flicked and hit him on his face. He scrunched up his face and shook his head slowly. 

He had planned on continuing the pond once Patches had left but now that he had her as company he might as well continue with his small project. He stretched his arms and took his shovel out of his inventory. He walked towards the little put he dug and continued to dig, a bit more careless now that he was wearing pants and not his skirt. Patches continued to lounge on his shoulders despite the movement and Dream was impressed. 

When he finished, he dusted his hands on the front of his pants and looked at the hole he made. He nodded to himself and climbed out, throwing his shovel up first. He'll get some water and plant some water plants to keep the fishes he'll add to the pond alive. He hummed and kept his shovel in his inventory. He walked out to the rushing river, Patches curled up comfortably on his shoulders. He chuckled at the reminder of her, her tails swishing along with his steps. 

He reached the river and took out four buckets. He'll make more than one round just to fill up that pond but it doesn't matter. He needs the exercise anyways. He filled the buckets and walked back. Not once did Patches stir from her sleep, even when he dumped the water into the dirt hole to fill it up. Not even when he made several more trips for more water. He chuckled and pet her head when he walked back into his cottage. She stretched on his shoulders before jumping down, circling an area and lying down. Her head rested on her paws as she looked up at him expectantly. 

"My, my, needy." Dream teased. He walked to the kitchen and grabbed some bread for himself and a fish for Patches. He set her fish down as he walked towards the stairs that led up to his unfinished second floor. He looked around and bit on the bread. He kept the bread by his mouth as he pulled out some blocks and began patching up some missing floor and walls. 

It didn't take long before he heard soft padding from behind him and he turned to see Patches peeking around the corner. He chuckled and placed one last block to patch up the hole. He grinned and looked around him, the sun peaking at the top. He'll make the roof later, when he could get more materials. He had already filled up the pond and fixed up the floor and walls. He can wait a bit more for a roof. 

He stretched his arms and walked back down, letting Patches explore the top. He is confident enough with his work that Patches would get hurt. Plus, he already patched up areas where he wanted windows to be placed. He leaned against the wall on the first floor and closed his eyes. Everything was calm. He enjoyed this calm. He opened his eyes when he felt Patches circling around his ankles. He smiled and bent down, picking her up. 

**He liked this calm.**

The next day came in a flash and Dream was tending to the pond, checking if the waters were fine for water plants to grow in. Everything was calm, Patches was seated beside him while he tested the waters. That was when everything shattered when a bloodied and injured body came limping through the woods. Dream shot up and his axe was in his hand, ready to defend himself. He tensed as the body got closer but his eyes widened when he noticed a familiar yet dull blue set of eyes meet his own.

"... _Tubbo_?" 

The teen fell forwards, finally losing all energy and collapsing. Dream threw his axe to the side and dashed forward, getting there in time to soften the boy's fall. He held the teen in his shaking arms as he took in the boy's state. Half his face was burnt and his chest was bleeding too much. Dream shook his head and carefully gathered him in his arms and brought him to his home.

He gently placed him on his bed and hurriedly ripped the dress shirt off to take in the entirety of the wound. He winced when he saw a deep gash and burns on his chest. He felt around Tubbo's ribs and flinched back when he could tell and feel multiple broken ribs. He took a deep and shaky breath as he rushed towards the storage room and grabbed all the bandages and potions he needed. He sat on the floor beside Tubbo as he scattered the items on the floor. He could tell from the lack of breathing from the teen that his body was going through the respawn process. 

With this type of wound, it'd be a wonder if Tubbo woke up within the next week or so. Dream shook his head as he got to work, dumping some cloth into a bucket of water. He began to clean the teen's wounds as his mind wandered. What happened? What caused Tubbo to get hurt? Who hurt him? Was it Schlatt? Was it someone else? Where was Tommy? Where was Wilbur? Those two would've helped Tubbo. Tubbo wouldn't have come to him if something else hadn't happened. _Why didn't he go to Tommy or Wilbur? **Why him?**_

As he continued to slowly and carefully clean the wounds, his mind continued to wander to the respawning mechanics. It hurt and it wasn't pretty. When your body was hurt beyond repair, it was like your body would go into a vegetative state as the body heals oneself. You'd die, you'd be floating in the void of your mind as your body tried to heal itself on its own. If no one would retrieve your body and left you to heal, it would end with people taking weeks to wake up from their self-imposed coma. Helping the body heals by patching it up and giving it potions can speed up the process.

Dream side-eyed the potions of healing at his side, the glowing pink potion giving him hope. Usually, drinking large doses of healing potions- or any potion for that matter- would send one's body into disrepair. The body would try and retain some semblance of homeostasis as it catches up to the rapid change of pace. This ends up with the person getting a fever or puking. However, pumping potions into a respawning body is not foreign. People do it to help the body heals faster and the person isn't conscious enough to feel the pain of the body trying to stay in balance. 

Once Dream finished cleaning the wounds, Patches having sat beside him, he threaded a needle and started to stitch Tubbo's wound. It was deep enough that stitching it was necessary. When he finished stitching the deep wound, he grabbed some herbal disinfectant that the village taught him how to make. He applied it around the general area of the wound and wrapped it with bandages tightly to avoid bleeding. Once he finished, he grabbed some burn cream and applied it over Tubbo's burns. They seem to crawl over his chest and towards his arms and face. Dream winced, knowing these scars would carry over despite the respawn. He shook his head to rid those thoughts and continued to apply the cream. He leaned back with a sigh, having finished applying the cream. 

He picked up some potions, ignoring how Patches climbed into his lap and curled up. He opened Tubbo's mouth slightly and poured the potion in. He finished one whole bottle before he closed the teen's mouth and blocked his airway. While the body was in it's respawn process, it still responds to outside stimuli. This action caused the stasis body to swallow the potion and Dream sighed in relief. 

He leaned back. He'll administer more potions if the teen's state didn't improve in thirty minutes. Healing potions, especially the ones he had, were potent and tended to work quickly. He looked down at the bundle of fur on his lap and he ran a hand through her fur to calm himself. 

When he said he'd help his friends, he didn't expect them to come to him practically dead. 

He shivered and looked away. Who else would come by? Who else does he have to tend to their comatose form? _Who else would he have to watch over, feeling regret and pain stab at his chest? **Who else would come by and make Dream regret ever leaving in the first place?**_

He shook his head closed his eyes, dragging a hand down his face and groaning. He patted Patches and watched as she stretched and jumped off, moving to circle around the bed before jumping up and curling up beside Tubbo. Dream chuckled and gathered the dirty items and threw them into his little fire place. He grabbed the bucket and walked outside, moving to the edge of the clearing and dumping the water. He walked back into the room and noticed how vulnerable and prone Tubbo's form was in the middle of his house. 

He shook his head and moved towards his storage area. If he was going to be bringing his friends over in this state and helping them, maybe having the extra room downstairs would be a whole lot easier than upstairs. He bent down and carried some chests over to the upstairs, grunting a bit in effort. Despite being heavier and more tiring, it was less time consuming than emptying the chests one by one and putting them all back together. 

It wasn't long before he finished and he checked the sun outside. The sun barely moved from it's spot but Dream could tell almost an hour had passed. He walked down and looked around the empty room. He set down another bed, fixing up it's sheets and pillows. He walked out and checked Tubbo's state. The burns didn't look that pronounced anymore but the scars were there. He pressed a gentle hand around Tubbo's chest and sighed in relief to see that his bones had healed with less complications. 

He carefully picked up him up and moved him to the extra room. He set him down on the bed and brushed the teen's hair out of his face. He smiled fondly at the teen and moved out. He gathered the dirtied sheets from all the blood and threw them into the fire. He could always sew some more later. He looked down at Patches and let out a sigh. He fell to the floor and rested his head against the bed, letting out a sigh. His body finally relaxed and all the adrenaline of seeing his friend hurt and dying soon left him. _He just felt so tired._

He closed his eyes and would've fallen asleep had he not heard a scream from the room. He shot up, ignoring how Patches hissed and jumped away from the bed as well. He ran to the room, ready to calm Tubbo down. 

"Tubbo- Tubbo?" 

"Cl-clay?" Tubbo stuttered out, eyes wide and filled with pain. 

Dream internally curses, forgetting that sometimes the respawn mechanics can glitch out and bring someone out of comatose if they're healed enough. He walked in slowly, Patches nudging the door from behind as she peeked in as well. 

"It's fine, you're fine. I mostly healed you but you need to calm down and-"

"It hurts, Clay." Tubbo sobbed, his eyes tearing up. "It really hurts."

"I know." Dream soothed, kneeling beside him. He gathered the sobbing teen into his arms. "You'll be fine."

"Don't leave me, Clay." Tubbo clutched his sweater in his hands as he sobbed into his shoulder. 

"I won't."

**_Not anymore. He's done with running away. He's done with leaving his friends._ **

~~**_That didn't mean he wanted to go back._ ** ~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do we stan caretaker/nurse Dream? We do. We definitely do. 
> 
> Man doesn't brew potions just yet but sooner or later he's gonna be the resident doctor/psychiatrist, watch! 
> 
> Also, Tubbo!! Patches!!!
> 
>   
> ALSO SOMEONE POSTED FANART!! I have also gotten some dm's with fanart and they're all super pretty!! Whether you post it or it's in my dm's I'll love you forever please--
> 
> **  
> [FANART!!!](https://www.instagram.com/p/CKKjyaRHoP6/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link)  
>  **
> 
> **  
> [ FANART 2!!!](https://twitter.com/creatiling/status/1344225386477932544?s=20)  
>  ******


	6. Whirldwind of Emotion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tubbo wakes up but...
> 
> Dream gets a wake up call as well...

Dream continued to hug the sobbing teen in his arms. Whatever had to have happened was bad. So bad that Tubbo just mentally and emotionally shut down and continued to cry. He whispered reassurances and comfort as he threaded a hand through Tubbo's hair. Patches had come closer and nudged her head against Dream's foot. He hummed and raised an eyebrow at her. She reciprocated with a mewl and walked towards them, pushing herself in between Dream and Tubbo. Dream was about to scold her but the action seemed to have caught Tubbo's attention. 

He hiccuped, "You- who's this?"

Dream licked his lips. It'd be best to distract Tubbo from his current pain and bring him to a better and less painful topic. So, he smiled and petted Patches, "She's a cat I found injured on the way home. We both got attached to each other so she stayed with me. Her name is Patches."

"That's cute." Tubbo sniffled, giving a wobbly smile.

"If you want, I have a bee farm outside with the flowers." Dream suggested. "You don't have to walk, I can carry you."

"No- no- it's… it's fine." Tubbo shook his head. 

Dream stood up and held out a hand for Tubbo. He watched as Tubbo took a deep breath and took his hand, pulling himself up with a since. When he stumbled forward, Dream caught him and helped him stand steadily.

"Thanks." Tubbo smiled up at him. 

Dream smiled back and nodded. He knew Tubbo didn't want to be seen as weak and vulnerable. He knew the teen was capable of taking care of himself. He knew this and yet he still wanted to mother and protect him. He watched as Tubbo wiped his eyes before he looked down. 

His face flushed as he looked away, "Do you have an extra…Sweater?" 

Dream blinked before he realized he had taken off Tubbo's dress shirt and blazer so he could wrap him in bandages. He held up a hand and walked out, leaving Tubbo and Patches to stare at each other. He climbed the stairs and grabbed a dark green sweater he had knitted for Tubbo. He walked back down and handed it to him, watching as he pulled it over his head and wore the comfortable material. 

He smiled as he watched Tubbo run his fingers through the knitting in awe, "This, this is new- did you make this?"

"I make most of the things here." Dream waved his hand around. "I-- It's more comforting to work on something when you don't have anything to worry about."

"Yeah…" Tubbo whispered, wringing the edge of the sweater in his hands. 

"You want to see my bee farm?" Dream smiled, "I made it right when you left."

Tubbo's eyes sparkled as he looked up, "You have a bee farm!?" 

"I do, yes." Dream chuckled. He was about to walk out when he felt Patches tug at his pants leg. He crouched down and waited for her to jump onto his shoulders and situate herself. 

"That's cute." Tubbo commented.

Dream chuckled, "She does this sometimes."

Tubbo beamed. While his eyes were still puffy and his hands still shook, Dream was glad to see the teen smile again. He nodded and led the teen to his little flower patch with his bee farm. He had managed to expand a little more and replant a few flowers here and there when he moved things around. In the end, he liked how it looked with the bee farm creating a small semi-circle around the flowers. He sat down and patted the spot next to him, noting how Tubbo was so enraptured by the bees.

"Are you okay now?" Dream asks.

"Yeah, I feel a bit sore and my skin feels tight but… I'm generally fine." Tubbo nodded. "You- you gave me a potion, didn't you?" 

"I did, else you'd be stuck here for weeks." Dream informed him, leaning back against his hands as Patches curled up on his neck. "You didn't seem to have your communicator with you and I had a feeling your friends wouldn't take it too well to see you gone for too long."

Tubbo gasped and slapped his palm against his head, "You're right! Tommy!"

Dream reached out and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, stopping the teen from bolting upright and running off, "Hey, hey, calm down for a second. You just need a little time to heal just a bit. Let the healing potion do it's work."

"I know but-"

"If you feel too stressed." Dream cut in. "I'm here to listen, remember."

Tubbo paused and stared at him for a long moment. During that time, Dream fidgeted under his gaze. He didn't want to cut in and interrupt Tubbo but then he'd have found ways to run off even when he was still injured. He just needed Tubbo to calm down, maybe sit still for a while and let his wounds heal. Letting him go too soon would only end in disaster and cause the teen to get more hurt. He might even rip open the wound on his chest again. 

"Right. Yeah, you're right." Tubbo nodded. "I-- I have a lot on my mind that I want to say."

"Go ahead, I won't judge you." Dream smiled softly. 

Tubbo took a deep breath, "Schlatt is a right bastard. He made me decorate and host a stupid festival for Manberg and it just ended up with it being a fucking execution."

Dream nodded. So, Schlatt was the reason for everyone's duress. That's understandable. There has to be one catalyst to it all. It also explained Tubbo's situation when he had stumbled into the clearing with fatal injuries. Still, letting a teen decorate his own execution? That was bordering sociopathic. Not even Dream thought that was a good idea and he has had some pretty morbid ideas come and pass. 

"He- he called up Technoblade and forced him to shoot me with his rocket launcher." Tubbo blew at his fringe. "I don't… I don't blame Techno, he- he was pressured. There were too many people and I could tell he didn't know what to do. Wilbur had told me to trust Technoblade and I do. I still do even if he hurt me."

"Schlatt… called up your own ally to execute you?" Dream blanched. Not even he would go that far. When Eret had betrayed L'manberg, he merely let him stay back and watch. All he had to do was lead them to the bunker and press the button. He didn't ask Eret to do anything to his former allies. 

"He did. It- it was terrifying. He had this huge rocket launcher and it… it hurt." Tubbo admitted, playing with the grass. "I think Schlatt and Quackity got caught in the crossfire but I had thrown an Ender Pearl to get away. It won't do to have my comatose body just… lying there." 

"So you came to me?" Dream blinked in shock.

Tubbo smiled up at him, "Why shouldn't I? Everything was in chaos when I limped off. I-- even if I went to Pogtopia, Wilbur- who isn't really in his right mind right now- would have to take care of me and Tommy. I-- oh god, Tommy jumped into the fray and attacked Techno when I pearled out!" 

"Hey, hey, hey." Dream brought a hand up and Tubbo focused on that. "I'm sure… I'm sure Tommy would be fine. From what you tell me, he's capable of taking care of himself, right? Plus, isn't Technoblade technically on your side? I'm sure he wouldn't hurt Tommy."

"Yeah- yeah, you're right." Tubbo ran a hand through his hair. "It's just… ever since I found out he only had one life left-"

"Excuse me?" Dream was taken aback. He knew the life system of his own server, how could he not as he's the admin. He was very careful during the L'manberg Revolution to ensure that no one lost an actual life. The duel with Tommy being the only casualty he remembers. **_Right?_ **

"All the L'manberg citizens lost one life to Dream and his friends during… when we were betrayed." Tubbo rubbed his arm. "It's a long story but yeah, there was an overdose of the poison."

Dream stilled, his eyes going foggy. He killed his friends. He overdosed them with poison. Poison. That was one of the worst ways to die. He- he could've sworn that he brewed it right. He could've sworn it wasn't potent enough to kill them. He was careful. He was supposed to be careful!

_At least, that's what he thought._

Maybe he should've left sooner. Maybe he shouldn't have allowed the war. Maybe he should've done something better. Maybe he should've been more careful. Maybe he should've been more attentive. _Maybe he should've stayed in the bunker to see if they were overdosed or not. Maybe he should've done so much more for them._ **_Maybe he shouldn't have started the war. Maybe he-_ **

He snapped out of his spiralling thoughts when Tubbo shook him slightly. The teen had concern in his eyes.

He didn't deserve the concern, he didn't deserve to be with him. He didn't deserve anything. He ruined it. _He killed three teens. He killed them and he also killed Tommy. He had killed._ **_He killed Tommy twice. He killed him twice. He-_ **

"Clay?" 

"I- I'm sorry, it's just… poison is the worst way to die." He whispered, hands clenching and unclenching on his lap. He took a deep shaky breath, "You can- you can go on. I was just shocked, that's all." 

"Are you sure?" Tubbo rested a hand on Dream's arm.

Dream breathed in and nodded, "Yeah. You were saying?"

"Tommy lost his second life to Dream, again." Tubbo muttered. "It was in a duel… when I found out that he actually died and didn't just… pass out in the water… I was scared. Now, now we both have one life left."

Dream shook in his spot, eyes watering as he thought about it more. He had caused these teens so much grief. He had caused them so much anguish. He had taken two lives from them. Two lives that they could've used to have fun and play around on his server. This world was created for his friends to find peace and tranquility. Instead, he took that all away and it won't be long before they'll be ghosts. They'll be useless ghosts who would end up changing servers to get their bodies back. _It wasn't fair._ **_He wasn't fair._ **

"You- you should be careful from now on." Dream whispered. "You- take care. Okay?" 

"I will. Tommy and I-- we've got each other's backs." Tubbo reassured, smiling brightly. 

Dream didn't know how he did it. How he could smile despite knowing he was in his last life. How he could smile despite everything going on around him. How he could smile despite knowing someone ruined their entire life. 

"Do take care, really." Dream insisted. "It- transferring servers hurts even more when you're a ghost."

"I know." Tubbo nodded. "We'll be careful."

Dream let out a sigh. He won't push the topic further from that. Instead, he leaned back and the both of them stayed silent, sorting through their own thoughts. Dream wallowed in his guilt and regret as he realized all the horrors he has caused to the people he had sworn to protect. He sighed and clutched the grass under his hands and turned to Tubbo. He noticed how he looked restless. 

"You really want to go back, don't you?" Dream piped up. 

Tubbo jerked from his spot and blinked before he gave a sheepish smile, "Yeah… I'm worried."

Dream smiled. He adored their friendship. It was pure and they had each other's backs. He nodded, "Are you feeling fine? Nothing hurts?"

"Not that I know." Tubbo patted himself down. "I'm a bit sore but that's it."

"Don't run. I stitched up your chest since the cut was too deep." Dream advised. "Be careful."

Tubbo grinned and nodded, "I will!"

He stood up, this time he didn't stumble. Dream chuckled and stood up. He ruffled Tubbo's hair as the teen dusted himself off. 

"You can wear the sweater." Dream cut in, noticing Tubbo was about to speak. "As a gift…"

"And a promise." Tubbo added.

"Oh?" Dream raised an eyebrow.

"To visit you again!" Tubbo beamed up at him. 

Dream paused, feeling his chest swell at the thought. He smiled and patted Tubbo's hair, "Of course you will." 

Tubbo nodded and waved at Patches, "I'll see you again soon." He turned to the bees and grinned, "You too as well!" 

Dream chuckled at that, "Yep, so no need to fret." 

Tubbo giggled and waved at him as he walked out. He hadn't brought anything and Dream watched him go. He didn't move until he couldn't see Tubbo due to the foliage. He hummed as Patches mewled by his ear.

"Yeah, I feel bad. I've done so much wrong to these kids and they trust me so much…" There was a pause. "Well, they trust _Clay_."

Patches purred and her tail swayed as she shifted on his shoulder. Dream chuckled and tilted his head to nuzzle it against Patches.

"Well, what can we do about that now. We're living a new life. If we want to move on, there's no need to dwell on the past." Dream looked towards his house. "Not when the future is much brighter."

He chuckled and walked back to his little home. When he closed the door behind him, Patches jumped off and curled up by the door. He hummed and looked towards the stairs. He walked up and looked at the hastily placed chests around. He sighed and shook his head. He'll move everything properly. He stretched and bent down, picking up one chest. He fell into a familiar and soothing rhythm as he arranged the upper part of his home. He had just finished arranging the chests and was about to section out the area for rooms when he heard Patches hiss. 

He raced downstairs, his axe (Peace, not Nightmare, never _Nightmare_ ) already in his hand. He threw the door open and froze. Standing right in front of him was a familiar face. A face that he always saw at the other end of an arena during MCC. A face that everyone considered his rival. Standing before him at the moment was Technoblade. Technoblade who was drenched in blood, clearly not his own, and some parts of his outfit was singed. 

He gripped his axe tightly. 

He didn't know what to think of the other man. Tubbo had admitted that Technoblade was the one who had executed him. By the blood on his outfit and hands, Dream can't help but agree. Yet, Tubbo had also said he had forgiven Technoblade. 

It was all too confusing for him. He didn't know whether to trust the man before him. He didn't know if he could let this man who had hurt Tubbo and potentially a lot of other people as well. He didn't know if he could let him into this safe sanctuary. Then again, he had also hurt so many people. He had made bad decisions and caused pain and anguish. _If he could have a safe sanctuary, why can't Technoblade?_

His mind whirled with confusion and frustration. He opened his mouth to speak. 

"Hi."

**_Someone please bury him in the deepest part of hell and leave him to rot._ **

The axe in his hand had long disappeared during his internal debate and now he merely stood awkwardly in front of the famed legend before him. He gave an awkward smile and hoped he didn't come off as awkward or threatening. This entire clearing was a safe space. He didn't care who would come over anymore. If they needed his help, he'd extend a hand.

"Hello." Technoblade responded, his deep voice rumbling. 

"Why- are you hurt?" Dream stumbled with his words as he glanced down at the bloodied outfit the other wore. 

"No." Technoblade cleared his throat. 

"Why are you here?" Dream enunciated slowly, treading carefully with his words. He could tell how tense Technoblade was and how the other seemed to want to bolt away. 

Technoblade shifted on his feet, a hand coming up to shift his boar mask a bit. Doing so caused him to smudge some blood on the pristine white bone and his long pig-like ears twitched, "I was- I was trying to make my way back to Pogtopia and saw this… Who are you?" 

Dream realized with a start that Technoblade technically didn't know him. He didn't know if Tubbo mentioned him to the hybrid or if he had just stumbled upon the clearing by chance. He breathed in and cleared his throat, taking a step to the side as he gestured inside.

"I'm Clay, maybe… do you want to come in?" 

Technoblade took a wary step inside, eyeing the area around him with a sharp eye. He watched as the strange man walked towards a table with chairs, a cat following at his heels. Technoblade didn't know why he was here in the first place. He had just caused great anarchy and chaos in the festival after killing a supposed ally. 

_Blood for the blood God. Execution. Nice. L. He was your ally. You ruined it. Peer pressure. They had weapons. Not your fault. Should've killed Schlatt again. All his fault. Definitely. L._

He regrets it. He really does. Tubbo didn't deserve any of that. Decorating a festival only for it to be revealed as some wicked plot of an execution. He won't blame the kid if he hated him. He won't blame Tommy for lashing out and blaming him. His feet had moved on its own and now here he was, in a stranger's home. 

_Familiar. Very familiar. HE HAS A CAT!! POG!! Nice house!! His hair is pretty. Are those flowers? We saw a bee! Bee!! Trust him, come on. No, you can't trust him. Maybe he wants you dead. Maybe he works for Schlatt. But he has a nice house!_

Technoblade snapped out of his own mind, the multitude of voices being pushed to the back as he looked up at the man's imploring stare. 

"Uh, I don't think you know me-"

"I do, Tubbo mentioned you a couple of times." The man smiled. 

_Tubbo? How does he know Tubbo? L. Sadded. He definitely knows you as a murderer. A traitor. Oof, how will you fix this? Who is he? His name? Brick? Claw? Cas? What was it? Clay?_

"Oh… right." Technoblade cleared his throat. 

"I can see you're tense. Do you want some tea?" The man- Clay was it?- suggested. 

"Right, yeah. Thanks." 

Technoblade awkwardly sat on the table, his hands tapping restlessly on the wooden table. He looked down and noticed how the cat stared at him. She had startling green eyes, just like her owner. He blinked when she tilted her head and jumped up on the table. He leaned back when the cat stalked closer, sniffing him.

_CAT! CAT! CAT! PET HER! TOUCH HER! SHE PRETTY! CUTE CUTE CUTE!!_

Technoblade shook his head, berating Chat for their attitude. It wasn't polite to pet an animal that wasn't his own. Plus, it wasn't like he would even want to. His hands were caked with blood and if he let her he'd only ruin her coat of fur. It was beautiful and smooth and black. He startled in his seat when the cat had jumped from the table onto his lap. He kept his hands in the air. 

Dream had finished brewing the tea and brought it to the main room on a tray. When he walked in, he almost wheezed when he noticed the situation that Technoblade was in. Patches had found a comfortable spot on his lap and the hybrid seemed to keep his hands away from her. He must've noticed him entering the room when his head shot up. 

"I see Patches likes you." Dream hummed. "She hadn't done that when Tubbo visited." 

"Oh." 

"Here's some tea." Dream smiled at the tense and awkward hybrid. He wasn't going to force him to speak. Being there can suffice for him. 

He set the cups down and poured some tea into them. He moved and sat across from Technoblade. He watched with an amused smile as Technoblade maneuvered around Patches and took the cup into his hands. 

"Wearing such bloody clothes must be tiring and icky." Dream stated amicably. 

He watched as Technoblade tensed under his gaze. He didn't want to call out the other man about his actions, he himself had his own fair share of mistakes and bloodied outfits. All he wanted to know was Technoblade's side. While he won't force him to speak, he was just curious to see what he had to say. What he wanted to say. Sometimes ranting to someone could help one calm down immensely. Especially if it was a stranger. There were no expectations, no consequences. No judgements when the person you're speaking to never knew you personally. 

"Yeah, it is." Technoblade admitted.

"I'm sure a few of my sweaters can fit you." Dream suggested with a smile. "If you want to change?"

"Uh, no thanks." He stated. He fidgeted with the cup before taking one sip, "I won't… I won't be staying long anyways."

"If that's what you want." Dream nodded. He took a sip of his tea, something he had learned to brew from the village. He smiled into the cup before setting it down. 

"What… what did Tubbo tell you about me?" Technoblade spoke up.

Dream perked up and gave an easy smile, "Well, he spoke highly of you. Great warrior and very skilled, y'know."

Technoblade looked down and gripped the cup tightly, "He… he didn't say he hated me?"

"He said he understood you." Dream hummed, playing with the end of his braid. "He told me how he didn't blame you for something you couldn't control."

There was a pause and Dream took that time to take a sip from his cup. They sat in comfortable silence. Patches shifted from her spot and started pawing at Technoblade's accessories that hung from his cloak. The hybrid chuckled and pulled it away from the cat. She merely jumped up on his shoulder and curled before sitting on his shoulders. 

Dream huffed, pouting, "Patches, don't you love me anymore?" 

Technoblade let out a barking laugh, "She's mine now."

He let out a gasp, "How dare you. She's my cat!" 

"Not anymore, nerd." Technoblade snorted, leaning back on his seat. Dream was glad he was finally relaxing and he was less tense. "Who are you, really?"

Dream almost jumped from his seat at the question. He hadn't expected that. Not even Tubbo mentioned anything about that, just accepting a stranger's helping hand. If Dream thought about it more, he wanted to sigh. Tubbo was too trusting, really. Had it been anyone else, Dream would be concerned with how easily the teen trusted. He was glad it was him that he decided to trust and not someone more dangerous. 

Technoblade's question however made him pause. Who was he? Was he the masked warrior, famed for his strategy? Was he the boisterous friend who kept the group together? Was he the tyrant ruler, someone who brought his enemies to the ground? _Was he a sympathetic leader, known for giving mercy to those who asked?_ **_Was he a nobody that could easily disappear without anyone noticing?_**

"Just a man who ran away from his problems." Dream admitted. He hadn't expected to lay his entire life bare to Technoblade but something about the hybrid made him want to talk. To admit. "A coward, really." 

"Nah, I don't think you are." Technoblade mused.

Dream snorted and leaned forward, "How would you know?" 

"No one's a coward for running." Technoblade shrugged, playing his now empty cup. "You're just aware and choosing your battles."

"What if I don't want more battles?" Dream raised an eyebrow. 

"Then who can blame you?" He gave a wry smile. "No one wants to fight constant battles."

Dream could tell from his voice how tired he felt. Like the weight of the world was on his shoulders. Technoblade always seemed so fond and cheerful whenever he fought. Anyone who would see him could say that he liked fighting. That he liked violence. 

"People would say you enjoy battles." Dream hummed. 

"The would." Technoblade agreed.

He could understand that. The adrenaline that pumped through his veins as he fought was exhilarating. He loved the heavy weight of a shield on his arm, the familiar glint of the axe. He enjoyed the swift and fluid motions when he fought. That didn't mean he wanted to do it all his life. That could destroy a man. 

Dream gazed at Technoblade's form. How the man shifted in his seat. How his feet kept tapping on the wooden floor. How his hands wouldn't stop flipping the cup over and over. How his head was tilted ever so slightly, as if indicating he was trying to look at everything at the same time. 

"Do you want to spar, perhaps?" Dream suggested.

Sometimes, when he didn't want to think he'd spar. The familiar motions of fighting helped clear his head. It also helped when he was restless. Sometimes, he'd go out purposefully and fight zombies and skeletons and creepers. He's parkour through the trees and brush up on his skills. He could tell Technoblade wanted something to do. He could tell how restless he was. 

"What?" Technoblade looked at him. 

"Spar? Fight? You seem a bit… restless."

"I didn't take you for one who can fight." Technoblade teased, setting the cup down. 

"Oh, I can fight." Dream rolled his eyes. "Don't let the cottage and flower patch fool you."

Technoblade barked out a laugh. This caused Patches to shift before jumping off his shoulder. She walked underneath the table and curled up. Technoblade shook his head, "Are you sure you want to fight me, Clay?"

Dream smirked. He'd always wanted to duel Technoblade one-on-one ever since the public considered them rivals. He just never got the chance ever since he went off and started soul searching without telling his friends. He just needed time for himself and that meant he couldn't appear publicly without suffering from the repercussions of running off. Now, however, he had a chance. A chance to fight with his famed "rival". 

"I'll definitely be able to catch up." Dream stood from his seat. 

"We'll see about that, nerd." Technoblade stood as well. 

They both walked out the cottage, with Dream allowing his axe to appear in hand. The enchantments glowed under the sun as he twirled it in his hands. Technoblade seemed to have shed his armor and stood before him with a Netherite axe in hand. 

"Rules?" Technoblade tilted his head, throwing his cape to the side. 

"No armor and disarming. Ten rounds?"

"You sure you can catch up to ten rounds?" Technoblade taunted. 

"I'm sure." Dream barked out a laugh, falling into position. 

The two circled around each other, their hands gripping their axes tightly. Dream eyed Technoblade’s stance and picked apart his defenses internally. He smirked and charged forward, the axe carving an arc in the air as he sliced down on Technoblade. The hybrid blocked him and their blades caused sparks. This didn’t stop Dream as he pushed back and swiped down at Technoblade’s knees. They parried and exchanged blows as they danced around the clearing, avoiding both the pond and the flower garden. Dream grinned as he pushed forward, sending hit after hit against Technoblade as he blocked every single one with a grunt. 

He knew Technoblade’s moves and his strategy. He was a fast and heavy hitter. If he would be on the offensive, he’d be backing Dream up to a corner. Instead, he adapted his style to best match the hybrid’s. An even faster yet lighter type of style compared to his. Dream didn’t dwell on the hits and instead switched around and continued to his Technoblade. He wasn’t looking to chip away at his defences, instead he wanted to make quick maneuvers to find a weak spot. A weak link. 

He ducked underneath a well timed strike from Technoblade before he lunged forward and tripped him. Technoblade stumbled back before he regained his footing in time to block Dream’s strike. Dream clicked his tongue as he jumped back, adjusting his grip on the axe as he analyzed his opponent’s form. He’s steady and has good balance. Dream tilted his head and narrowed his eyes, stepping forward before he drops down and kicks at Technoblade’s feet. The hybrid finally stumbled but not before he reached out and slammed his axe on Dream’s handle. Dream hissed at the strong vibrations it caused, forcing him to drop his axe. 

Technoblade chuckled from the ground, “The fall from the momentum gave me a bigger advantage on striking harder. Should’ve thought of that sooner.”

Dream flexed his hand, rubbing his wrist as he snorted, “Sure, we still have nine more rounds to go.” 

Technoblade bared his teeth in a savage grin, “That’s what I like to hear.”

Dream laughed and let the adrenaline in his blood carry him along the rest of the rounds. It ended with a tie and the two laid on the grass, panting from exertion. Technoblade chuckled as he shifted his mask and pushed it away so he could breathe properly. Dream noticed this from the corner of his eyes and turned away, respecting his privacy. Some people wanted to keep how their face looks as a private thing only shared to very few and trusted people, Dream knew how that felt. He just wished he showed that level of trust to George and Sapnap before he left. Then again, it helped him in the long run in case the two ever decided to stumble upon this clearing. He didn’t want it to be revealed that way. 

“That was a good one.” Technoblade chuckled, pushing himself to sit up. He looked at Dream who still pointedly looked away and tilted his head, “Eh?”

“Uh, your mask.” Dream coughed, sitting up as well.

Technoblade laughed, “That’s fine. You- you’re good.”

“Really?” Dream hazarded a peek from the corner of his eyes.

“You are.” Technoblade rolled his eyes as he leaned on his knees. “You- you seem like a pretty okay guy. You even managed a tie with me.”

Dream chuckled, “Thanks, I guess?”

Technoblade snorted, his ears twitching, “Not even **Dream** could get a tie with me.”

Dream stiffened. He blinked and turned towards his new friends and stared. Technoblade raised an eyebrow at his stare and that snapped him out of it, “Uh, who?”

“What? Tubbo spoke about me but not **Dream**? Hah, L.” Technoblade mused. 

“No, I meant- you fought Dream?” It felt weird saying his name as if he wasn’t speaking about himself. He could’ve sworn that he’d remember something as big as a duel with Technoblade, of all people, happening. Technoblade had always been his sort of idol and competition, he _would_ remember fighting him before today.

“Yeah, it was sort of like our duel? Ten rounds except we had diamond armor, axes, shields and swords. It was hosted on a bigger server where it was publicized.” Technoblade explained. “I won with the score of 6-4.” 

“You fought… Dream on a public server.” Dream stared at Technoblade like he had grown a second head or something.

“What? Is **Dream** your idol or something?” Technoblade teased, “Cause he isn’t that impressive other than having admin blood on him.”

Dream opened his mouth before he closed it. _That’s impossible. That’s actually impossible._ He didn’t remember dueling Technoblade, “When did this happen?”

“Around… five months ago? Six?” Technoblade shrugged. “All I know was that it happened before this whole… Schlatt presidency.” 

“Right.” Dream looked down, hands clenching the grass. That’s a very big impossible. He swore he was doing something else around that time. If he was right, he had gone out to the village and learned how to sew and bake around that time. It was impossible that he was also dueling Technoblade at the same time.

“Eh, the sun’s going down.” Technoblade muttered, looking up at the sky. “I’ll have to go. That duel was great.”

“If you need someone else to duel, I’m always here.” Dream responded automatically, his mind still reeling at the information.

“Right, you make a better opponent than **Dream** anyways.” Technoblade chuckled and waved, leaving. 

Dream barely realized he was alone in the clearing as his mind reeled back at the thought. 

Of course he was better because whoever fought Technoblade was not him. Whoever Technoblade fought was not the real Dream. 

**_How could it be when he was right there!_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Someone fought Techno and is using Dream's name? Huh, interesting. 
> 
> Let me just say o n e thing. Dueling or sparring is the BEST way to bond, change my mind. 
> 
> :) 
> 
> WHY GET THERAPY WHEN YOU HAVE COTTAGECORE AND BAKING!!


	7. Two More to the List

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream didn't expect two consecutive visitors...
> 
> Two emotionally stunted and unstable visitors...

For the next two weeks, Dream was barely mentally present. Instead of going through with his daily routine, he would sit on his table and think. Sometimes, he’d go outside and sit amidst his flowers and stare off into space, Patches curling up beside him for comfort. The thought had baffled him for days. Someone on this server was using his face and name. No matter how many times he thought about it, he couldn't come up with a name of someone who he invited that could potentially impersonate him. He didn’t know anyone that could easily pull it off. He didn’t know-

Was this why no one went out to find him? Was this why Tubbo didn’t recognize him immediately? Cause there can’t be two Dreams? Did no one notice? W _as this imposter really good at being him? Did George and Sapnap not notice?_ **_Did they think that was him?_ **

His mind spun and spun and he hated how his vision blurred at these thoughts. He took a deep breath and let it out, closing his eyes. He ran a hand through Patches’ fur as he tried to calm himself. He’ll have to gauge more information from whoever will visit. He won’t ask Tubbo, the teen already went through too much. He can ask Technoblade if he comes over. 

He opened his eyes and looked out into the dense forest in front of him. He didn’t know what to think. He didn’t know what to feel. Everything was happening too fast and he can’t wrap his mind around it just yet. He doesn’t know what he can do. Should he go and reveal this imposter? Should he give up on this calm and peaceful life to go back? What would he go back to anyways? Another life of sticking his nose into other people’s business? What would he be proving? Would he still be accepted? 

He shook his head and let out a sigh. He leaned back and lied on the ground, staring into the sky. He has never felt so conflicted in all his life. While he wanted to leave and uncover the imposter, to save his friends from whoever is using his face and name, he also wanted to stay in his little secluded life. He wanted to stay and not have to worry anymore. He wanted to help them in his own way without the manipulation and the pain. He didn’t want to burden his friends with his presence again. So far, it didn’t seem like the imposter was causing anything bad. 

He didn’t know what to do anymore. He just wanted peace and quiet. If he came back, there would be too many questions. There would be too many accusations. Too many judgments. He just wanted to live in peace now. If he went back, he’d be pushed into another war what with what is happening at the moment. He didn’t want to be dragged into conflict again. He didn’t want to be forced into the role of most powerful. He didn’t want to go back to that life ever again. He sighed and draped an arm over his eyes. Maybe he can sleep on it?

He felt a heavy weight on his chest and he let out a small ‘oof’ as he tried to catch his breath. He looked down and blinked when Patches curled up on his chest. He chuckled despite making it harder to breathe on his part. He placed a protective hand over her sleeping form and closed his eyes as well. After his nap, he can go and take care of his crops. It’s been two weeks, the weeds must have taken over. He sighed, maybe he should distract himself with his routine. It sounded a hundred times better than wallowing in his own stupid thoughts.

He tilted his head to the side, staring at the unfinished pond. Right, he still has lots of work to do. He smiled. He can dwell on such dark thoughts later. He has a clearing and a home to take care of. He almost shot up with a start, he needed to travel to the Nether if he wanted to have materials for potion making. He also needed to visit the village, it’s been two weeks since he’s visited them and asked them what was happening. He hummed as he patted Patches softly. She didn’t budge and remained asleep. He blinked and looked down at her. Dream chuckled and laid his head back down. Maybe Patches has the right idea of taking a little mid-noon nap. He closed his eyes and hoped his dark thoughts didn’t carry on to his dreams. 

Dream woke up to Patches hissing. He frowned and groggily pushed himself up. He felt both cursed and blessed to be a light sleeper. After all, Patches already got to know both Tubbo and Technoblade- even showing preference to the latter- which meant someone else was in the clearing. The first thing Dream noticed was the dark skies. His first thought was that Patches must be hissing at a monster and his second thought was that he must’ve slept so much into the day he didn’t notice it got colder. The second thing Dream noticed was that it wasn’t a zombie or a creeper that stood stock still, staring at him in confusion, shock and fear. It was a person.

Dream frowned before letting out a groggy, “What? Who?”  
  


“Uh-”

That was the moment his brain snapped in focus and his body moved on it’s own. He pushed himself up, his axe appearing in his hand as he held the blade to the person’s throat. He blinked his eyes awake as he stared into terrified amber eyes. For a moment there was silence as the person he had threatened quivered in fear and his brain tried to catch up to the current happenings around him. 

“I’m sorry- I’m sorry- I shouldn’t have- please don’t kill me!” The man wailed. 

“What?” Dream reiterated, eyes finally coming into focus and the fog in his mind clearing. He was finally out of his groggy state of mind and he could finally focus on what was happening. “Who are you?”

“I’m- I’m Quackity!” The man stuttered. “I’m sorry for disturbing your sleep, I just thought you died or something and I came to check and-”

Dream tried to wrack his brain for the familiar name. He remembered Tubbo mentioning him as the person who ran against Wilbur with George before joining forces with Schlatt. Looking down at the uniform and red tie that the man adorned confirmed his suspicions. He narrowed his eyes and pressed the axe closer suspiciously, causing Quackity to back up a bit.

“Why are you here?” Dream asked.

“I- I was just walking in the area-”

“You got lost, didn’t you?” Dream deadpanned. He watched as Quackity gave a shaky and sheepish smile, taking a step backwards. He looked disheveled and ready to bolt at the moment's notice. He didn’t know if it was because of the axe at his neck or something else- something more emotional than physical.

Dream lowered his axe and let out a sigh, keeping the axe in his inventory. He eyed Quackity as the man seemed to calm down a bit more. He was still on guard but he seemed more frustrated and emotional than scared now. Dream hummed and gestured for him to follow. He kept an eye on the younger man as he walked towards the cottage. It was dark out and he didn’t think Quackity deserved to be chased out of his clearing with the threat of zombies, skeletons and creepers around the corner. No matter what bad he has done, when they enter his clearing that doesn’t matter anymore. This clearing is a safe space for anyone and everyone. He won’t chase someone in need away. 

“So,” Dream started as he pushed the door open and waited for Quackity to walk in. When he did, he followed and let Patches into the house before he shut the door, “what brings you to get lost in the woods?”

“I- uh- ran off without looking where I was going.” Quackity cleared his throat as he looked around the room.

Dream hummed and leaned against his door with crossed arms. He wondered just how far these emotional men have to run to find his little clearing. He could swear he was far enough from the Greater Dream SMP and L’manberg for him to not be found too easily. He even tried to do a wide circumference of the entire forest, going up to the tallest tree and scanning the area. He was far enough away from anything to be found easily. So, he can’t help but wonder just how far and how emotional does one have to be to run and find his secluded little area from the dense forest. 

He internally deadpanned. Maybe they didn’t run that far and they just got lost on their accord like the emotionally stunted idiots that they were. He can’t blame them, he did the same. Then again, he had run far enough to get away from all the pain and suffering he had caused. He doesn’t think any of the three men he met so far would have that very same thought in mind. This even brought a bigger concern on how far Tubbo had to have traveled with his wounds to find him. How many pearls did he use?

He snapped out of his internal musings when he noticed Quackity was staring at him for a while, “Right, that’s quite a familiar excuse I hear nowadays.”

“Excuse me?” Quackity asked, taken aback.

“I dunno, Tubbo and Technoblade both lost their way and found this clearing.” Dream waved his hand around. “This is the third time I’ve heard that excuse… I won’t be surprised if it won’t be the last.”

Quackity’s eyes had widened and his mouth dropped open when he had mentioned the two. He won’t be surprised if he felt scared of him, after all he had just named two of his current enemies right now. Dream internally sighed at that thought. He hated thinking that. It felt weird. 

“You- you know- You know Tubbo and Technoblade?” Quackity stumbled over his own words, hands wringing the ends of his blazer. 

“I do. I met Tubbo a little earlier than the… famed festival of yours,” Dream tried not to feel satisfaction at the way Quackity flinched at the mention of the festival, “we talked… then the next time he came back, he was all bloodied and he died in front of me. Then, when he felt better because of my help and potions, I let him leave. Technoblade stumbled upon my clearing just a few moments after.”

“Oh…” Quackity swallowed, looking down on the floor as he shifted.

“They told me a lot of stories.” Dream drawled, stalking forward. With the added intimidation of Patches circling around Quackity, Dream wouldn’t be surprised if he was absolutely terrified. 

_Good,_ _let him feel the fear that Tubbo undoubtedly felt. Let him feel the pressure he put Technoblade under when he ordered him to execute his ally._

“Really now?” Quackity forced out a nervous laugh. “What kind of stories?”

“Stories of an election held in a country. Stories of exile and running away.” Dream enumerated slowly, circling around Quackity. “Stories of a festival, of execution… of pain and anguish.”

Quackity swallowed, “Look, I know I did some pretty bad things but most of them were orders from Schlatt! I- I didn’t want Technoblade to execute Tubbo! I thought he was just going to berate him or oust him as a traitor- a spy! But no! He asked for an execution and I didn’t know what to do and-”

Dream walked over and placed a heavy hand on Quackity’s shoulder. He flinched at the contact and looked up at him with fearful eyes, “I don’t know about you and this country of yours but I’d prefer that my clearing be known for it being a safe space for people to speak and let out their emotions.”

Dream can hate Quackity all he wants for allowing Tubbo to get hurt. He could put all the blame on Quackity for ruining Tommy and Tubbo’s already peaceful life. He could antagonize him and make him out to be the villain. He could even try and kill him, he had all the power in this clearing. He could but he won’t. He won’t because he left that part of his life behind. He won’t because he promised to help whoever stumbled into his clearing. He looked down at the fearful yet confused look in Quackity’s eyes and sighed.

“This place is a safe space, Quackity.” Dream explained. “All conflict is left outside these lands. I don’t care what side you are on, what you’ve done… All I care about is that you can let go and be at peace while you’re here.”

“You- you can’t be serious.” Quackity muttered.

“I’m serious.” Dream looked towards his kitchen, “Now, I have a feeling you have some heavy baggage on you. Why don’t we have some calming tea and you can talk to me about everything. Hm?”

“Right…” Quackity let himself be led to the table and sat down. He fiddled with his tie in his hands before he looked up to stare at the back of his head. “Who are you anyways?”

“Call me Clay.” Dream responded. He walked into the kitchen and began to prepare tea. He did this on purpose to allow Quackity to calm down and sort through his thoughts. He wanted to speak to him when he has a stable mindset and he isn’t on the verge of crying, running or both. He sighed when the kettle finally let out a long and high pitched whistle. He placed the kettle and some cups on a tray and brought them out. 

The first thing he noticed was how Quackity was partially relaxed. Partially because he was being stared down by Patches, her head tilted as she sat on the table. He noticed how Quackity’s eyes darted to him and he paled even more. Dream chuckled and brought the tray to the table. He set it down and watched as Patches got the idea and jumped down from the table. She stretched and let out a yawn before she walked to the stairs and disappeared upstairs. He turned back and handed a cup to Quackity. He poured some steaming hot tea for the both of them before he sat with his hands intertwined together, waiting for Quackity to speak. 

Quackity took the hot tea into his hands and stared down at the boiling liquid that emitted steam. He breathed in and let it out, “Schlatt is a fucking asshole.”

“So I’ve heard.” Dream mused.

“He- I didn’t expect him to pull that stupid execution play! I was just expecting him to oust Tubbo as a spy then maybe like send him running or something. I didn’t expect a full on execution from Technoblade of all people as well!” Quackity spilled, one hand holding his cup of tea while the other waved around to make a point. “Then- then the asshole had the audacity to tear down the White House! The White House! He already tore down the fucking walls and everything else but no- that isn’t enough for him apparently and he wants to tear down the fucking White House as well!” 

Dream nodded along to his rant, “Does this White House carry anything… significant to you that he knows about?”

Quackity seethed, “It fucking does. It was the first thing I seriously built when I transferred here.” 

Dream flinched. Everyone’s first build always had a special place in their heart. The Community House was one of which that he held dear in his heart. It was something he had built with his friends. Something they had started together. It was a symbol of their friendship and their connection with one another. It was a symbol of their bond to one another, something that can never break or waver. Even when he is this far from them, he missed them and wished they were at his side. 

“He had the- he fucking started destroying it to my face and even asked me to help him! Like he doesn’t know that I built that with my blood sweat and tears!” Quackity slammed a fist on the table, “I- he taunted me. He taunted me and I shot him. I shot him dead- I just- I couldn’t take it anymore. I met Tommy- he said- he said he saw everything and that Pogtopia is willing to take me in but I- I don’t know.”

“Why do you not know, Quackity?” Dream tilted his head to the side with a frown.

“There’s a reason why I ran against Wilbur in the first place.” All the fight seemed to leave Quackity as he let out a long sigh and set his hand down. He took a sip of the slightly cold tea before he continued, his eyes drooping. “He- if he had been the leader- the president… it’s just going to be the same. It’ll just come out worse, who knows? Wilbur he’s- I don’t think he’s fit for the position.”

“I see…” Dream hummed in understanding. “Why don’t you sleep on it? Think it through and you can make your decision tomorrow.”

“Wait- what? I- I can’t just stay here-”

“There’s an extra room in there with an extra bed for you.” Dream smiled warmly. He stood up and collected the cups and the kettle and placed them on the tray. “You can stay, it’s too late and there are monsters everywhere. This place is way too far from whatever country you are in for you to reach it in time.”

“I- fine.” Quackity shuffled in his spot. He took off his blazing and ripped off his tie in frustration.

Dream gave him a quick glance and smiled, “I take it you won’t be going back to Schlatt?”

“Fuck no.” Quackity scowled. 

“Right, have a good night.” Dream gestured into the room. Quackity mumbled his greeting back and walked inside. Dream closed the door softly behind Quackity and leaned against the door. His eyes scanned the main room of his house and he walked to the table. He leaned over it and finished his cup of tea. He poured himself another one as he sat down and pinched the bridge of his nose, “How- what happened while I was gone? How did everything go to shit this quickly? Damn…”

Dream shook his head and moved upstairs. Once he had Patches with him, he laid on his bed and closed his eyes. He’ll deal with all of this the next day. He’s just exhausted today, what with the knowledge of a supposed imposter and how Wilbur had changed as well. As he closed his eyes, he hoped Wilbur was still that charismatic and moral leader. A man who was his opposite in more ways than one. 

When daylight reached his clearing, he pushed himself up and looked back at Quackity who was at the table. He chuckled and greeted him, “Hey.”

“Hey, I- uh. Thank you for letting me stay the night and… and letting me rant.” Quackity smiled hesitantly. “I feel so much better.”

Dream smiled and waved him off, “Any time. You can come back if you want some place to relax.”

Quackity nodded as he waved, “I’ll keep that in mind.”

When Quackity left, Dream was back to his own thoughts. He pushed them all away. He had a farm and a pond to fix up after weeks of neglect. He shook his head at his stupidity, he should’ve known better. Days flew by and Dream was back to his comfortable routine of checking on his farms and finally caring for the few fish he had added to his pond. He had to stop Patches from jumping in to catch one multiple times. 

He shook his head as he watched the fish swim. It reminded him of Sapnap’s fish and he wondered how he was doing at that moment. As he sighed and looked longingly at the pond, from the corner of his eyes he noticed a figure stumble into his clearing. He shot up and approached them carefully, eyeing their battered clothes and shaky stature. When the stranger looked up, Dream almost gasped. He could barely recognize Wilbur with his dirty clothing, large eyebags and empty eyes. It was like he was looking at a different person. 

“Who-”

“Who are you?” Wilbur hissed, stumbling back. His eyes were wild and he looked ready to hit whoever was in his way.

“I’m Clay.” Dream spoke slowly, showing both of his hands to the paranoid man. “Who are you?”

“I- I’m… Wilbur.” Wilbur trailed off, narrowing his eyes in suspicion. “Are you- are you the same Clay that Tubbo and Techno have been talking about.”

“Yeah.” Dream smiled placatingly, “I am.”

“I-”

“Is there something wrong, Wilbur?” Dream asked, slowly approaching the man.

His eyes watered and he dropped to the floor, “I don’t know.”

Dream resisted the urge to run up and hug him. He can’t do that to a potentially snappish person, it’d only make things worse, “Wilbur, can you- do you want me to come closer?”

“Yes, god- yes please.” Wilbur sobbed, hugging his torso as he clutched his tattered jacket. “I- I don’t know what to do anymore.”

“It’s fine, you’re fine.” Dream whispered, coming closer and gathering the sobbing man into his arms. “You can tell me everything.”

That was when the dam broke and Wilbur clutching him close and started spewing out nonsense. Dream sighed and carded a hand through his curly brown hair. He noticed how matted and dirty it was. He shook his head and hugged him tightly. 

“Wilbur, Wilbur listen to me.” Dream interrupted, “Listen to me and follow after me, please.”

Wilbur merely nodded, his face buried in Dream’s shoulder. Dream hummed and patted his back.

“Breathe in.” Dream instructed, “1, 2, 3, 4.”

Wilbur followed his instructions and Dream smiled. 

“Now hold it for 7.” Dream continued. “1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7.”

Dream can vaguely remember learning this from George, back when Bad had a breakdown over the loss of his fish. It had helped calm Bad down and made him speak better without sounding like gibberish.

“Now, exhale for 8.” Dream instructed. “1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8.”

Wilbur’s shaking had lessened and his sobs sounded quieter and less loud. Dream let out a sigh of relief as Wilbur began to slowly calm down. 

“Good. Now repeat.”

They both repeated the breathing exercise and Dream was glad to find that Wilbur merely trembled in his arms and stopped shaking. His grip was still tight and Dream still had him in his arms. When Wilbur had finally calmed down, the tears streaming down his face had slowed and he hiccuped instead of sobbed.

“Are you alright now?” Dream whispered, pushing Wilbur’s hair away from his face.

Wilbur nodded, “Thank you.”

“Good, that’s good. Now, can you repeat what you wanted to tell me?” Dream asked slowly, eyes searching Wilbur’s face. Instead of paranoia and fear, he only saw resignation, sadness and regret. 

“I- I just want to blow it all up, Clay.” Wilbur sniffled, wiping his hands over his face. 

Dream shushed him, taking his hands away before he would rub his face raw. The older man seemed to be in so much emotional pain that he forgot all about physical pain. He stared at the bloodshot eyes as they looked back at him in desperation, “What do you want to blow up?”

“L’manberg- Manberg- I don’t care anymore.” He cried out. “I just want it gone.”

“Why?” Dream asked, his voice soothing and low.

“It- it’s taunting me, Clay.” Wilbur answered, his voice hysterical. “It- no one knows what they’re fighting for anymore! They all- they just want Schlatt gone. They never wanted L’manberg. They just- I don’t- I can’t do this anymore.”

“It’s going to be fine. You’re going to be fine.”

“They’re going to hate me!” He howled, burying his face back on Dream’s shoulder. Dream rubbed circles on his back as he listened, “They’re going to hate me for blowing it all up!”

“You don’t have to.” Dream whispered.

“But I do.”

“Who told you that?” Dream pulled back and swiped the tears away from Wilbur’s face.

Wilbur sniffed and leaned into Dream’s comforting hand, “ **Dream** did.”

Dream stiffened and his eyes widened as he stared at Wilbur. It can’t be. It shouldn’t be. There’s no way. How dare- How dare that imposter enable such behavior? How dare that imposter take a charismatic and lovable young man and break him until all he wants to do is blow it all up. How dare that imposter allow this to happen in the first place. 

No…

_How dare he not be there for his friends when they were suffering the most._

He brought Wilbur back into a shaky embrace, his eyes watering at the thought of everyone thinking it was him. His emotions raging a war in his head as he realized that his friends, his family, might think of him as a big villain. He can’t go back now. Not ever. 

“You’ll be alright, Wilbur.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.” Dream tightened the hug. He looked up and stared off into the woods. Nothing was going the right way. Tubbo and Tommy are in their last life, who knows what happened to Technoblade and Quackity is somewhere out there. The man in his arms was mentally unstable and was planning to blow something up. Dream shook his head and closed his eyes. He listened to Wilbur’s breathing as it went from erratic to calm and steady.

“You- what if I want to blow it up?” Wilbur whimpered.

“Then you do what you want.” Dream sighed. “You don’t- this is your country, Wilbur. You don’t- you don’t have to seek other people’s affirmations and opinions.”

“You… think so?” Wilbur looked up, his eyes broken and pleading.

Dream hesitated, “I think so. You- do what you think is best for you.” 

He didn’t know what to say. He was truly at a bind. He didn’t want to encourage Wilbur but he had a feeling if he berated him for it he’d only get pushed further into insanity. Right now, Wilbur needed someone to ground him. Someone to remind him of what he truly wanted and not what someone else says he wants.

“You do- you do what you think you want. Don’t let other people dictate what you want to do.” Dream whispered, carding a hand through Wilbur’s hair. “I- The only thing you need to remember is to stay safe.” 

“Safe?”

“Stay alive.” 

Wilbur flinched at that. He clung tighter to Dream and closed his eyes, “I can’t promise that.”

“Wilbur…”

“I- I don’t- I’ll be betraying my family…” Wilbur whispered.

“Wilbur-”

“Clay, you- you’re the only one who-” Wilbur sniffed. “I don’t know anymore. I can’t- I want to blow it all up.”

Dream licked his lips, patting Wilbur’s hair. His friend was far too gone. The stress, the anger and the paranoia had gotten to him. Everything just didn’t feel right for him anymore and Dream can’t do anything about it. Not now, not ever.

“Then… Then all I can say is that I’ll be there for you.” Dream whispered.

Wilbur sniffed, hugging him tighter, “I don’t know why but- but you have such a calming presence and-”

“I’m here.” Dream restated. 

He’ll be there for the friend he had abandoned. He’ll be there for the friend that had fallen to the deep end. He’ll be there.

**_He promises._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha, don't you just love unstable characters?? I do. I do...
> 
> ALSO MORE FANART ??? I'M IN LOVE <33
> 
> [FANART (1)](https://www.instagram.com/p/CKsmn6ZHW3M/?igshid=1kyhn1bo3qins)
> 
> [FANART (2)](https://twitter.com/creatiling/status/1355492050024554498?s=19)


	8. Pieces of Paper for Your Thoughts?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream gains a new coping mechanism...
> 
> Is it healthy? :)

Dream continued to hold onto Wilbur as he continued to shake, whether from sadness, anger or insanity- Dream didn’t want to know. He sighed and continued to run a hand through Wilbur’s hair, soothing the older man. He felt so useless. How could he help his friend out of this hole he’s dug for himself? How could he bring him back when he’s too far gone? How could he bring back the light in his eyes when all he saw was darkness and despair?

“Wilbur… are you hungry?” Dream whispered instead. If he can’t help the man mentally, he could do it physically. He noticed how thin he had looked. How he looked more lanky than before, less fuller than he last saw him. 

“I- yeah.”

“Come on, I have some food in my house.” Dream stated kindly, pulling him up. He led Wilbur to his home carefully, watching as Patches edged around them, sniffing the air. She held her head high and walked away. Dream chuckled softly at that and let her run off to wherever she felt comfortable. 

When they walked into the house, Dream helped Wilbur settle down on the chair. He ruffled his hair and walked to the kitchen to prepare something really quick. If Tubbo was correct in saying that he and Tommy were living in some kind of ravine, then that meant they didn’t have enough supplies. Dream sighed as he plated two pork chops and brought it out for Wilbur. He set it down in front of the man and smiled encouragingly. 

“Here, it’s all yours.”

Right at that moment, Wilbur’s stomach growled and he flushed a slight red. He coughed in embarrassment while Dream chuckled, “Thank you, Clay.”

Dream watched in satisfaction as Wilbur ate, his face lighting up at the taste, “Is it good?”

“Yeah. Techno is- he’s great and all but I think I’m sick of baked potatoes by now. If I see another potato I might scream.” Wilbur explained in between bites. 

Dream chuckled and leaned against the table, “He is known for his potato farming.”

They fell into a comfortable silence as Wilbur ate the delicious food. Dream hummed and tapped a finger on the table. He closed his eyes and listened to the peaceful sounds around them. Dream jerked when he heard the scraping of the chair. He turned and looked at Wilbur.

“You’re leaving?” Dream asked. 

“I- I need to go.” Wilbur tugged on the sleeves of his coat, pulling at them. “I- I want to think on my own.”

Dream hesitated, reaching out to Wilbur. He paused and let his hand fall, “If- if that’s what you want. Stay safe and alive, Wilbur.” 

“I- I’ll try.” Wilbur gave a hesitant grin. He waved weakly as he walked out.

Dream didn’t want him to go. He wanted to keep Wilbur here with him and stop him from walking into his death. He wanted to keep him safe and away from all the stress and paranoia. He wanted to keep him away from everything. He wanted to keep him away from the imposter. He just wanted to keep him safe. But he knew- he knew that keeping him here would make him fall further. It would deteriorate his sanity even more. He shook his head and ran a hand through his hair in frustration.

“I just- I want to help.” Dream whispered, leaning against the table with his head in his hand. “But I don’t know how.” 

The door was pawed open, he didn’t realize that Wilbur didn’t close the door properly, and Patches walked in. He looked down at her as she walked around his legs, her tail tickling his ankles. He chuckled and bent down to pick her up.

“I wanted to do something productive today.” Dream sighed. He ran a hand through his hair and walked out into his clearing. “How can I- I can’t even sort through my thoughts…”

Dream sighed and looked around the clearing. He hummed and looked around for Patches. When he found her, he crouched down and let her jump on his shoulders. He chuckled and stood up, “Let’s visit the village, shall we?” 

Patches meowed on his shoulder, curling up and resting her head beside his face. He walked towards the village’s general direction. His mind wandered as he passed through the familiar shrubbery that surrounded him. Just how much changed while he was gone? Just how big was the conflict? Was it bigger than he had imagined? How much meddling did his imposter do? What did he cause to bring Wilbur down to the ground? How much blood has been shed while he was gone?

How powerful was this imposter? He needed to know more of his supposed actions. He needed to know what this imposter had done. He wanted to know how much **he** had hurt his friends. He needed to know what to do to make it up to them. What exactly was this imposter doing? W _hat was he thinking? Why was he doing this? Who was he? What did he gain from doing this? Should he go and stop it? Do his friends realize it’s not him?_ **_Or do they really think he’s capable of doing it? Do they really-_ **

Dream breathed in and let it out. He looked up and noticed he was already at the village. He must’ve been so engrossed in his thoughts that he didn’t realize how far he had gone. He shook his head to clear his thoughts and walked into the village with a smile. Despite the smile and the usual cheery greetings he gave to the villagers around him, they still must’ve felt his distress as they hummed and grunted in concern. He waved it off until the cleric walked up and placed a heavy hand on his shoulder. He grunted and locked eyes with Dream.

Dream paused and sighed, “I’m fine, I promise. I just- I have a lot of things I want to do and my thoughts are a mess.” 

The villager hummed in contemplation, as if understanding his plight. The cleric motioned for him to follow and he did despite his confusion. Dream looked around at the place he had entered. It wasn’t the cleric’s usual home with the potion stands and the many cabinets full of ingredients. Instead, they had entered a library, shelves with books towering above them. He ran a hand through the spines of the books, reading each golden calligraphy detailing the titles of the old and worn books. Dust settled on his fingertips but it didn’t matter as he gazed around him in awe. He stopped when a book was placed in his hands.

“What…?”

The cleric hummed, gesturing at the book. Dream looked down and flipped it open, staring down at the empty, white pages. He blinked and looked up, giving the cleric a confused look. He hummed in explanation and Dream’s mouth shaped a small ‘o’ in realization.

“A… diary?” Dream asked, stopping in the middle of the book and running a hand down the smooth paper. “I- I don’t need-”

The cleric grunted, staring at him intensely. Dream stopped and gave a sheepish grin, closing the book. He looked down at the leather bound book and traced his finger over the plain cover and spine. It was a newly crafted book, it wasn’t even stamped with a title or name. He held it in his hands and looked back up at the cleric.

“You’re sure?” Dream whispered, “I can- I can sort out my thoughts with this?”

The cleric nodded and walked out, waiting for him to follow. Dream floundered before he followed him as well, Patches not once falling from his shoulders. He followed the cleric through the village until they reached the blacksmith. Before Dream knew, he spent the rest of the day forging his own little stamp to place on the leather cover. He huffed and heated the stamp before laying it over the leather book. When it cooled off, he looked down at the cover that now held a title.

_Fleeting Thoughts_

He wanted to name it his diary but with the knowledge of his friends coming over he cannot risk them finding out in that way. He didn’t want them to find his book and take the wrong idea. He sighed and placed the book in his inventory, looking up at the blacksmith who had helped him. He gave a grateful smile which was returned with a grunt. He walked out, watching as the village children played around with Patches, his cat chasing them around playfully. He chuckled and watched as they played around. 

Before he could do anything to call Patches over, some villagers approached him with clothing in their arms. He blinked down as they shoved it into his arms, patting his shoulder before they left. He chuckled. They knew him already. They knew if they didn’t leave immediately, he’d try and give it back. He shook his head and placed the clothing into his inventory, he’ll sort through them later. He whistled and crouched down, letting Patches jump up on his shoulders. He chuckled and ruffled the children’s hair, smiling at them.

“I’ll visit with her again so you can play with her.” Dream assured, standing up. The children exchanged excited murmurs while Patches mewled disappointingly. He rolled his eyes and patted Patches on the head, “Don’t be such a sourpuss.” 

He waved to the villagers, moving to leave with a smile. The sun was starting to set and he needed to get back home. He hummed a little tune as he walked, his mind clear for once. Maybe he should go visit the village more, it made him calmer than usual. It made him feel safe and whole. He smiled to himself as he finally reached his home, the sun already at the horizon. He walked into his home and closed the door behind him, Patches jumping off his shoulder. He sighed and got out his inventory, looking down at the book that was stamped with a title. 

If he wanted to start with a habit, it was better to start now.

* * *

**_Entry 1_ **

**_I had just gotten back from the village and gotten this book and some new clothes as a gift. The cleric said that it would be healthier to write down my thoughts instead of internalizing everything. I kind of agree which is why I’m writing right now. The past days have been stressful. Tubbo lost a life and I learned that I had actually killed my friends in the control room with poison overdose. I already regret agreeing to the duel against Tommy._ ** **_W ~~hy did I have to agree? Everything went wrong when I even started the stupid war~~_ ** **_. Not only that but Technoblade visited and he admitted he fought me. ME. He said he had fought Dream. Dream. I don’t remember ever fighting him before now. I don’t even remember speaking to him in such casual terms, ever, much less fight him in a duel._ **

**_Everything seems to be going wrong, maybe even worse, since I left. I don’t know what happened but Quackity is now against Schlatt and Wilbur is falling into insanity._ **~~**_I don’t know if I should go back, should I go back? Everything is going bad without me._ **~~ **_There’s apparently an imposter of me running around, telling Wilbur that blowing something up was the right way to go and fighting Technoblade in duels. It feels so… surreal. I don’t know what to think. I want to help but going back might make things worse._ **

~~**_What if they’ll hate me? What if the imposter disappears to leave me to clean up their mess? Who is this imposter? What do they want? What do they gain from doing this? I just want to live peacefully, was that too much to ask? Do I have to go back? Do I have to help again? What do I do? I don’t want to be manipulative again, I don’t want to use them- I don’t want_ ** ~~

* * *

Dream let out a sigh and closed his eyes. He crossed out some words, feeling a bit of satisfaction in seeing the words get written over. He felt lighter. He opened his eyes and signed the page. That’s enough writing about his thoughts for a while. He closed the book and kept it in his inventory. It was safer to keep it with him anyways. He hummed and turned to look at his home. Maybe he can decorate the upper part of his home or bake another pie, he missed eating something sweet. He smiled as he thought about Tubbo’s recipe. He ended up baking not just pie but some cookies as well.

* * *

**_Entry 2_ **

**_I managed to get enough resources to make a Nether Portal. I went into the Nether to scout out the area. After that, I decided to go and start making a basement to my home. I plan on making a brewery and enchanting room once I travel through the Nether more. I also managed to fix up my farm after the weeks of my shocked state. I’m glad I was able to salvage it before the weeds could take over or it shriveled up with the lack of water. I don’t know what I’d do if it got ruined._ ** ~~**_It’d be another death on my hands, like proof that I can’t ever keep anything alive._ **~~

**_Other than that, the animals have been fine despite my lack of care during those weeks. Patches help me calm down sometimes and I love running a hand through her fur. Tubbo hasn’t visited me yet, maybe it was because he is busy now that they’re planning on going against Schlatt for real? Technoblade didn’t visit either so I don’t have any information anymore. Quackity and Wilbur were a one time thing that I didn’t expect would come back since they only needed emotional stability and didn't have that much trust in me._ ** ~~**_I can’t blame them, I ruined everything after all. I was a horrible friend. I can’t be trusted._ **~~

**_I wonder how Tubbo and Technoblade are doing. They seemed pretty shaken up about the festival. Not only that but I wonder how Tommy has been doing. I hope he keeps his cheerful and loud nature. They were things that were so endearing about him. It wouldn’t be good if he lost that because of this war. I hope he doesn’t change despite all the wars happening._ **

**_Sometimes I wonder what is wrong with me… Tommy and Tubbo are both too young for this life. Maybe I should’ve given them freedom earlier. Maybe I shouldn’t have gone to war with them._ ** **_~~What was I thinking? I was stupid, I feel stupid. Thinking back, I feel so stupid and selfish. I was a horrible person.~~ _ **

**_-Dream_ **

* * *

**_Entry 3_ **

**_I feel calmer now. I have fallen back into the familiar routine of doing my tasks and fixing up the place. The basement is slowly coming together and all I need to do is craft the enchantment table and the brewing stands. I already stocked up the place for any of my needs. I have yet to completely traverse the Nether and I haven’t found a fortress yet. I have taken it upon myself to kill any stray blazes that were lingering nearby. I have collected very few blaze rods, enough for making brewing stands and to keep myself stocked for brewing._ **

**_I decided to visit the village to trade for more materials for my basement. I brought Patches with me again and she played with the young children. She complained afterwards though, it was hilarious. I baked two cakes today and I gifted one to the village after visiting. They were really grateful and thanked me endlessly but it should be me thanking them for their company and warm welcomes._ **

**_Despite all these things occupying my thoughts, I still can’t shake the feeling of dread and unease whenever I think about someone impersonating me… What is he doing? What kind of things is he pulling using my name and face? What horrible things do I have to fix? What horrible things do_ ** **_they_ ** **_think I’ve done? I feel so trapped and alone… I want to help them but at the same time I can’t._ ** **_W ~~hat do I do? What do I do??? Everything is too confusing… Do I go back? Do I stay???~~_ **

~~**_Even worse, I could feel Phil had arrived… I know he’s here but why?_ ** ~~

**_I don’t know what I want… I might have to stay here and sort through my thoughts. It’s better like this anyways. At least this way my friends have a way to escape all the stress and pain. At least this way I can help them without manipulating them and ruining their peace. At least this way…_ **

**_-Dream_ **

* * *

He closed his eyes and snapped the book shut. He let out a breath as he flexed his fingers. Writing felt therapeutic. Maybe he should try and write a novel in his spare time. Despite how sore his wrist feels after writing for long periods, he could get used to it. He opened his eyes and massaged his wrist, looking down at his diary. He hummed and kept it in his inventory, night was coming fast and he left Patches in the flower patch. He hummed and pushed his door open, Patches would’ve come inside as he didn’t close it but she hasn’t yet. When he looked up, he found out why. 

“Oh, hello!” A transparent man looked up, smiling brightly at him. Under his hand was Patches who was purring and enjoying the touch. 

Dream’s mouth was dry. He blinked, hoping against hope that he was hallucinating but he wasn’t. It was real.

_The person he asked to stay alive is now a ghost…_

“Wil...bur?” Dream choked out, reaching out and walking closer hesitantly.

“Hello! I know you!” The ghost- apparition- whatever stated happily. “Alivebur must’ve had good memories of you!”

“A- good memories… of me?” Dream asked weakly, pointing at himself. 

“Yes! You’re… Clay, right?”

“Yeah…” Dream swallowed, looking up at the bright and innocent eyes of the ghost. “I am.”

  
  
“Well, I’m Ghostbur! You have a really nice cat.” He admitted shyly, smiling at him. 

“Thank you…” Dream looked up at the sky that was slowly gaining stars. “Do you- do you want to stay the night?”

“Yes, I do!” Ghostbur smiled, following him after he picked up Patches. He sighed and closed the door, smiling a bit when Ghostbur kept looking around in awe. Then, there was a pause. “I’m sorry.”

“Excuse me?” Dream looked up, blinking.

  
  
“For what it’s worth…” Ghostbur swallowed, fiddling with the end of his sweater. Dream didn’t know how long ago it was that Wilbur last wore that sweater. “I- I’m sorry.”

“Why?”  
  


“I don’t know but I- I feel like I did… Well, Alivebur did a lot of bad things when he was alive… at least that’s what I’m told.” Ghostbur explained, waving his hand around a bit. “But… this- this doesn’t feel like something necessarily bad… It feels like… a broken promise?”

Dream had to stop himself from tearing up. He swallowed thickly, moving forward and pulling the specter into his arms, “It’s alright.”

**_I don’t know what I want… What do I do?_ **

**_-Dream_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I oop!! Writing as a coping mechanism?? Been there done that :D
> 
> Please someone save this man before he self-destructs :)
> 
> Also, GHOSTBUR :D
> 
> I started this chapter with Vilbur break down and I end it with Dream breakdown while hugging Ghostbur :)


	9. Roommate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream gains a new roommate :D
> 
> But before that, insecurities come to light...

Dream sighed, pushing himself up from his bed. Sleep weighed heavily on his eyes but he shook his head and rubbed at them to clear his thoughts. Yesterday was a ride and a half, what with the appearance of Wilbur- or Ghostbur, as he now calls himself. He sighed and dragged a hand down his face, letting his hand fall on his lap. He didn’t know what to do. If he didn’t know what to do before, more so now. He leaned back, letting his back rest against the wall. He didn’t know if Ghostbur needed to sleep or not but he did give him the extra room. He closed his eyes and let out a breath, dwelling on the problem won’t fix anything. At least, not significantly. 

It had still jarred him so much to see the charismatic and loveable leader- the man who he had fought against- dead. It had shocked him to his core and he didn’t know what to do about it all. He opened his eyes when he felt Patches climb on his lap and purr. He chuckled and ran a hand through the soft fur, letting himself relax a bit. 

_Wilbur is dead and it was all his fault._

He stiffened at the thought and stopped his hand from clenching around Patches and hurting her. He shook his head and scowled, glaring at the floor as he sorted through his thoughts. It wasn’t his fault. He couldn’t have done anything else he would reveal himself. He couldn’t do anything against his impersonator. At least, not yet. He didn’t have enough information about him to go in guns blazing. He can’t just come back after a year of radio silence. It wasn’t his fault.

_Right?_

He sighed and sunk down, letting his shoulders droop as he felt the weight of the world settle on him again. He hated having admin blood. He hated having all these responsibilities dumped on him. He hated having to _take_ responsibility over anything. He just wanted to live with his friends and have fun. He just wanted to smile and laugh and build and lead a happy life. He didn’t want to be faced with war, conflict and political fights. He didn’t want to fight his friends and kill anyone. He just wanted peace. 

_Was that too much to ask?_

He closed his eyes and leaned back, letting Patches jump off his lap. He looked towards the door that led to the extra room and jumped when he saw Ghostbur standing- or floating- there with a hesitant smile. He blinked before he let out a sigh and pushed himself off his bed, giving Ghostbur a small hesitant smile back. He dusted himself off and slowly approached the ghost, fearing that he might scare him away.

“Are you okay?” Dream asked him, reaching out hesitantly. 

“Yeah, I just-” Ghostbur paused before he shifted and smiled widely. “I’m just glad to have found you! Alivebur didn’t have a lot of memories about you but I get this warm fuzzy feeling when I’m with you.”

Dream paused and blinked, trying so hard not to cry in front of the ghost. This was not Wilbur, this was not the friend who jokingly asked him out on a date. This was not the charismatic leader he went head to head against. This was not the Wilbur he knew and could apologize to for the war. This was an imitation of Wilbur who lost his memories. He’d have to look into the code for that glitch. This wasn’t supposed to happen. He sniffed and nodded, smiling at Ghostbur. “That’s nice to hear.”

“I’m glad to see you have a nice home!” Ghostbur noted, looking around with a smile. “When I appeared, the others didn’t look all that fine.”

“Oh?” Dream raised an eyebrow as he moved to the kitchen, intent on preparing food for them both. While Ghostbur was a ghost, he still needed the normal needs any other person would need. 

“Oh yeah! Tubbo was just reconstructing a place called New L’manberg!” Ghostbur beamed, clapping his hands a bit. “Something about it being blown up and having to rebuild!”

Dream paused at the doorway to the kitchen, the hand he placed on the frame had tensed and gripped the frame tightly. He turned back and glanced at Ghostbur who had already gotten distracted by Patches and was playing with her. Dream sighed and turned around, closing his eyes as he steadied his breathing. So that meant Wilbur had blown it up. He had blown it up because of the imposter. 

Dream almost broke the frame he was holding and he breathed in. He had to stay calm. Getting mad or sad over something he cannot control is stupid. It would just be a waste of energy and time. He will think about those things when he gets more information. It was simple. Just get more information about this imposter and formulate a plan around it. He was good at that. Formulating plans with limited information. It was nothing new. He will succeed. 

He closed his eyes and walked into the kitchen. He busied himself with preparing the food and ended up baking some cookies along the way. They came out a bit misshapen but he tasted one and he smiled. It was good. He chuckled and brought the plates outside, placing the plate of cookies in the middle. Dream looked back to smile at Ghostbur and gesture at the food. “Shall we?”

“Ooh! Are those cookies!” Ghostbur smiled, pointing at the sweets.

“Yes, yes they are.” Dream smiled, sitting down. “You can take them.”

“Thank you!” Ghostbur beamed. He grabbed a cookie and munched on it. He turned and nodded at Dream, “I think I know why Alivebur liked being here!”  
  


“Right.” Dream smiled sadly at Ghostbur.

Ghostbur must’ve noticed his sadness as Ghostbur opened his inventory. Dream blinked when Ghostbur shoved something clear in color to his hands. He looked down at it before looking up at the specter.

“Uh?”

“It’s blue!” Ghostbur smiled. “It takes away your sadness, try it!”

Dream blinked and smiled. He took the stone from his hands and watched as it turned into a deep blue color. He chuckled, feeling a lot lighter than usual. He looked down at the rock that went from being a pale white to a dark blue. It seemed like his brother had noticed the needs of the ghost and reached into the code to fit the item to match what the ghost wanted. He chuckled fondly. 

With a start, he realized something. His brother could easily be the imposter. There was a pause as Dream stared down at the blue rock in contemplation. They did look quite similar to each other and last he had checked the code, Drista had also gone to the Overworld and played around. But, Dee would never allow anyone to turn into a ghost. Even so, he would have kept an eye on the code to ensure no one was glitched. He internally groaned. Of course, he forgot about his siblings during his little peaceful escapade. 

He sighed and set down the blue rock on the table, taking a bite of his steak. He looked at Ghostbur who had brought the entire plate of cookies with him as he played with Patched. Dream smiled and chuckled, shaking his head. He set his thoughts about his siblings aside for the moment, he does have Ghostbur to deal with and his little clearing to take care of. He stood up and placed a hand on the cold shoulder of the ghost, “Do you like the cookies?”

“Definitely!” Ghostbur nodded. 

“You can bring them with you.” Dream smiled, ruffling his hair. 

Ghostbur smiled, “Thank you! I have to go to Tubbo and share this! I’ll tell him you said hi!”

Before Dream could reach out and stop Ghostbur, the specter had already dashed out with the plate of cookies in his hand. The door remained open as Dream raised an eyebrow at the gaping piece of wood. He chuckled and crouched down, petting Patches when she mewled in disappointment. He went from crouching to sitting on the floor, chuckling as he played around with Patches. He closed his eyes and let Patches move from her spot to settle on his lap. He didn’t know what to do, what a shocker. 

He chuckled and opened his eyes, tracing patterns and battle plans on the wood. Nowadays he can’t seem to know what to do anymore. The man who was once praised for creating plans on the fly was now at a loss of what to do, how ironic. He shook his head and smiled ruefully, how truly ironic. So many things about him were just ironic. The most powerful and yet he can’t do anything. He has admin blood and yet he never used it. How useless can he be? He scratched at the floor, digging his nails on the hardwood. He was so useless. He had fought a useless war against children and people he had once called friends. He had killed them without even knowing. He had ran away and now all he did was sit and wait, like some useless god. A forgotten god. 

He snorted and moved his hand away from the wood, looking down at his chipped nails. He must’ve scratched at the ground too hard. He hummed and leaned back, looking at the ceiling of his home. He felt useless and he probably was. Out there was some kind of imposter, wearing his skin and using his name and what does he do? He bakes cookies for a ghost. He chuckled dryly, he truly has his priorities right, huh?

He looked down when the weight on his lap left. He watched idly as Patches stretched in front of him and walked away, her tail swishing behind her. He smiled and pushed himself to a crouch, letting his head hang as he stared at the floor for a moment. His mind was whirling with so many scenarios where he was more useful. Where he wasn’t just some kind of sitting rock. He huffed and stood up, dusting himself off. He can find a way to be useful. He just needed more information. 

“How much is information worth these days?” Dream muttered to himself, playing with the end of his braid. He shook his head and undid his braid, combing his fingers through his silky locks. When he straightened his hair out, he bit on his hair tie and pulled his hair into a ponytail. He grunted as he pulled any stray strands before he grabbed the hair tie from his mouth and tied the clump of hair into a ponytail. He smiled and let it fall behind his back, relishing in the lack of weight over the nape of his back. 

He hummed and thought about the things he needed to do. He would have to check on his farm and go back into the Nether for some supplies. He also needed to finish his basement. He sighed and twirled a finger in a strand of his hair. He let himself be immersed in his thoughts that he almost didn’t notice the knock on his door. He jerked from his position, tangling his entire hand in his hair in his surprise. He yelped and tugged at his hand, untangling it as he made his way to the door. That was a first. 

When he opened the door, he did not expect to see Technoblade. He also did not expect to smell soot and a bit of blood on him. He blinked before clearing his throat, “Everything okay?”

  
  
“No.”

Dream smiled apologetically and stepped aside, “Do you want to come in?” 

“Please.”

Dream nodded and closed the door when Technoblade fully walked in, tugging at the chains that kept his cloak on loose. The cloak fell and soon the owner slumped against a chair, burying his head into his hands. Dream sighed and walked to the kitchen, thinking of what brew would best suit the situation. When the kettle let out a whistle, he placed it on a tray and brought it out with two empty cups. 

He set the tray down on the table and gently poured the honey infused tea into the cups. He let the sweet scent waft into the air as he offered the cup to the stressed man. Sweet things always calmed him down, he hoped it did the same with the warrior in front of him. He waited and kept the steaming cup of tea in his hands. 

“Thank you.” Technoblade rasped, eyes cast downwards as he took the cup into his hands.

“You’re welcome.” Dream smiled warmly.

“Is it- is your offer to stay-”

“It’s always open.” Dream finished for him, nodding. 

“But Tubbo might-”

“He might.” Dream mused, taking a sip from his tea. “But I won’t let him hurt you or go near you if you don’t want to.” 

Technoblade paused for a moment, staring at him with his boar mask still on. There was silence as they stared at each other before Technoblade chuckled and reached behind his head and unclipped his mask, “Thank you.”

Dream hummed and gave him a sharp nod, “This place is a safe haven, for me and for anyone who steps in. I don’t want conflict to reach here.”

Technoblade blinked before he smiled, chuckling, “Right, that actually sounds really nice.”

“Coming from the so-called ‘Blood God’?” Dream teased with a small huff.

“I dunno, nerd.” Technoblade drawled, leaning back and sipping the hot tea. “It sounds like a nice venture. I might even go retire.”

“Oh?” Dream smiled encouragingly, “How so?”  
  


“I don’t know. Maybe find some secluded place and build a cottage.” Technoblade snorted, “I think you of all people would understand.”

Dream let out a laugh, setting his cup down, “Well, I mean- it works, does it not?”

Technoblade smiled along with him and nodded, “I might go further North… maybe somewhere cold.”

“The Arctic?” Dream mused, “A bit reminiscent, ain’t it?”

Technoblade raised an eyebrow, “You seem to know quite a lot about me.”

“Who wouldn’t.” Dream shrugged. He twisted the cup around on the table before he leaned back and rested his hands on his lap, “You came here to stay the night right?”

“Maybe even more.” Technoblade hummed. “I don’t know how long it’ll take-”

“That’s fine.” Dream smiled, nodding at him. “I actually managed to fix the upstairs of my home and there are two bedrooms there, you can take one.”

Technoblade gave a small smile, “And the room downstairs?”

Dream shrugged, standing up from the table, “It’s for injured people. I want easy access from the door to the room to ensure they won’t get hurt even more. Climbing the stairs is not at all practical for someone injured.” 

Technoblade snorted and shook his head, “Understandable, but why the extra room?”

Dream blinked and looked at Technoblade, “I’ve had uninjured visitors. It’d be rude to let them sleep in a room filled with blood.”

Technoblade stood from his seat and stretched, “Well, you do have valid points, nerd.”

Dream snorted, “If you insist on calling me a nerd, why not another spar?”

Technoblade’s eyes glinted with challenge as he took hold of his red cape. He smirked and picked up his mask as well, “If you can situate me in my room, I might consider it.”

Dream barked out a laugh and gestured for Technoblade to follow him up the stairs with a grin. The two walked up to the second floor and Dream opened the door closest to the stairs. He gestured inside and tilted his head at Technoblade. The other warrior walked in and looked around at the modest looking room. He hummed and draped his cape over the bed, resting his mask over it. He turned back at Dream and grinned, the air by his hand shimmering before his sword appeared.

“About that spar?” Technoblade smirked, resting the blade over his shoulder.

Dream laughed and an axe appeared in his hand, “Shall we take this outside? I prefer to keep my house intact.”

Technoblade nodded and the two left the house. Technoblade paused at the door, his face scrunched up. Dream sent him a confused look which he waved off easily. Patches mewled as she stayed by the door, resting her head over her paws as the two stood in the center of the clearing. Dream adjusted his grip on his axe and kept an eye on Technoblade as he tested the weight of the diamond sword by swinging it around. The two stalled for a moment with Dream eyeing Technoblade and the other staring dead on at the blonde. 

There was a brief, tense pause before Dream smirked and charged forward. He brought the axe down and the diamond blade of the sword met it in the middle, causing sparks to fly. They locked in for a moment before Technoblade swiped sideways and stepped back. Dream, being one who preferred to strike fast, stepped forward and continued to hack away at Technoblade. The hybrid merely blocked all the attacks, eyes searching for any sign of an opening that he could use.

They continued the dance with Dream leading and Technoblade following along. There was a tense but comfortable silence as they continued with their graceful dance. Dream hummed as he continued to strike but he knew he would tire after long, he could tell Technoblade was waiting it out. It was like the roles had switched and Dream snickered. He feinted to the right and stepped back, swinging a large arc towards Technoblade to keep him back. 

Technoblade grunted and stepped back before he brought up his sword. Technoblade led the dance and Dream was forced to follow as he used his axe to parry all of the attacks. They locked blades for a moment, both of the warriors smirking at each other before they jumped back, their weapons causing sparks as they slid against each other. They circled around each other, Dream playfully loosening his grip on his axe. Technoblade caught this and charged forward with his sword.

  
  
Dream tossed his axe into the air and ducked down, swiping at Technoblade’s incoming feet. He jumped into a roll and crouched behind Technoblade, catching his axe before it hit the ground. He lunged forward and brought down the axe, something that got blocked easily with Technoblade twisting over and bringing his sword up. Dream could see the other was struggling and pushed more weight on his attack. He grinned and dodged to the right when he saw Technoblade’s foot shot out. He ducked into roll and slammed the blunt side of his axe against Technoblade’s sword hand. The pink haired warrior hissed and dropped the sword, raising an eyebrow when the axe’s blade rested by his neck. 

“You win.” He conceded with a sigh.

Dream grinned widely, “I know your tricks now!”

Technoblade snorted and bent down to pick up his sword, “Your hits are pretty quick.”

“It’s my style.” Dream shrugged. He felt lighter, enjoying the little bit of workout. It had cleared his mind a bit and he couldn’t help but let out a laugh. He let his axe vanish back into his inventory as he fell back into the soft grass and continued to laugh. He brushed off Technoblade’s concerned gaze, “I just- it felt too long, you know. I had so much in my mind and that spar really… it really made me feel lighter.”

Technoblade smiled and his sword disappeared- no doubt to the other man’s inventory- as he dropped down beside Dream, “I can’t blame you since I feel the same.”

“Care to elaborate what happened or are you uncomfortable about it?” Dream side eyed him as he brought his arms up and laid them behind his head. 

There was a long silence as the two calmed their breaths and racing hearts from the spar. Dream looked up at the clouds and waited for a response, itching to know what was happening currently. He needed to know why Wilbur was dead, he needed to know why L’manberg was blown up and why Technoblade and Tubbo were not on good terms anymore. He tilted his head to the side as he looked at Technoblade. He worried for his friends and how they were handling everything. 

Technoblade noticed him staring and hummed, “It… did not go well.”

“Oh?” Dream raised an eyebrow.

“Wilbur, he blew up L’manberg after installing Tubbo as president.” Technoblade explained. “I did not- I was not happy because I never liked governments, I keep telling Wilbur and Tommy this but instead they used my efforts to help them take down Manberg and rebuilt their own nation- again.”

Dream sat up, brushing a stray strand of his blonde hair away from his face, “Oh…”

“I do not regret releasing two withers on them.” Technoblade admitted, playing with his long pink hair. “They betrayed me and yet have the courage to stand before me and say I betrayed them.”

Dream frowned and played with the grass under his fingers, “They shouldn’t say that…”

“I’m now public enemy number one and they’re rebuilding L’manberg.” Technoblade drawled.

“Uh, what about… Wilbur?” Dream whispered, pulling at the grass until they gave way at their roots. “I- I met Ghostbur and uh-”

“Oh.” Technoblade shot up, shifting a bit to sit more comfortably. “That… Phil appeared and tried to dissuade Wilbur. He told me that Wilbur was adamant on his path and still blew up L’manberg.” He paused and closed his eyes, “After which, while I was confronting Tommy and everyone else about their betrayal, Wilbur asked Phil to kill him.”

Dream gripped the grass tightly as he closed his eyes and took a shuddering breath. No wonder Ghostbur said it was a broken promise. He let out a breath and opened his eyes, looking at Technoblade’s confused and slightly concerned gaze. He waved it off with a weak chuckle, “I might’ve met Wilbur during one of his breakdowns and I-”

“-got attached?” Technoblade finished for him.

Dream swallowed and gave a wobbly smile, “How can I not? I live alone… is it wrong to want some friends?”

Technoblade searched his face for a moment before he sighed and scooted closer, “Nah, nerd.”

Dream chuckled and sniffed. He ran a hand through his hair and played with the strands. His eyes moved to look at Technoblade’s beautiful pink hair and he continued to stare. Technoblade chuckled and tugged at the tie that kept it in a rat’s tail style.

“Want to braid my hair?” Technoblade suggested.

Dream’s eyes lit up as he beamed, “I do!”

He ran a hand through the silky hair and let out a breath of awe. It felt so smooth and like strands of silk in his hands. He carefully took strands into his hands and braided the hair. He hummed as he unconsciously brought out a few flowers in his inventory to use as decoration. When he finished, the long pink hair was bunched into a beautiful braid with white flowers to accent it’s bright colors. 

Technoblade hummed as he ran a careful hand over the handiwork of his newly acquired roommate. He missed it when Phil used to braid his hair. He enjoyed it greatly when he felt calming fingers rake through the long strands and pull them into a beautiful braid. He hadn't braided his hair the entire time, choosing more to focus his time on collecting materials and tools so he had kept it in a rat tail style or even a bun when he had more time. Still, those were all time wasted now that all the traitors had his tools and materials.

“Thank you, I like it.” Technoblade smiled, absentmindedly playing with the end of his braid. 

“Glad you do!” Dream chuckled, beaming. 

Technoblade caught the sight of Dream’s ponytail and hummed, “Want me to braid yours?”

Dream jerked in his place and looked at Technoblade. The pink haired warrior fidgeted under his gaze. Technoblade knew that touching someone’s hair was a personal and private thing, even he was cautious of letting people touch his own hair. Previously, only Phil and Wilbur were the ones who played with it but now he had extended this to Clay. He wondered if he overstepped his boundaries and was about to retract his statement when Clay tugged at his own hair tie and grinned.

“Sure, you don’t have to braid it though. Just play around, I took it out of a braid a while ago because I was getting a bit of a headache.” Dream nodded, laying on Technoblade’s lap with a cheeky smile.

Technoblade rolled his eyes and lightly pushed at Dream’s face, “You’re insufferable, Clay.”

Dream let out a laugh and relaxed when he felt gentle hands card through his hair. He hummed and closed his eyes, hoping that this can help both of them relax for the day. They both needed it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY BUT 2K KUDOS???? 2K??? PLEASE GUYS, I'M SOBBING THANK YOU SO MUCH <333
> 
> Also, hilariously enough so many of you want Dream to punt the imposter :) We'll see, we'll see...
> 
> I hope you enjoyed what I dubbed as the Rivalstwt Chapter HAHJADHSAJFSA
> 
> ALSO YOU MADE FANART?? PLEASE??/
> 
> [FANART <33](https://www.instagram.com/p/CLazaYunL3K/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link)
> 
> [FANART AGAIN ](https://saltycheerio.tumblr.com/post/642677536716947456/cottagecore-dre-pog-this-is-fanart-for-angsty01)


	10. Conflict

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream's world broke once and he picked up the pieces and created the life he had now...
> 
> His world broke once and he didn't know what he would do if it broke again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I don't know if these could be triggers but just in case!!
> 
> Triggers: Siblings Arguing, Replacement Issues, Inadequacy Issues and Panic Attack (?)
> 
> Added Note!! Dee is DreamXD if any of you are confused <33

Dream stretched as he yawned, hearing his bones crack satisfyingly. He smiled and patted Patches from where she had moved to sleep on his pillow. He chuckled and ran a hand through his tangled hair. He shook his head and stood up, looking through his chests to decide what to wear today. He paused when he remembered the mental note he had told himself he would do. 

_He needed to visit Dee and Drista in the End._

It was something he had forgotten to do when he had run away. It was something he forgot to do when he realized there was an impostor using his name. It was the two people he forgot about when he was entrapped by his worries and insecurities. It was the two people he forgot to visit despite promising himself to do so. It’s already been four days since he remembered their existence because of Ghostbur and he got distracted again because of Technoblade. He groaned and leaned his forehead against the chest’s cover. He loved his siblings with all his heart but sometimes they tended to be chaotic and secluded. 

He hummed and closed his eyes, trying to think of a way to talk to them without provoking Drista in some way. She was always more temperamental than her older brothers. He chuckled and straightened. Maybe once he spoke to the two he’d finally get his answers and finally be able to plan around it. He hummed and picked his clothes, choosing to wear a light green polo shirt the village gifted him and some jeans. He pulled on some boots and grabbed his comb. He walked out while combing his hair.

  
  
He jerked when he saw Technoblade downstairs, sitting by the table. He raised an eyebrow and Dream paused for a moment, realizing this was the first time he wore something that seemed overly formal. He chuckled and waved at his new roommate.

“Hey.” He greeted, putting his comb into his inventory.

  
  
Technoblade gave a wry smile, “Going anywhere special?”

“Shut up.” Dream rolled his eyes.

Technoblade barked out a laugh, leaning back and crossing his arms, “I thought I was the fancy one, after all.”

“I can be fancy too.” Dream puffed his cheeks out as he tugged at the ends of his hair. He pulled them together and tied it into a rat’s tail style. “I’m just meeting some people.”

“Oh? I thought you didn’t know anyone.” Technoblade narrowed his eyes, playing with the end of his braided hair. It looked like he didn’t take it off last night. 

Dream smiled as he tried to think of a reason for his trip. He can’t exactly just tell Technoblade outright no matter how much he wanted the man to trust him. He can’t just tell him he was Dream and he needed to go out and speak to his siblings about an imposter. He internally scoffed at that. Technoblade would try and kill him before anything else. He shifted on his spot and shoved his hands into his jean pockets.

“I do.” Dream huffed, turning away. “They were asking for me and I- I feel bad for ignoring their calls.”

Technoblade tilted his head and stared at Dream, like he was searching for something- anything in his face. He hummed in response and rolled his eyes, “Alright. Let’s say I believe you-”

“Great!” Dream grinned, backing up into the kitchen. “Let’s have a great breakfast then!” 

He disappeared into the kitchen before Technoblade could say something else, rummaging through the chests to prepare their breakfast. He shoved a few potatoes into the furnace before he turned and cut some other potatoes into strips. He grinned as he placed them into some boiling water and watched as they turned golden. Hopefully, Technoblade won’t pry more into where he was going.

He couldn’t exactly say he was _leaving_ the server to meet his siblings. He couldn’t even say he was going to the _End_. Now, that was asking for his head on a platter. Even if he said he was the actual and real Dream, he had no proof and he wasn’t that close with Technoblade. He stepped back for a moment, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. He can’t really explain anything without the risk of revealing himself. He sighed and leaned on the table, letting his head fall as he tried to think. 

He _could_ easily leave immediately after giving Technoblade breakfast, saying he was in a hurry and that his “friends” were waiting. He closed his eyes and sighed. He just hoped Technoblade wouldn’t feel too offended if Dream was in a hurry. He didn’t want to make the warrior uncomfortable in any way, enjoying his company and presence. Even on days when they were both silently working on getting materials, for both Technoblade’s new home and Dream’s basement, it was still a calming and comforting activity. It made Dream feel more at ease than anything before. 

But now that ease would have to be put on a temporary halt. Dream hoped he wouldn’t ruin anything that with this trip but he knew he couldn't’ keep setting it back. Who knows how long this peace will be kept until another problem takes his attention. He _needs_ to see Dee and Drista. He didn’t know if Dee had interacted with this imposter but Drista did. She had gone to the Overworld at some point so it was impossible that she didn’t meet this imposter.

**Unless, of course, she also believed this imposter was** **_you_ **.

He swallowed thickly as that traitorous part of his mind whispered to him. He curled in on himself, his shoulders hunching as he took a deep breath. He closed his eyes and considered it. It’s impossible to mistake the impostor for him, right? You can’t just fake having admin blood- unless the imposter was also an admin. He opened his eyes and brought his trembling hands close to his chest. Dee must be able to know the difference, right? He must be able to tell that this wasn’t Dream, right?

**But then why did his friends believe in the imposter?**

Dream took a sharp breath and he shivered. His siblings couldn’t have replaced him. It’s- they couldn’t have. He was- they knew him better than that. They’d have realized something was wrong. They did not just blindly believe an imposter. He shook his head, taking shaky breaths to calm his racing heart and trembling hands. They weren’t stupid. They could tell immediately. They could-

Before another thought decided to plague his mind, his timer started to ring and he jumped from his spot, blinking. He turned and shakily let out a laugh, reaching out and turning the timer off. He sniffed and wiped at his eyes. He didn’t cry but he could tell he was teary. He took a deep breath and carefully took out the heated food. He busied himself with preparing the breakfast on the plates and ignored the niggling feeling at the back of his head. He ignored how it continued to whisper his insecurities. He wasn’t going to deal with that now. 

He looked down at the steaming plates, the smell of food was intoxicating. He smiled and reached into the chest to take out some raw fix. He deboned it and placed the meat on a round bowl for Patches to eat when she comes down. He walked out with the plates on a tray. Dream smiled at Technoblade and placed the plates on the table. He hummed and crouched down, carefully placing Patches’ plate on the floor before he called out to her. She appeared by the stairs and carefully walked towards her plate. 

Dream took his seat across Technoblade and they ate breakfast in silence. When Dream finished, he almost yelped when Technoblade took his plate. The pinkette rolled his eyes and snorted, “You needed to leave, right?”

“Yeah.” Dream smiled nervously, picking at the wood of his chair.

“Right, I’ll take care of the dishes.”

“Wait- I can-”

“Nah, nerd.” Technoblade dodged him as he reached out. “This is what roommates do right? They take care of things when their friend goes out.”

Dream felt his chest warm at that. It’s been so long since he was called a friend. He gave a small smile and merely nodded at Technoblade. When he watched Technoblade enter the kitchen, his smile dropped and his chest tightened. He can’t believe he’s lying to Technoblade and the hybrid is still this nice to him. He let out a sigh and rolled the polo shirt’s sleeves up to his elbows. He walked to the kitchen and leaned on the door frame.

“I’ll be leaving, I don’t know how long I’ll be gone so… don’t wait up?” Dream gave a hesitant smile. 

Technoblade glanced back at him and nodded, waving his hand that was filled with soap suds, “Take care, nerd.”

“Right, you too.” Dream chuckled. He turned and ran a hand through his hair, “Take care of Patches as well.”

“I know, don’t die.” Technoblade called out. 

Dream chuckled as he turned back and petted Patches’ head. She mewled while Dream smiled and walked out of the door. He walked through the forest and when he was a significant distance away, he reached out and the very space in front of his hand rippled. A square cut appeared and instead of seeing straight through, what appeared were lines of code. Dream hummed as he looked through the familiar language as he reached inside. He pulled on a certain string of code and his vision rippled and glitched before he appeared somewhere else. The air turned humid and he blinked for a moment, trying to shake away the vertigo of teleporting. 

When he regained his senses, he looked down at the bubbling lava below him. He smiled when his eyes caught the familiar glass frames of the End Portal. He breathed in and closed his eyes. It’s been a while since he’s done this. He reached into the code again and pulled on a certain string of numbers. The string flickered, the code changing to fit his needs and Dream checked his inventory. There they were. He hummed and closed the box that transcended reality. He picked at the Eyes of Ender and weighted it in his hands. He smiled and began to place them around the Portal. 

He watched as it flared to life, a dark expanse that was filled with stars replaced the sight of the lava. It looked as if it sucked everything inside, the light, the sound- anything. Dream, with a smile, willingly let it suck him in as he fell forwards. His world went off kilter and everything felt like it turned upside down. When he opened his eyes, his feet were solidly planted on an obsidian platform and he could hear the distant roar of the Dragon. He shoved his hands into his jean pockets and walked off the platform. 

As expected, before he could plummet to the dark abyss of nothingness and pain, he disappeared. He blinked and shook his head, snorting. The vertigo of being teleported by someone else always irked him. When he calmed down, he opened his eyes and looked up. He grinned when he was met face to face with a pouting Drista and an annoyed Dee. 

“Hello.” Dream greeted the two amicably. 

“You idiot!” Drista screamed, pouncing on his immediately and slamming her fisted hands on his chest repeatedly.

“Idiot is an understatement.” Dee drawled. 

Dream scowled and gently took Drista’s hands in his, “If it’s the imposter-”

“I made him.” Dee brushed it off. “Just a demon lingering around with no purpose. It’s a glitch, every glitch I encounter can always be molded into something… _more_.”

So it was Dee? It was Dee that made the imposter? It was Dee that made Dream lose focus for so long? It was Dee that made him feel so anxious that maybe someone was using his name and face to hurt his friends? So it was _Dee_ who decided to do something without telling him? Of course it was him. Of course _he_ would always do something to make everything _perfect_ . It was just like him. It was just like him to _walk into Dream’s life and do something without even telling him anything-_

Dream narrowed his eyes at the tone of his older brother, “What’s that supposed to mean.”

“It means that when you do stupid things like disappear off the grid for nearly a _year_ with no communication whatsoever then I can easily fix it.” Dee sneered, stepping forward. 

Drista scowled as she looked between the two, stepping away as she pouted to the side. She watched as Dee and Dream glared at each other, the tension inside the room rising. 

“Maybe a little visit wouldn’t hurt? You know, so I won’t think someone stole my fucking identity?” Dream threw his hands up. “Like, would that be too hard, Dee?”

“I don’t know, maybe you should’ve thought twice when you ran away!” Dee hissed back, crossing his arms. 

Dream’s eye twitched as he scoffed, “Right, you could’ve easily teleported to me, Dee.”

“Well, I was too busy dealing with your friend’s memories.” Dee stepped forward. “Maybe if you didn’t just disappear overnight and cause a serverwide panic that forced me to mess with their memories-”

“You _messed_ with their memories?” Dream hissed, stepping forward as well. His eyes glowed with anger as he met Dee’s gaze. “Is that why Wilbur’s ghost doesn’t remember?”

Dee paused before he looked at Dream, “What?”

“There was a _glitch_ and now look at Wilbur- or well, Ghostbur.” Dream gestured around wildly, scowling. “He doesn’t remember anything! Nothing! Look what _good_ your tweaking did!”

He knew he shouldn’t have said that. He knew that picking at Dee’s perfectionistic mind would only fan the flames of the argument further but he didn’t care. He was tired of this. He was tired of being the cause of everything. He just wanted to run away. He didn’t _ask_ for any of this. He didn’t _want_ any of this. ~~Even if he knew that antagonizing Dee further would just make things worse and it’d be **his** fault. ~~

There was a pause as the two stared dead on at each other, Dream panting after he had raised his voice. Dee’s arms fell to his side and he clenched it into fists as he snarled at Dream, taking a step back and straightening. Dream gritted his teeth and straightened as well, trying to seem taller than the other. The two continued to seethe in their own anger before finally Dee snapped.

“Well clearly the imposter is doing a better job than you are if all you’re going to do is come here and complain!” Dee screamed, his voice cracking at the end.

That hit a chord in Dream as he felt his chest tighten. Is that how they thought of him? So easily replaceable? Is that why his friends weren’t able to tell he was different even with the memory alteration? Is that why he was left alone for so long? Because the imposter was _better_ than him? Was he kinder? Was he brighter? Did he laugh louder? Did he fit everyone’s expectations of him? Was he truly _better_?

Dream stepped back and snarled back at his brother, “Maybe you should have him as your _new_ brother if that’s the case! I came here for answers, not a lecture.”

He hid how his voice shook with anger. He wasn’t sad. He was angry. He was angry that the two did this. He was angry that they didn’t _visit_ him. He was angry that they didn’t give him any answers. He was angry that they kept him in the dark. For what? What did they gain from this? A _newer and better_ brother? A more complacent and obedient little brother? A more chaotic and lenient older brother? A _better_ him with no _insecurities and problems and stupidity and-_

“Well you deserve a lecture!” Dee stomped his foot, his light blue eyes glowing with power as the air around him glitched. “You’re just so irresponsible and you don’t even _think_ about the consequences of your actions! You’re so **_selfish_ **!”

Dream stepped back in shock, his eyes wide and mouth hanging open. Dee stopped, panting as he blinked at Dream and recalled what he just said. There was a minute of silence as the two registered the words and Drista stood at the side with wide eyes and her hands to her mouth. Dream pressed his lips into a thin line and scowled, turning around in hopes to hide how his eyes were brimming with tears. 

“So what if I’m selfish, can’t I ask for a break?” He hated how his voice cracked and how his hands trembled when he shoved them into his pockets. He swallowed thickly and kept his chin up as he walked away from his silent siblings, “At least I had the audacity to _visit_ you. Where were you two in the many _months_ after you dealt with their memory? Hiding away in anger? In spite? Just waiting for _me_ to come visit just so you can tell me how _selfish_ I am?”

Dream scoffed and completely walked out of the room. He appeared on the balcony of the beautiful towers of the End Cities. He gripped the rails of the balcony and looked down at the vast expanse of endstone that soon fell into the void. He climbed on top of the rails and reached into the code. The cold wind blew past him and ruffled his long hair as he took a deep breath. 

“Dream, wait-” Drista called out. 

He turned back to see Dee and Drista by the door. He scoffed and turned back, "You got your perfect brother, don't even think of talking to me ever again. You had your chance to visit me… if you ever _dare_ to visit me I will not hesitate to make you both _leave_.”

He closed his eyes and fell forward, letting the familiar feeling of vertigo take him away and bring him back. He didn’t dare go back to the stronghold. Dee can take care of that himself if he wants to. Keep the world _perfect_ as he always wanted to. Dream opened his eyes and fell to his knees in the middle of the forest, kneeling over and bringing a hand to his face as he sobbed. 

**He was so stupid.**

How could he think of doing that? He just caused another big problem. He just broke another attachment. He just _ruined_ everything again. He shook in his spot as he let out a choked sob. His tears wouldn’t stop flowing as he recalled everything in his mind. He had been so _angry_. He felt so betrayed and useless. Was he really that easily replaceable? Was the demon- the stupid glitch- better than him? Is that why everyone liked him enough to not notice? Is that why he was left alone for so long? Left alone to stew in his thoughts and think about how bad he had been? Left alone to think that maybe everything was better with him gone? 

**But everything** **_was_ ** **better with him gone, right?**

He hastily wiped at his tears, noticing how the sun was slowly setting and how the skies turned darker. He sniffed as he stood on shaky legs and began his slow trek back to his cottage. He felt so useless and so hollow. It was as if a big part of him was ripped out and he was left trying to pick the pieces up again. It was like when he had first run away. His whole world had shattered and he was left to pick everything back and carefully put them together. 

He was left to create his perfect haven with the pieces of his mistakes. He was left to suffer through his insecurities and problems alone as he continued to build and fix his world. He continued to do so until he had everything fixed. His world wasn’t off kilter and he was whole again. Until it wasn’t and now everything is broken, not shattered, but he could feel the cracks. He could feel the inconsistencies and the pain. He could feel how hollow everything became. 

He didn’t want to pick the pieces back up again because he doesn’t know if he can do it a second time. He didn’t know if he could survive through the pricking in his hands with how the glass cut into him and he bled with tears. He didn’t know if he could survive picking it all up with breaking down and shattering himself. 

**Was he really selfish?**

He sucked in a deep and shaky breath and he brought his arms up and hugged his torso tightly. He gripped at his biceps and blinked away the tears as he continued to walk back home. He wasn’t selfish was he? He didn’t mean to run away. He didn’t mean to stay away. He just felt as if the server was better off without him. That maybe he was the source of everyone’s problems and suffering. That maybe his presence was like a virus to his friends that fed off of their pain.

He thought that he was doing everyone a favor. He had thought that maybe they didn’t look for him because he was right. He had stewed in those thoughts for way too long and it has become a deep rooted truth by now. It was a bitter pill to swallow for sure but he had swallowed it nonetheless. He had accepted it for so long, a lingering pain that was pushed to the back of his mind. The pain that kept his longing to go back in check. It kept him alone and isolated and forced him to stay. 

It all _broke_ apart when Dee just confirmed it. He was replaced. All his darkest fears came to be realized. They didn’t necessarily need _him_ . They just needed someone _like_ him. Someone who was better. Someone who had better control. Someone who could fit everyone’s _perfect_ image. How could the imposter _not_ be perfect? Dee made him. Dee always made everything perfect. Something Dream could never do. 

He had run because he thought that maybe all his friends could live a more peaceful life.

**And they did, with a better and more perfect** **_you_ ** **.**

Dream swallowed thickly as the trees thinned and he saw his cottage. He sighed and hastily wiped at his eyes, rubbing at them to get the tears away. It was no use coming back home in tears to worry Technoblade. He didn’t have to tell the hybrid all about his problems and insecurities. He needed to keep the kind and strong facade up. If he told him his problems and insecurities ~~he’d leave him like everyone did~~ he’d feel burdened. 

He breathed in and calmed his racing heart. He cleared his thoughts and closed his eyes. When he felt steady and ready, he opened them. He was almost taken aback when it started to rain slowly. He looked up at the falling droplets that soon turned plenty and sighed. He closed his eyes and felt the water run down his face. He could say that he got caught in the rain and that’s why his face was wet. He couldn’t explain the red and puffy eyes but he hoped Technoblade was too tired to notice. 

He breathed in and let it out. He opened his eyes and looked at the warm cottage. He had this at least. He had all of this to come back to. He didn’t need anything else. ~~He wished he didn’t~~. He put on a brave and wide smile and started to walk back, ignoring how his clothes annoyingly clung to his body. He bit his lip and placed a hand on the doorknob. With a deep breath, he threw it open.

“I’m back-”

His greeting died on his throat when his eyes caught the open chest that he had hidden under the floor that was now open and bare. His throat closed up on him when he looked up and met Technoblade’s dark gaze as he held the damned porcelain mask. Lightning flashed outside as Technoblade slowly set the mask on the table, resting it on top of his familiar green hoodie, and stood up. Dream swallowed, still shaking from his encounter with his siblings and wet from the rain that raged outside. He watched slowly as Technoblade approached him with crossed arms and the thunder soon came, letting out a booming sound that seemed to echo for thousands of miles.

But nothing was louder than what came out of Technoblade’s mouth that next moment. 

“We need to talk, Dream.”

_That was when Dream’s entire world collapsed around him and he couldn’t find it in himself to breathe._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp! *claps hands* I have once again tainted something fluffy with ANGST. I can't seem to hold back this curse huh?
> 
> So... sibling tension and inadequacy issues huh? We love that.
> 
> (Don't you also love it when both sides make sense and you can't tell which one is at fault?)
> 
> Also, I noticed that the Rivalstwt Chapter was before this and ha h a all good things must come to an end huh ;)))
> 
> So,, guys,, those of you who were in my Insta and said you enjoyed Big Brother DreamXD was nice... uh well haha :D
> 
> _  
> [VERY PRETTY FANART](https://www.instagram.com/p/CLn26u_ACgX/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link)  
> _


	11. Talk, That's All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream runs.
> 
> But he finds himself back in the small cottage with his new roommate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: Panic Attack and Insecurities

Dream’s first response was to let out a gasp and step back, his hands trembling as he looked between Technoblade and his mask. Then, his instincts kicked in and he turned and ran. He ran into the cold and dark embrace of the forest. He ran _away_ from the warmth, for once. He ran and ran and continued to run. His chest tightened and he panted, running from the judgemental stare of Technoblade and the sudden revelation. Running from his problems like he always did. He gritted his teeth and closed his eyes as he pushed himself to go further and further. The rain continued to pour, harder and harder, as he ran through the thick trees. 

It didn’t matter how wet his face and clothes had become. He didn’t care how his vision blurred- whether it’s from the rain or his tears, he didn’t know- and how he was choking for breath as he sobbed. He didn’t care how uncomfortably the clothes had clung to him and how his legs screamed at him to stop. He didn’t care that he didn’t know where he was going. He didn’t care that there were monsters roaming the forest around him. He didn’t care. He just wanted to run away. So he did. He continued to run. 

He could hear his heart pumping in his ears as he continued to run, an arm going up to wipe away his tears furiously. His breath hitched once more and he continued to run and run. He let his head hand long as he pushed through the rain, ignoring how the rain continued to pour. How it pounded against his back and how his hair stuck to his face wetly. He ignored it all. 

Dream’s breath hitched when his ankle caught a root and he fell into the muddy ground. His knees splashing against the mud and his palms being scraped against the dirt and stone. His entire body laid in the dirt as he was soaked in both ends, from the rain and the mud. He hissed in pain and sniffed, staying in that position as his body trembled. He shifted his feet, ready to scramble up as he remembered he was being chased, a jolt of pain shot through him as he let out a yell. He pushed himself up shakily as he glanced back at his feet, he had twisted his ankle. He winced and stood up, leaning on his better foot to avoid the pain. 

Dream tensed when he heard footsteps closing in on him and he made another mad dash. He was slower this time, what with his sprained ankle, but nonetheless still faster than the person chasing him. He swallowed thickly and brought his muddy hand up to wipe at his face. He sniffed and continued to push forward before he slowed down and stopped, leaning against a tree. He panted as he brought his hand up to rub at his eyes again. He rubbed at them stubbornly, hating how the mud spread across his face and how his eyes continued to sting. He shifted on his feet and let out a small whimper when another jolt of pain shot up. 

He hung his head low as he let out short and shallow breaths. The rain poured on his body, the water hitting his back heavily despite remaining under the shade of the tree. He let out a shaky breath as he tried to blink away the tears- or was it the rain water- from his eyes. He shivered when a particularly strong breeze brushed past him and almost curled in on himself. He yelped and jumped when a heavy coat was placed over his head and draped over his figure. He landed on his foot wrong and whimpered in pain, ignoring how a strong hand grabbed him around his shoulders and pulled him close to a warm chest. He sniffed and flinched when he heard a crossbow arrow get fired. He didn’t expect for a dying creeper’s hiss to follow it and he blinked. 

“You’re a handful.” Technoblade sighed, his hand tightening and squeezing his shoulder comfortingly. 

Dream shook in his hold as he tried to shift away from the hybrid. He knew. He _knew._ Why was he still being nice? Why was he still being this soft and caring? Didn’t he _hate_ him? Didn’t he want him dead, like everyone? He- he probably wants answers before leaving and telling everyone about him. Then- then he won’t have a place to leave to. What would everyone say? Would they hate him? Would they try and kill him? Force him back? Would they ask questions? No, Dream feared the questions the most. He feared them because he didn’t have any answers. 

While Dream was trapped in his daze of worries, Technoblade sighed and kept his crossbow in his inventory. He hooked his other arm under Dream’s knees and carried the blonde bridal style. He noticed how the front of his clothes were muddied and shook his head. They’re both definitely going to be sick after this. He snorted and looked around, taking note of his surroundings before he broke into a run, keeping Dream close to his chest. He swerved between the trees, easily navigating through the dark and slippery forest while avoiding the many monsters that were prowling about. 

A few arrows grazed past the air as Technoblade ran past but none of them hit their intended target. It wasn’t long before they reached the clearing with Dream’s home. Technoblade looked down at Dream as the blonde shivered and pushed himself closer to him, in any hopes for finding warmth. Technoblade sighed and shook his head, _he’d be surprised if they weren’t sick after this_.

He carefully walked inside the house and toed off his muddy boots, leaving them by the door. He avoided the open hole he had made in the floor and carefully pushed open the door to what they ended up dubbing ‘infirmary room’. He carefully set Dream on the bed and took off his boots, careful in his actions when dealing with the sprained ankle. He had seen Dream fall and had expected him to stay down but he had stubbornly got up and started running again. Technoblade shook his head at the memory and focused on his task, the ankle seemed to be swelling a bit.

“You’re an idiot.” Technoblade sighed, reaching over to the chest to grab some bandages and healing potions that they had stocked up.

“Why?” Dream sniffled.

“Because you sprained your ankle but you still continued to _run_.” Technoblade deadpanned.

“No I meant- why are you still doing this?” Dream sniffled, pulling the velvet cape around him tighter. “I- you know who I am.”

“And I have questions but your foot takes priority.” Technoblade answered simply, wrapping the sprained area up with bandages. “I need you to take half of the potion.”

“But-”

“Take the potion, Dream.” Technoblade interrupted him, his tone and voice serious. 

Dream sniffed and shakily reached out, taking a few hesitant sips of the potion while side-eyeing Technoblade. The other sighed and sat at the edge of the bed, crossing his arms as he stared at Dream dead-on. 

“If it makes you feel better,” he paused, considering his words, “I’m not mad.”

“You won’t… leave me?” Dream asked weakly, his hands shaking as he set the potion bottle down, having drunk half of it already. 

“I won’t. I just want an explanation. I just wanted to talk, that's it.” Technoblade met his eyes, hoping he could convey his sincerity. “Especially with the fact that there is another dude with short hair who sounds and looks exactly like you, just- masked.”

“Right.” Dream swallowed, his throat feeling a bit itchy. He cleared his throat and straightened. 

It was going to come out sooner or later. He just had to tell him the truth. Just tell him the truth no matter how stupid and selfish it sounded. Tell him the truth that he had kept for so many years. Tell him the truth that caused Dee and Drista to drift away from him. Tell him that truth about how tragic his life was. Tell him the truth that everything was _his_ fault in some way and he couldn’t ever hope to fix it. Tell him the truth about the cowardly leader who ran with his tail between his legs when he realized just how horrible he had been.

He let out a sharp gasp as the tears pricked his eyes and flowed down his already wet and muddy face. His breath hitched as he brought his hand up and wiped away at the tears. He felt so weak. So vulnerable. Why was it so hard to tell the truth? 

He opened his mouth and nothing came out. His chest tightened and it was as if he was being squeezed into a tight room. He tightened his grip on the sheets and snapped his head up when he felt a heavy hand rest on his shoulder. He met Technoblade’s eyes and his breathing quickened. What if Technoblade would hate him? Would he see him as selfish? Would he leave him like Dee and Drista? Would he call him stupid and irrational? Would he-

He hadn’t noticed how his breathing picked up while he was caught in his torrent of thoughts. He swallowed thickly and tried to calm his breathing when he felt the hand on his shoulder press down comfortingly, another hand moving to run through his slowly drying hair. His breathing stuttered for a moment as Technoblade pulled him close and hugged him. Not too tight but it was enough to help him ground himself. 

He took a big gulp of air before he clung to Technoblade and buried his head in his shoulder. He shook in his hold and tried to control his breathing as he clutched at the back of Technoblade’s shirt. There was a moment of silence as Technoblade gave hushes reassurances and rubbed comforting circles around his back. Dream sucked in a deep breath and buried his face in his chest, heaving as he blocked out his thoughts.

It took a while before Dream finally calmed down and blinked away the tears, resting his forehead against Technoblade’s chest as he heaved. He closed his eyes and swallowed, breathing through his nose as he slowly let go of Technoblade’s shirt.

“I- I’m fine now.” He rasped. “I’m okay.”

“You can take it slowly.” Technoblade muttered, “You don’t have to tell me everything right away.”

“No- no you deserve-” he swallowed thickly, “you deserve to know.”

“Then let’s go about this some other way.” Technoblade cleared his throat, loosening the hug but not letting go. He kept his hands on his shoulders to ground him. “How about I ask the question and you answer it to the best of your ability?”

“That- yeah, that can work.” Dream let out a raspy chuckle, his throat itchy. 

“When did you run away to live here?” 

Dream was half glad that Technoblade was so perceptive, it meant that he would be asking questions to deepen his understanding. To learn more about what he cannot perceive. He took a deep breath and straightened, looking at him in the eyes, “I ran after giving L’manberg their Independence.”

“So, after that war.” Technoblade mused, nodding. “Did you ever leave to go back? Even once?”

“No. I stayed here for… ever since I ran.” Dream chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “I didn’t… I didn’t feel the need to leave or participate in anything public.”

“So, the duel wasn’t you. Figures.” Technoblade drawled. “About his… other you?”

“Oh, right.” Dream swallowed. “It- that was the reason I left a while ago. I have- not many know this but I have siblings. An older brother and my younger sister. We all share the same blood so they’re both admins as well.”

Technoblade nodded, humming as he took in the new bit of information. Dream took that as a sign to continue. 

“They stay in the End most of the time, just playing around usually. I went and visited them to ask about the imposter, thinking that maybe Dee, my older brother, was behind it. He does look a lot like me.” Dream chuckled humorlessly. “When I spoke to them well… I got my answers and then some. The imposter is a glitch, a demon. Dee just refurbished him to be more sentient and act like me in some sense.”

Technoblade frowned, “Ah, that explains some things.”

“Oh?” Dream tilted his head to the side. 

Technoblade gently took his wrist into his hand and felt for a pulse. Dream blinked at the action, confused for a moment. The other nodded his head and hummed in confirmation, letting go of his wrist, “When we fought in the duel, I had grabbed his wrist to help him up once. I did not feel a pulse and I thought it was just an admin thing.”

Dream snorted, covering his smile, “No, no, we have pulses. Demons, yeah they don’t.”

“Also explains why whenever I fight you, you never bleed red.”

Dream blinked and sighed, “I guess that’s what happens when you have blood of such a mysterious and unknown race. No one questions the finer details like that.” He turned his head to the side and contemplated, “Demons are glitches like I said. Corruption of the code when left unchecked by the world’s admin or admins. They aren’t supposed to have a corporeal body so they take up forms that aren’t necessarily human. They don’t bleed or get hurt, they instead turn to goop. It’s like trying to hit a never ending slime, they just keep reforming and reforming.”

“That makes for a stubborn opponent.” Technoblade frowned, tracing circles on the blanket. 

“It does, you can’t really kill a demon.” Dream shrugged. “It’s the admin’s job to wipe them out of the code, make the code… clean again.”

“And that thing is posing as you?” Technoblade muttered.

Dream gave a strained smile, “It replaced me.”

There was a pause as Technoblade looked at him. It looked as if he was searching for something, anything. Dream pressed his lips into a thin line as he swallowed, lowering his eyes.

“Well, he’s a pretty horrible replacement.” Technoblade intoned, causing Dream to jump and look at him with wide eyes. “He’s acting super mysterious and stupid. Plus, he couldn’t even _beat_ me in a public duel. Big L.”

Dream couldn’t stop the laugh that clawed its way out of his throat, the amusement of Technoblade’s message and how he said it was not lost on him. It wasn’t long before he was bent over and wheezing, sounding as if his lungs were ready to collapse. A quick glance at Technoblade showed a small smile on his face as he shook his head. 

“I mean, I don’t think I’ve ever heard him laugh. Just grunting and humming and stomping around like he owns the place.” Technoblade added, enjoying how Dream finally let loose and how the tension from his shoulders were gone.

“Please- anything else?” Dream snorted.

“One last question.” Technoblade cleared his throat. When Dream nodded, he continued, “Are you going back?”

There was a pause as Dream stewed at the question. His mind went back to being clouded and dark before he shook his head, letting out a sigh. He looked up to meet Technoblade’s eyes, showing his resolve, “They seem to be faring a whole lot better without me around.”

Technoblade picked up at the bitter tone and decided not to dwell on the topic. He belatedly realized they were still wearing the semi-dry clothes from when they were in the rain and groaned. Dream blinked, raising an eyebrow at his groan.

“We’re going to be sick tomorrow.” Technoblade deadpanned.

“Well, I’m built different so I don’t think so.” Dream stuck out his tongue. “Sick is for the weak.”

Technoblade snorted, standing up, “Sure it is.”

“You’re the worst.” Dream pouted. He pulled the still damp cape around his shoulders.

“You’re the one with my cape.” Technoblade pointed out with a smirk. 

Dream snorted and they both walked out their self-proclaimed infirmary. Outside, Patches mewled at them imploringly and Dream chuckled, crouching to pet her reassuringly. He looked back at Technoblade who was walking up the stairs. He huffed and scooped Patches into his arms and moved to climb the stairs as well. The two exchange small greetings as they walk into their separate rooms. Dream stared at his bed and felt his shoulders slump. His body was heavier than normal and he yawned, his voice cracking at the end and he coughed. He shook his head and brushed it off to being tired as he fell against his bed, refusing to change out of exhaustion. 

The next day did not greet him nicely as he shot up from his bed in a sweat, his entire body burning internally. He groaned and ran a hand through his greasy hair. He sniffed, his nose clogged, as he pulled himself out of bed, dragging his blanket with him. He coughed into his fist as he leaned against the door, pushing it outwards. The sight that greeted him outside caused him to choke.

Just across from him was a disheveled Technoblade, his blanket similarly draped over his shoulder as he sniffled. His hair was sticking out everywhere and out of it’s braid, his crown missing as he glared at Dream with slightly bloodshot eyes. Dream let out a snort, running a hand through his long hair as well. They were both _sick_.

“I would like to put this on record.” Technoblade announced, his voice thick and raspy, “That this is _your_ fault.”

“Shouldn’t have run after me then.” Dream muttered, hissing when a headache hit him. He pressed his palm against his forehead to chase away the pounding headache. “Well, I’ll go make breakfast maybe?”

“Don’t cough into it nerd.” Technoblade sniffed. Dream merely snorted in response which descended into a hiss as the headache continued to pound.

The two stumbled down the stairs, mindlessly bumping against each other along the way as they swayed on their feet. When they managed to get down, Technoblade slumped against the table, splaying himself against the chair with his long legs thrown about. He laid his head on the table and panted, the short journey taking all the energy from his already tired body. He watched with half-lidded eyes as Dream stumbled towards the kitchen, leaning against the door frame for a quick moment before leaning away and practically falling into the kitchen. 

He snorted to himself, pulling the blankets closer to himself as he shivered from a breeze that didn’t exist. He checked the windows and the door and they both weren’t open. He scowled and sniffed, hating how clogged his nose was. The voice was thankfully silent with the odd ‘ _Sicknoblade_ ’ and ‘ _Dream sick_ ’ that floated about. He was thankful for their consideration as the headache that existed ever since he woke up was already enough to deal with. 

He closed his eyes and stuttered between lucidity and unconsciousness for a brief moment before a slam against the table caused him to jump. The sudden rush of blood down from his brain caused the headache to worsen and he groaned, slowly moving to rest his head against the table again. When the headache slowly went away, he cracked open his eyes to weakly glare at Dream who had collapsed on the chair across from him. 

“I made… meat.” He sluggishly explained. 

The two plates on the tray weren’t as presentable as before, notably because Dream was sick and didn’t have the brain power to actually try to be extra when presenting the food, but it was still appetizing. Technoblade reached out before he let his hand rest against the tray, tapping at the plate with his finger. 

It was appetizing but did he have the appetite?

“I want… to die.” Dream deadpanned, his voice cracking at the end. “This, I hate this.”

“Seconded.” Technoblade drawled. 

Dream shifted in his spot and winced, leaning his head against his propped up hand. He looked at the steaming food then at Technoblade. “We need to eat.”

“We do.”

“But do we _want_ to?”

“No.”

  
  
“Definitely not.” Dream agreed, closing his eyes. “I have potions of healing down in the basement.”

“How many?” Technoblade huffed, closing his eyes as well. 

“Uh… a lot?” Dream snorted at his own words. “I’ll go check.”

“Naah, you already cooked breakfast.” Technoblade sniffed, “I’ll go check. Try to eat while I’m gone.”

“No promises.” Dream watched Technoblade stand and walked towards the entrance to his basement. He remembered having to relocate the stairs just to place the trapdoor underneath them. Make it look inconspicuous but also easy to access. Dream rolled his eyes, he had to change the entire house’s interior just to get the design right but at least he did it while he was healthy. 

Dream turned to look at the food before him. He groaned and reached out, grabbing at the knife and fork. He sliced the cooked beef and popped the smaller slice into his mouth. He chewed and noted how bland the food tasted. He made a face, knowing it was because of his clogged nose. Why did the smell and taste sensors have to be connected? He closed his eyes and forced himself to swallow. He groaned and let his head hit the table, ignoring how it worsened his headache. He did not want to eat.

“So, there are six potions and I grabbed two.” Technoblade announced his arrival, placing the bottles carefully on the table as he sat down heavily on the chair. He leaned back and closed his eyes, hating how his face burned insistently. “Are we going to take it?”

“We gotta eat first.” Dream pointed out. “It tastes like crap.”

  
  
“Everything tastes like crap when you’re sick.” Technoblade retorted. 

The two sat in silence for a moment, stewing in their own thoughts and sickness. Dream groaned and buried his face in his arms while Technoblade huffed out a sigh which ended up in a harsh coughing fit. There was silence until the door slammed open causing the two to jump and stare at in surprise and bewilderment. 

Standing there in all his glory was a ghostly Schlatt. His hair was ruffled and floated in some areas with his horns curling around them and the entirety of his eyes were an inhumane milky white color. Instead of his usual suit, he wore an oversized light blue hoodie with a stitched heart on the left side. There was a minute pause as the ghost looked between Dream, Technoblade and the mask on the table. Dream turned to look at the mask and groaned, slamming his head against the table again. He forgot to keep that and the hoodie from when Technoblade had unearthed them last night. 

“What the fuck?” Schlatt, or Glatt, muttered, looking between the two with wide eyes. “Happened to you two?”

“Rain.” Technoblade answered simply, burying his head in his arms. 

Schlatt snorted, walking in and closing the door softly this time. “You’re fucking telling me this is the strong warrior ‘Blood God’ that fought against me and- holy fucking shit why the fuck is your hair long? Have I been dead for that long?”

“Different.” Dream muttered, “Will explain later. Sick.”

“No shit.” Schlatt snorted. 

  
There was a pause before Dream shot up, squinting at Schlatt, “You remember?”

“Everything, duh?” Schlatt raised an eyebrow, “This isn’t the first time I died in a world, you always get your memories back.”

“Oh fucking damn it.” Dream groaned, “That means Wilbur- er- Ghostbur only forgot because Dee messed with people’s memories! That or it’s the stupid Demon corrupting the code again.”

“Woah, lover boy forgot? Damn, this should be hilarious.” Schlatt grinned sharply. 

Technoblade shot the spectral ram hybrid with a small glare, “Why are you even here?”

“Well, I wanted to stick around for the whole funeral shtick the dumbasses had but I preferred that they think I left the server in its entirety.” Schlatt shrugged. “But we all know how hard that is so I snuck out and found this place.”

“It has been a few weeks since your death, I don’t think you just found this place.” Technoblade drawled.

“Oh fuck off, Blade.” Schlatt bared his teeth and rolled his eyes, “I walked around for a bit, maybe screwed around in the SMP with some invis pots.”

“Of course you did.” Technoblade snorted.

“Anyways,” Dream interrupted, “since you’re here, you might as well be useful to us.”

Schlatt looked at the two incredulously, “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“We are sick and poor children.” Dream switched his tone to sound even more pathetic, giving Schlatt the puppy dog eyes. “We need someone to take care of us.”

“No we don’t.”

Dream kicked Technoblade’s shin from underneath the table, “Yes we do.”

“You two are a fucking handful.” Schlatt dragged a hand down his face, closing his eyes. “But I’ll be damned if this isn’t going to be fucking hilarious too.”

Technoblade groaned, leaning back, “You’ve doomed us, Dream.”

“I have not.”

  
  
“Yes you did.” Technoblade shot back.

Schlatt smiled at their interactions. This might be different than what he was used to, does he necessarily care? No, no he does not. He winced when a plate broke and the meat was shoved into Technoblade’s face. Maybe he should care. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WE DELVING INTO THE SICK FIC BOIISSSS!!!!! 
> 
> This was all an elaborate scheme for me to write a sick fic, don't touch me. I love writing sick characters being half-lucid and being dumbasses half the time. So :D
> 
> Also... Schlatt :)
> 
> [FANART :D](https://www.instagram.com/p/CL01Y6SgsP1/?igshid=13mn8mjdgc2lq)
> 
> [FANART AGAIN POG](https://twitter.com/Shroombee1/status/1366957997419728901?s=20)
> 
> [MORE FANART <33](https://www.instagram.com/p/CMBjZywhwhM/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link)

**Author's Note:**

> Cottagecore Dream is very self indulgent cause I've always been attracted to this. Sue me. 
> 
> Comments and Kudos are very appreciated!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧
> 
> My Social Media if you wanna talk or make fanart!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧
> 
> Twitter: @Angsty01  
> Insta: @angsty01  
> Tumblr: @angsty01


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